I am not in the best of moods right now. Two other people I know got their food stamps. What in the hell is going on with me? Why do they continue to do this to me? I can’t keep eating only soup and crackers on a daily basis! If the food stamp people still plan on never sending me my stamps, I’ll starve cuz for all I know my next babysitting job could be ages from now. I only have a few bucks on me and a little in the bank. That’s got to be used for my electric bill. What did I do to deserve this? Is this compensation for my moving here? Just cuz I moved, God’s got to take away my food? Taking away my singing career and good sex is enough! Can’t I just have enough food to eat every day? Please, God! Take away the singing, take away Rosemarie and other people like her, make them dump on me, but don’t take away my food! Let me eat! Please let them send me my food stamps this week!

The only good news is that I got that journal through priority mail from Kim.

Later...

I thought I’d get up early today, or yesterday, I should say. I thought the lawnmowers would wake me, but I thought wrong. I was actually falling asleep as they were mowing the lawns.

Ellie is gonna wake me up at 1:00 with coffee.

I desperately need to go tanning. I don’t know about that, though. I just heard them say on TV it’ll be 112º tomorrow! I may have to hold off on my deep dark tan until September or October.

Wednesday I have a doctor’s appointment and I sure hope I’m not told anything I don’t want to hear. Andy says he’ll pick up my prescriptions the next day on his way home from work. I hope he remembers. He’s got shit for memory but he claims to be giving up pot for a few months.

I still haven’t made up my mind on whether or not to slip Rosemarie that note. I’m sure I’m wasting my time, and again, if it were meant to be I’d have found that out long ago. I’ll never be able to sleep with a woman as beautiful as she is. With my luck, she’ll refuse to even take the note when I hand it to her. If I do. Hey, why not one of these days? So what if I know it’ll come to nothing. The game of it is still fun.

Later...

Speaking of notes, I almost forgot to mention what Andy did. He delivered the same note Mark got to Rosemarie. At 11:30 or so, he was out taking a walk and he taped it to their door. Fay said she thinks Rick leaves before Rosemarie and I hope she’s wrong. I hope she gets it, but even if she doesn’t, naturally she’ll hear all about it. What a confusing way to start off your morning, regardless of who gets it first!