I typed this to Larry:

What I’m about to tell you may sound strange, but I believe in communication, so people understand each other better. It may piss you off, but I hope not and I’ll take my chance cuz it’s your right to know. You mentioned giving Jenny my number and I don’t know if you’ve given it to her or whether or not she said she’d call or not. Anyway, after we hung up and the idea had a chance to sink in, I thought about it and decided I don’t think it’s a wise idea for us to have any contact with each other. If I ran into her on a visit there or she called before you got this letter, fine, I can be cool about it and that’s no problem. Before I get into why let me back up. I’m the first one to admit I was a bitch who did some raunchy things, but stuff was also done to me. I’m living proof that people can change, am not the same person I used to be, and I’m sure she’s learned a lot like I have since we were last friends. She is a good person, I don’t hate her, and I wish her all the luck in the world. I hope she has a great life. My attitude for a year or so after our friendship ended and she became friends with you was that she was a traitor. Then I came to realize that everyone has a right to pick their own friends. I made a promise to myself that I would like very much to keep. You’re the only one that walked out of my life that I’ve taken back into my life. Of course, if you were to kiss me farewell again, that’s it forever. I lost you both at the most critical time of my life when I needed you the most and was going through major transitions in life. Yes, you were right, I still succeeded and did what I had to do, even though I was terrified of people, dumped them left and right figuring they’d dump me and was broke and starving, scraping pennies and on food stamps for the longest time. I guess what it basically comes down to is I feel like you feel about Tammy. She’s a good person, I wish her well, but there’s nothing to say to each other at this point. I hope you’ll understand and respect my feelings like I will about you and Tammy. I just wouldn’t know what to say. Go ahead and read this to her or show this to her if you want and that way she’s not left hanging, but truthfully, I can’t picture her wanting to talk to me either.

Later...

Well, today’s the day two years ago in 1993 when I became a dancer. An exotic one, anyhow.

Yesterday morning I couldn’t fall asleep till around 9:30 and Tom got me up at 3:30. Boy, was I tired!

Anyway, good news about my doctor’s appointment. His exact words to me were, “Jodi, I have good news for you. The skin graft is healing.”

He said he was very shocked and called it a miracle. He says it’s still wise to remain pessimistic, though, as there’s still a slight chance I’ll need another skin graft. Oh yeah? I intend to surprise him on this one. I’ve had about 18-19 operations in my life and I don’t care to make it an even 20.

As far as getting into the letter I did for Larry - well - there’s not much to really get into. Those are my true feelings. I have nothing to say to her and have no desire to be either local or long-distance friends with her. I highly doubt this will piss Larry off, but if it does - too bad. I really hope he gets this letter before she calls, even though I’m 99% sure she won’t call. What would she want to say to me as well? I’m sure our feelings are mutual (mine and Jenny’s).

At around 7:00 last night I fell asleep till 11:00. I sure didn’t expect to be able to do that, but I sure needed it. Obviously, no one came or went during those hours from next door.

I talked with Andy and then Andy with his friend Goofy on the line. Andy went to bed at 6 AM.

Tom did a little shopping yesterday. In the back room, there are two sets of double windows and a single one. The one in between the back room and the room where the dryer is doesn’t need blinds, so I’m gonna leave it bare. It has translucent contact paper on it which won’t look funny. Plus, I can easily decorate it. He got cameo rose and slate blue for the double set directly in back, but forgot blinds for the single side window which he’ll pick up today. Probably today we’ll wash the windows and put up the blinds. I can’t wait to junk the old ugly curtains that have been there for no doubt many years.

He also got a toothbrush holder and a razor holder which I installed. Lastly, clear spray paint for my wall art.

Oh, I almost forgot. There are two leaks in the roof over the back room, so he got stuff to fix it. Luckily the roof over the rest of the house is new and in good condition.

I have 6 letters going out today to my parents, Kim, Bob, Minnie and Alex.