No, I didn’t win an art print. The rude bitch sent an email to everyone apologizing for the way she worded her message. What the fuck do you expect, though, when you put “YOU WON” in the subject header? Then she goes on to congratulate you for winning Susanna, and I thought that was the name of the print. I can’t stand to enter contests anymore. First of all, I almost never win because of all the competition and secondly, I’m tired of getting congratulated on tons of other people’s wins as if I helped or made them win somehow.

The strangest thing happened before we left after setting the bombs off. I noticed the water tank sounded funny. Well, it was because the water was off! At first I was like, oh no, not this shit again! Why does everything we run from have to follow us? But it was only off for a second. It was making this boiling/hissing sound because it was so low on water at the moment.

I knew Mrs. Twenties would get a kick out of that one, so I told her about it. She says the water has only been off once since we’ve been gone, and that it’s been mostly quiet. That is SO unfair but so typical! I’m happy for her, but it totally figures that things get better after we leave. Tom says he remembers the water not being off for as long as six months, but the longest I remember is two months.

So we set the bombs off and had four hours to kill. So glad our typical Florida weather is back! Traffic was loud and obnoxious as usual, and it’s kind of funny because with all the control freaks running this state, you would think that loud engines, boom car stereos, and people smoking in public would be things they would be dying to control instead of stupid shit.

Our first stops were to Walgreens to pick up my nail prescription and then to Burger King for burgers and fries. Then it was off to Walmart where I got a pair of colorful tie-dye sneakers without laces or Velcro. They’re stretchy with memory foam soles. They might make my feet a bit warm without socks, but I wanted something I could slip into when I didn’t want to wear sneakers or sandals. They’re a size 4 in girls.

I also got new nail clippers and white distilled vinegar. I grabbed some pink Moscato at Walgreens.

We were going to go to Sam’s Club next, but it was so crowded that we decided to skip it. So we passed a salon and I got my hair trimmed. I should have had her take a little more length off, but she did a good job nonetheless.

We grabbed a few things from Publix and then headed home. We still had some time to kill and we had to air the place out of it first, so when I saw the guy across the street out fiddling with the motorcycle, even though he hadn’t started it yet, I decided that was a good opportunity to introduce myself and find out what I could. The guy’s name is Darren, the name I saw in the phone book. So he doesn’t rent the place, but owns it and lives there with his girlfriend Carrie. He’s leaving at the end of March because he has to work for a few months before he can retire. Unfortunately, his absence wasn’t a regular thing but him just not able to get across the border.

I thanked him for not riding the motorcycle too often since it’s loud and he laughed and said, “Oh yeah, you’ll hear it.”

As in he understands that it’s loud or that I should expect to hear it more? I hope I don’t hear it more, but I do appreciate him not revving it. He didn’t even start the motor until he backed out onto the street.

I asked if he was going to come down full-time and he said no. I said that’s understandable because Canada is a better country than the US anyway. He laughed and said he didn’t know about that.

I got a Tom Ford Ombre Leather perfume sample in the mail. It’s a neutral scent with patchouli as its top note, and it smells great.