I guess “I’ll just lay down for a few minutes” really meant “I’ll take a nap.” I woke up kinda tired at 2:00 anyway, so I’m not too surprised. My sleep score was slightly low for me.

No pain or nausea after eating or now. I sure felt bad earlier, though. Yesterday was the same as after Red Lobster with nausea, cramps, and acid reflux. The only things I can guess that might have contributed to it were the nuts and the crackers I had yesterday. Usually, I sleep these things off when I have a problem but when I woke up, I noticed I was still a bit crampy and nauseous.

I messaged my docs and asked why I wasn’t sent directly to a surgeon since we know from the HIDA results that my gallbladder is low-functioning and needs to be removed. I just worry it’s going to be weeks or even months before the gallbastard is removed and my symptoms relieved. They said it pretty much had to do with insurance and the fact that my ultrasound didn’t show anything dangerous that would be considered an emergency. We talked about possibly going to the ER or urgent care, but since it wasn’t like I was doubled over in pain and unable to walk, I decided to just wait and look for ways to help myself. So between our research and a link they sent me, I’ve got a list of foods to avoid and foods good for gallbladder disease.

Some of the things that don’t help are that I haven’t been active enough lately (lol, too addicted to painting) and that I’m fat. I can’t lose weight, but I can certainly move my ass more and watch what I eat. No more snacks for a while! When I’m not outdoors, I’m going to make a point of doing 5-minute walking/jogging sessions on the treadmill when the weather isn’t suitable for outdoor activity. I need to build up my endurance, so I’ll start with doing 5 minutes a day for a week where I alternate between walking and jogging. The week after that, I’ll do it at the beginning and end of my day. The week after that, I’ll do it at the beginning, middle, and end of my day. I think 15 minutes is enough because I’m active with other things.

I will also work my core every other day and try to watch what I eat. Cut my portions too. My goal is a meal at the beginning of my day, a piece of fruit in the middle, and a second meal at the end of the day. I had chicken wings, veggies, and peaches. When I got up, I had a banana. I’m going to try not to eat until a few hours before bedtime, and then I’ll have noodle soup and Vienna’s.

I’m still hesitant to lose weight, even if I could do so easily enough and keep it off because I worry about how it may affect how my meds affect me, as I’ve said before. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt me to try to lose a few pounds.

My third session with Helen was about finding a “safe” place. That’s a place you create in your mind be it a beach, the woods, a desert, or whatever. I’m to go there when I’m feeling anxious and she also wants me to get in the habit of going to “Rainbow Beach” at the beginning and end of my day.

I also read her Aly’s letter.

From here, we’re going to go through a timeline of the events that were the most traumatic for me. My childhood, what happened in Arizona, and the 3 most terrifying moments of my Cali life.

If I’m still on the Do Not Call list, why are the sales calls back again? I’m not getting half a dozen to a dozen a day, but I’m getting more than I have been.

We just got a pack of lighters and then I found I had a couple in one of the desk drawers. I gotta start taking inventory of stuff because I just can’t remember shit. The smaller the place, the harder it is to find things too. I’ve been wanting to arrange stuff anyway, now that we’ve been settled in. When a miracle happens and I have energy and no pain, I want to rearrange the stuff in the bathrooms, kitchen hutch/white cabinet drawers, my closet, and the desk drawers.