It was great to see Tom earlier, who got a raise! We agreed we’d meet for a half-hour on Tuesdays and an hour on Thursdays. Meanwhile, I’ll write Helen and tell her not to bother visiting and that I’ll contact her when I get out.

He promised, at my request, to get poles up with No Trespassing signs, since we still don’t have exterior fencing. No Trespassing signs are good to have regardless of whether or not you have freeloader/media problems. He says the media won’t come to the house. Let’s hope not. I couldn’t call the cops and have them there in 5 minutes, not that I’d trust them, anyway.

Speaking of pigs, Tom’s sure that whether or not the black bitch works for the courts, she knew the pig (Jerry O) and he told her what to say. “Haven’t you figured that out yet?” he asked.

No. Truthfully, I haven’t wanted to remember that horrid day, and when I was in court I did everything I could not to look at her to keep me from either throwing up right then and there or ripping the snot out of her. Thinking back, though, to what little I was forced to see of them, they did seem pretty chummy and that was quite a speech from such a stupid fuck. She wouldn’t have brains enough to come up with bullshit like that on her own, even though she’s a natural liar. She had to move twice, so she claimed. Why? Because she harassed her other neighbors too, and they ran her out? She never did associate with whites which I got the impression from the get-go she hated, so her fellow black pig pal makes sense. I’m sure he gave her our address, too. I dare her to show up on our property, and truthfully – I hope she does! Anyway, I knew she had to have some kind of connection in order to get such bullshit pushed so far, besides just being black.

“And sweetheart, you’re not here for the journals. You’re here for a letter you were supposed to have sent.”

This is when I was like – a letter?! What letter?! Then we were talking about the stuff the public defender showed us 5 minutes before sentencing that we’d never seen before, remembering the way he tried to hide some of it.

“He was in on it! That mother-fucker was in on it.”

Tom nodded.

I think I was then I vowed never to trust another human being again.

Just how do you expose corrupt pigs, though? Why is it always OK to fuck over Jodi S and get away with it? Is there any justice in this world when it comes to people shitting on me? Is there anyone anywhere that ever fucked me over that’ll end up paying for it? How sweet of God to allow these freeloaders the right to victimize me for years at just a few feet away, then to send them some piggy friend to help do it all over again from a distance. What God’s allowed to be done to me is completely unforgivable. I will never forgive him at this point after 35 years of bullshit. What? Was I their slave master in a former life or something? Is that why he’s punishing me with these black assholes? He really wanted these people to fuck me over good. And get away with it, too. How many more years must this go on before I’m either driven to suicide or driven to run? God, I wish there was a way to wire someone and get that pig to spill his guts on how he coached the fucking black bitch!

All charges were dropped against Lisa, who went to court today and then home. According to Deanna, she told her that she was in for having her 11-year-old niece pose in lingerie for her boyfriend.

Anyway, before she left, Myra tried to pit her against me, but Lisa told her I haven’t said anything mean to her.

Lisa told me she saw Tina, who said to say hi to me, and that she and Bob are having a great time as pen pals.

Espi was on today. I missed her and was so glad she was on. She’s definitely one of my favorites. She and I would be chatting and laughing every other walk. I told her I wanted her for a mom in my next life. She said, “That’d be fine with me, kiddo.”

Kiddo? She’s only 15 years older than me in this life.

Myra wasn’t too happy with her because of the way she sided with me.

I filled Espi in on all the shit that had been going on. She said it made her comfortable that I was alone.

Me too. It’s a shame it can’t stay that way for another 60 days. She also told me Nancy didn’t need to be here, she’s a spoof (I know), and that she’ll probably be gone tomorrow, referring to her as a ringleader.

The phony cunt kissed up to Myra so she’d stop harassing her and so she could join in on the taunts and threats against me, but Myra isn’t buying it anymore. As Mary pointed out to her – all this shit started when Nancy entered the picture. Get it? Nancy + Nancy = trouble.

She came kicking at my door on her hour out but I ignored her, pretending not to hear her because of the radio.

The second time she came kicking, I munched, savoring a candy bar as she was going upstairs, rubbing in what she was missing. She goes, “You’re sick. You really are.”

Sicker than you know, bitch!

Kahn was escorting today. I don’t know why she escorted me from my cell and not M’s entrance, but she did. She seemed like she was in a bad mood. I asked when she’d be back in M Dorm and she said, “Hopefully never.”

I wonder why? Did something happen the last time she was here?

Right after Tom left, I ran into Mary, who had also had a visit. Right away she told me she had nothing to do with what was going on and I assured her that I knew that. I know she, Brandie, Lisa and the people above me have nothing to do with it. It’s Myra, Mindy, Nancy, Peaches and Carol that are causing the trouble. I let Mary know I still like her and always will.

Mary and I were discussing the situation with Hann when we got back. I told her how Myra threatened to cut my tongue out, and Hann goes, “Did you ask her how she plans to do that with no cutting materials?”

I had to laugh at that one!

Hann also pointed out that they were all watching us talk (referring to those in 1 and 4), but I didn’t give a shit.

Mary defended me concerning Nancy, saying how she’s been causing a lot of problems, is using Myra, etc. Mary also said she’d talk some “sense” into Myra, who leaves for prison in about a month, and get her to shut up and quit her childish, asinine antics, but as I told Mary, I don’t give a shit what Myra says/does. I’m not the one with any deep, dark secrets to hide.

As soon as I was locked down after telling Hann some jokes and after she asked me what happened to the little old lady (Ida) who used to complain about everything, Myra and Carol started in with their shit. It may’ve been Peaches too, but as always, it was mostly Myra. So, that was my cue to remind everybody of her wonderful deeds and she was not happy about that at all, frantically yelling, “I don’t want to hear it, I don’t want others to hear it, there’s a new girl here!”

Some anorexic-looking girl who looks like Pat Benatar took Lisa’s place in 4.

Myra was furious earlier with Espi for not sending me to A Tower for the things I was saying. They threatened to grieve her and Espi was like, “Go ahead.” Myra knew Espi was on my side and she also knew that Espi knew I’d done nothing wrong or illegal (she mentioned that book she dreads so much again, spilling out the truth about her that she’s so afraid to face).

I was also right about the toilet flushing getting to her. Whenever she’d yell up to Mindy, I’d start flushing it because she’s so loud and that’s so rude of her, too. She went off on me about it, then broke down in tears after I reminded her yet again that if she wanted me to shut up about her and her dirty little crimes that bad, she knew what to do.

A little while later, Mary called to me and asked me to come to the vent. I did, and she said Myra had something to say to me. Myra then pleaded with me not to mention her kids, she’s not like that, and if I had nothing to do with what Nancy said, I could just say so.

I did say so days ago, but at that point, I was like yeah, yeah, whatever, I wasn’t publishing a book, and I’d be willing to drop it and quit yelling if she’d shut up.

So now my enemies aren’t my enemies anymore and I have mixed emotions about that. It’s nice to have a little more peace and quiet around here, but there goes my extra Keep Out sign that was on the big cell’s doors.