Oh, my God, I’ve already been here 14 days! It feels like it’s only been a week. I guess I can say I am disappointed in myself for not writing daily. I must keep up on it and find time to write daily. Now I’m bound to forget little things here and there that’ll add up to quite a bit. There’s so much to say and I have been keeping notes of stuff I’ll want to write about so I don’t forget them. However, in the days to follow, I’m sure I’ll remember bits and pieces of things to write about. I only wish I had a table to do my writing at.

Backing up to my last few days at Natchaug, now. I was there from May 24th to June 5th and I flew here on June 9th.

I moved into my own 1-bedroom studio last Monday, the 15th.

As I was at the tail end of the previous journal I mentioned a fight between Lindsay and I. It turned out to be so funny and we were always joking about it afterward. Lindsay was like me when she’d go off. Not off on herself or others, but verbally, I mean. She did that 2 or 3 times and it never upset me as I’m the same way and that’s my method of getting it out. It avoids doing other really dumb stuff you’ll really regret. Most people can’t deal with that, but I could fully understand where she was coming from.

I had gone off one morning on a staff member high on power-play which I already wrote about in my last journal. Lindsay was sitting on her bed when I came in yelling about that staff member and Lindsay threatened me if I continued to bitch. Well, that did it and I jumped up and yelled, “Come on! Maybe that’s exactly what I need!”

She goes, “No. I’m not gonna go to prison for putting little people through the wall.”

I said, “You won’t go to prison. You’ll go to the hospital cuz I’ll fucking slaughter you.”

Then at that point, she said, “Oh, just let it out. This is stupid.”

I said, “Yeah, it is stupid cuz I always liked you.” She said she liked me too, then we burst out laughing. She was kind enough, though, to move into Bertie’s room when Bertie’s roommate moved out. That gave me a little more space.

When Dad came to see me he constantly was asking questions about Andy and Arizona. I knew at that point that I was finally winning Mom and Dad over as people don’t usually ask so many questions unless they’re very seriously considering something. At least my parents don’t. After we discussed how expensive New England is, my asthma and allergies, that horrible project, me missing my best friend and there being nothing for me there, it was time. I knew I had finally won. Dad said he might call Andy but I speeded things up by calling Andy who called Dad at my place. Andy called Mom at Dad’s request too. It is cool knowing Andy’s already been here for 15 months. That way he knows his way around and what it’s like here. I can understand Mom and Dad feeling more comfortable with that, rather than us both coming here together for our first time. Andy has visited here before. He’s also been to California. I’ve never been past Texas.

Dad packed up everything I own. All but the furniture was shipped to me by UPS. I don’t miss my old ugly furniture. When you’re as miserable as I was, material things no longer matter. No, not in a place like that. My waterbed got to be a royal pain in the ass.

The NHA sent me a check for $100. Wow. With all I went through there physically and mentally, they oughta have paid me much much more. I never ever saw Barbara or the rest of her family again. I noticed that the 4 times or so I was at that dump, they weren’t home. Coincidence? Nope. Dad and Tammy were afraid I’d jump all over her. Well, I’m not out of their lives completely. I’ve got letters for Barbara, Debbie, and I wish I could send crazy letters to Maria, but I don’t know her last name. Oh well, Maria and the rest of Oakwood Knoll will surely hear all about the letters from Barbara and Deb. I’ll always have mixed emotions about the few people I knew back in those damn projects. On one hand, they’re very nice. On the other hand, they’re stupidly and dangerously gutsy. They talk too much and there’s a price to be paid for that. A very annoying price such as very strange letters. The beepers are taking care of them which I’ll explain later.

All my furniture was taken to Tammy’s house. It was sold off in a tag sale. I really appreciated Tammy and Dad for helping me and being there when I really needed them. At times it was hard to show it especially early in the morning. And it was a zoo there with all the adults, kids and animals. We all know I’m far from used to that. Tammy cried over the phone while I was still in Natchaug as I am the last family member to go. The last one really associated with her. Lisa was very upset. Becky and Sarah are still too young to get what was going on. We promised to write to each other and I’ve already sent a few letters to Lisa, Tammy and my parents. I’ve received a card from Mom and letters from Lisa and Dad.

I’ve spoken with Bob, Fran and Nervous. When I get a phone which may not be for a few weeks, I’ll call or write to Jessie. I’m sure Jessie will accept a collect call from me. According to Andy, though, you can’t make collect calls or use a long-distance carrier access code. It’s $5 a month to block your line. This is what they do here for a year if you’re a new customer unless you can pay the $170 deposit. The deposits here are bad, but once you get beyond that it’s worth it as everything is so much cheaper here. There’s a $46 installation charge here but you can get it waived if you’re low income, over 65 or have a medical condition. The phone company sent me a form I’m sending to my asthma doctor in Norwich. He’ll send it back to me to give to them. I hope it won’t take too long till I get a phone.

Andy lent me the $150 electric deposit. That was nice. He makes excellent money at Denny’s.

I still have a million other things to write about but I am beat.

I am still not quite ready to go to sleep. I told Andy to knock on my window and wake me up at noon. If I fall asleep by 4:00, I’ll have gotten 8 hours of sleep.