Yesterday Andy told me he wanted to call me and that, “You’ll never guess in a million years who I just got off the phone with.” 

I was frustrated at first because I hate it when people don’t just come out and tell me things. I jokingly said to him, “If it’s Stevie, I don’t care.” I’d be happy for him, but he knows I’m not into celebrities like he is. 

He said if it was, he’d have already called me. My next guess was Shelley, but then I realized he wouldn’t get that excited if it was her since he’s pretty much gotten over her and her lack of interest in being his Godmother. 

Then he gave me a hint by quoting a “famous” line from the edits I’d make of our days as prank callers. It still didn’t ring a bell, but my next guess was Fran’s brother Ricky. I guessed correctly. 

I once wasn’t very picky and choosy when it came to friends, unfortunately, and didn’t do a very good job of filtering out those who weren’t quite right in the head. I was too tolerant and too forgiving. One of my “friends” was an older guy we dubbed “Nervous,” and a guy just a few years older than me named Fran. Both had emotional issues and both were outcasts, only Nervous was actually intelligent and reliable. He, unlike Fran, was independent and owned a car. Fran always lived in group homes. He was last living in an apartment where people like him lived and received daily visitors from their social workers. The social workers basically took care of everything… where they lived, where they worked, etc. 

Nervous died of a heart attack in his 50s in the mid-90s, and I cut ties with Fran not long afterward. The final straw was when he billed long-distance phone calls to Tom and I. I’d basically had it with his lies and the grief he would give me. He’d steal little things from my apartment when I lived in Massachusetts where Andy currently lives, and well, there were just too many things that had added up to show that Fran wasn’t worth my time and that I had outgrown him. We all do stupid shit when we’re young, but most of us move on and mature while others don’t, and I knew Fran would always be Fran no matter what. 

While I was still living back east, Ricky would join Andy, Fran and I on our prank-calling adventures whenever he would visit a friend. Ricky had a very fierce, commanding voice that would make for the perfect DJ. Using three-way, we would have him call and pick on Nervous. 

Out of curiosity, I looked Fran up online as I do with almost everybody I’ve ever known at one point or another, and found he died in 2011. 

So Andy wanted to chat live since we hadn’t done so since November. Even though I didn’t see the point since we’re in touch online every day, I know it’s not as easy for him to type, so he called at 8pm my time only to get a busy signal. My first thought was that he dialed wrong since as Tom said, cells don’t do busy signals. Then he got a message saying all circuits were busy. Finally, I called him and the call went through just fine. 

It turns out that Ricky has been attending his NA meetings after 27 years of sobriety. They would chat here and there and he’s had his number for a while but hadn’t called him. The guy he wanted to sponsor him isn’t available, so he’s considering asking Ricky. Well, they got to talking on the phone when Ricky started mentioning his dead brother Fran. That’s when Andy started to connect the dots in his mind and ask Ricky his last name. 

Then Andy said, “OMG, what if I told you I have you on tape making prank phone calls from back in the late '80s?” 

At that point, Andy explained how he and I once knew Fran and the calls we would all make, and Ricky remembered everything. He did say, however, he didn’t want to hear them because he’s not like that anymore. This is no surprise. Most people do change after 30 years or more. Ricky, whose voice has changed a bit over the years, has been staying out of trouble and he’s an advocate for the homeless now. 

He was the one who found Fran dead in bed, who apparently died of natural causes. Even though I knew I would never again want to resume our so-called “friendship,” I was always curious as to how he died. He had high blood pressure and diabetes, and he was obese. Andy said he didn’t feel it was best to tell me a friend died online and that was part of why he wanted to talk live. 

“What friend?” I asked him with surprise. Despite his memory issues, which are both serious and annoying, I was surprised he didn’t remember that A, I cut ties with him years ago, and B, I was the one who told him a few years ago that Fran died. 

Andy also told me that before Fran died he confessed to his brother about being gay. I clearly remember him being genuinely interested in some girls, though I always wondered if he could be bisexual. He was probably attracted to guys more often than he was to girls, but it was much harder to hook up with the same sex back then. It wasn’t as accepted, and the only place to meet was gay bars. 

Nonetheless, Ricky assured Fran that he was still his brother and that he didn’t care about his sexuality. The only problem he had was when he stayed over at Fran’s place one night and Fran had a couple of guys over. Ricky slept on the couch and he awoke one night to find Fran’s guests getting it on on the floor right near him. I guess this made Ricky uncomfortable and he nearly got stabbed that night. 

Anyway, we fixed my phone today. It somehow lost connection with the network and so we had to reset it. 

I’ve had a sore throat all day and I don’t know why. Hot beverages and lozenges don’t seem to help, but my body’s kick-ass immune system should fight it off soon enough.