I haven’t heard from my sister yet. I hope to soon. Hope I start getting some letters soon, too.

No one from the office has harassed me, so I hope they got the message.

Today is an extremely windy day. Very much with a feeling of fall. It sort of feels like at home during the beginning of September in MA and CT. They’ve got to be absolutely freezing. This is what I’ve heard. Cuz it’s so dry and breezy today, it is a little bit chilly. I’ve shut my windows.

Today they vote for president. I never vote as they’re all quacks anyway. I believe Bill Clinton will win and that’s OK with me cuz he seems to be the most liberal of them all.

Last night, after dinner Andy and I went to South Mountain. I’ve never ever witnessed any scenery so beautiful. Just when I thought you could see forever on Squaw Peak and Camelback Mountain. Well, you can see forever and ever on top of this one. It was gorgeous and breathtaking and I wish my family could see this. You could see thousands of lights throughout the valley. The Valley of the Sun, they call it. It took 15 minutes just to drive up this mountain and my ear would pop going up and coming down. It was extremely windy up there, yet he and I did our own things. He did an interview while I was with “Saundra.”

I met a butch yesterday as I was on my way into the laundry room. God, I wish I could settle and not give a damn about looks. She seemed friendly enough, but she sure did shock me and scare me by asking me where I work. They usually don’t bother asking this, but I said I did little odds and ends. She says she works in the records department at Baptist Hospital. Also, she’s from Maine and she’s 29 and has been in AZ for 18 years and at this complex for almost a year.

I only told her the state I’m from, my age, and how long I’ve been here.

She said she’s been to two gay bars I’ve been to, however, she doesn’t know I’m gay. She may sense it, though, as you can sense each other out at times. Low-income people, too. We sense each other out. The only other thing she asked was what kind of music I like.

This girl’s not the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen, but she’s between plain and ugly. She could’ve been thinking one of two things, but I don’t know for sure. One thing she could very well think is that I’m too feminine. The other is that maybe she did like me as the very few fems out there usually go for butches and butches prefer fems. There are also lots of butch couples cuz they have no choice when 98% of gay women are butches. The other reason she may have liked me is cuz God would have it that way and be sure to send me the ones I’m not attracted to. God forbid if I ever run into her again (and I hope not to make things easier), should I say no? Should I remain celibate forever or start settling? But settle for no men and certainly not ultra-fat or ugly women is what I would do if I did settle.

Later...

I am now watching the presidential campaign. Never before has it interested me. Usually two months after we get a new president, I’m like, “By the way, who’s the new president?” I’m for Clinton cuz he’s more liberal and for gay rights. Also for a woman’s right to choose whether or not to have an abortion. The reason why I’m pro-choice is cuz of rape, incest and the life of the mother. There are enough unwanted kids in this world with not enough loving people to adopt them. Also, why put the mother through the emotional and physical shit when she doesn’t want a kid? And this world is way too overpopulated. Like I said, they’re all quacks, but Republicans are too narrow-minded and want all people to follow a certain set of rules. Clinton’s gonna win by a landslide. Now I’m waiting to hear about local issues and propositions.

It is nice to finally be doing OK for a change. My electric bill’s gonna be dirt cheap and my phone bill will only be $30. I have a little over $200 after deducting my rent, so that leaves me enough cash. Then, there’ll be my mom’s $50.

Later...

Clinton won, luckily, and the government can’t step into the abortion issue. All abortions for any reason are legal.

Andy called a little while ago. He’s going to some friend’s house that he works with.

According to what he’s told me and what I’ve seen, that Stephanie is one major undependable airhead.

I still have many things I want to do.

I want to finish the drawing of Tammy, Bill and the girls. Perhaps this can be their Chanukah present since I can’t afford to send anything. I would like to send at least $10 to Tammy for all the collect calls I’ve made to her. It’s not much, but it’s something.

So anyway, here are all the little projects I want to do:

1. Finish the drawing.
2. Eventually see about photocopying other drawings I’ve done to send to Tammy.
3. Editing.
4. Letter writing.
5. Continue reading back through my journals.
6. Write stories?

I’m still not sure as far as stories go. If I do, should I type it? Or should I write it in a journal? I’ll just wait and see if I get any for my b-day. That’s what I want most as I have an electric typewriter now. All I really need is a full-length mirror and I only need one, whereas I can never have too many journals.

Later...

While I’m watching Hunter I’m gonna write about a series of wacko dreams I had last night. They sure were strange and I dreamt about bits and pieces of different things that made no sense. In one dream I remember seeing the younger Linda Ronstadt in person. I don’t believe we spoke, and I don’t know where this was and what the occasion was. It didn’t look too much like Linda, but somehow I just knew it was her. She was talking to someone else whose face I couldn’t see. I have no idea what about.

Then I dreamt I was in a big house belonging to a big family. The family wasn’t home, but I knew they were on their way home. Somehow I knew Rosemarie was gonna be on TV. Why? Who knows. I thought to myself how I wanted to quickly grab my scrapbook of pictures cuz I wanted them to see what she looks like. The family came home before I could do so.

Guess I’ll finish with the rest of the dreams after I watch TV. Or during commercials, I can do more writing. I just don’t feel like taping it.