Yesterday was Kate Jackson’s
70th birthday. Jaclyn Smith is a few years older.
Tom said several people are
quitting at work and going to work at some other warehouse but doesn’t know
what the pay is. The thing is that they were already making a lot less than he
makes. It would really be nice if he could get a job working graves because it
would make doing things in the daytime easier, like going to appointments, but
I can’t believe any other place would start him off at $19 an hour. But if it
was third shift then being an American company wouldn’t matter. It would suck
if he couldn’t get as many days off but at least he wouldn’t have to take days
off for appointments.
The water was off yesterday
although I went to bed right before they turned it off. The fucking water is
going off again on Thursday. Damn, am I sick of this place! I hate to think of
being here another 5-6 years. I can just imagine all the projects I’ll be in
for. Never lived anywhere before where I dreaded the possibility of them
working in the road or cutting trees down with their thunderously loud saws and
wood chippers. I also can’t believe all the planes here. There have definitely
been way more commercial planes. Early yesterday morning it was one after
another and I’ve heard several since I’ve been up. There’s no getting peace
here even at night.
I wish noise was the worst of
my problems but unfortunately I was very anxious yesterday. It was almost to
the point where I dreaded the idea of him leaving for work. Stopping the
Amberen again after reading that they recommend stopping after 90 days and then
if you have symptoms doing another 90 days. It’s a mega longshot but there is a
very very slim chance that it could be contributing to my anxiety even though I
wouldn’t think a blend of vitamins and minerals would do that. I suppose
anything is possible even though I doubt it has anything to do with it. So far
today I’m calm but it’s a little early in my day. That’s usually a midday thing
so I’m still about 3 hours away from any potential trouble. Going to be taking
my magnesium, vitamin D and multivitamin in a few minutes. If I get unusually
anxious I may stop the magnesium. A few people did say it actually wound them
up. Can’t say if the Lio had anything to do with it or not. Looking at my
notes, it seems I’ve had 5 anxious days out of the last 15. As I may have said
before, I’m beginning to think that if I was meant to fix this then I wouldn’t
have had it for so long to begin with.
The glasses came today and
I’m still not sure if progressives are right for me. I hate how you have to
look through a specific spot in the lens in order to see certain things.
Sometimes I wonder if I should go back to traditional bifocals even though I would
lose mid-range that way. They’re awfully loose too, so they’ll have to be
tightened. The round raspberry frames look better on me than the rectangular
purple frames but the purples are only for the computer anyway.
Norma replied saying she
hopes Tammy and I work things out, sisterhood is important, her sister left her
and her brother, etc. She said she’ll keep my message between us and hasn’t
spoken with Tammy recently but will call tomorrow (today) to see what she can
find out.
I would still think that if
she was really dying, Norma and I would’ve been notified. Plus, Tammy’s been on
Facebook pretty much daily. If you were dying, would you really be on Facebook
every day?
I think I’m still a bit too
nice, too caring, and too forgiving. Meaning that I know I should simply ignore
Tammy regardless of biology if Norma confirms she’s not dying after she calls
her today. Saying you want to die, are thinking about dying, feel like you’re
dying, or think you might die at a specific time is one thing. Saying you
“won’t be around long” is another. That’s low. That’s just really low. That’d
be great for her and the girls if she wasn’t checking out anytime soon but I’m
definitely done with her, without guilt or shame, if I learn she lied about
dying.
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