I take back every worst fear and false assumption I had yesterday about what my endo would tell me during today’s visit. My endo rocks! I totally had her all wrong. I thought she was going to be all or nothing and basically tell me to either stay on 88 mcg and suffer the INHUMANE side effects or get lost. Again, these side effects weren’t annoying, they were downright terrifying. I really felt like I was going to die. What is it with me misreading people anyway? First I thought Bob was mad at me and then I thought the second to last time I saw my endo that she might not like me for some reason or was upset with me. I guess they were just having a bad day that day. 

Okay, to make a long story as short as I can being that it’s been a long day for me and I’m getting tired… traffic was a bitch and she was running behind as usual, but in my mind, I was thinking that was the last time I’d be there anyway. I had Tom in the exam room with me for support because I was nervous. 

Then in she came, commenting on how colorful I looked as she sat down at her desk. I then told her what I’ve experienced the last few weeks or so with most of my suffering being between the 13th - 29th and she listened with concern. Instead of being told, “Look, this only happens to you. Either suffer the side effects or see someone else,” she said, “Wow. I guess 75 is it for you then.” 

I was so relieved to hear this and I even told her how much she rocks, LOL. I reminded her that while I respect and understand her concern with numbers, I am still a person after all, with real feelings, and she said she wasn’t just a number person at all, so that was a huge relief. Comparing her to my old endo is like comparing night and day. When the shit hit the fan with the old one she told me to either come in that day or not for 3 months AND to keep taking my meds the same way. Now THAT was fucked up. 

See, my sister (gotta love her concern when she “came down hard on me” in a VM) was worried that lowering my dose would be dangerous, but as the doctor explained, it’s not dangerous at all. I don’t think I shared my last lab results with Tammy, but apparently, my T4 had nudged itself up a bit too much “overflowing the tank,” as the doc put it. The month or so that I was on 88 took my full tank and pretty much overflowed it. The 75s just weren’t getting the tank full fast enough, but now my tank is full on 75s and this will be my forever dose. I have no obvious hypothyroidism symptoms and haven’t for many months, and am not in any danger on 75s. 

The only two things we need to check next are my cholesterol, which I told her my big sister confirmed does indeed run in the family, and she’s also going to do an adrenal gland test on me. Funny too, cuz I wondered about that, even though she doubts there’s anything wrong with it. God, I hope not! 

She said that the only thing that didn’t make sense was how fast I started feeling better after reverting back to 75s. Well, it hasn’t been an instantaneous thing. The side effects have been slowly tapering off and should take two weeks to dissipate completely. That’s how long a dose increase/decrease takes to change your T4. I had a little heart racing earlier, but nothing like last Thursday. By the weekend I should be fine. 

I’m just glad she didn’t have an all-or-nothing attitude and get everything screwed up for me like the old doc did. I’d have hated to have to find someone new, as much as I hate her location, and I’d feel like shit AND be in danger of a stroke, heart attack, or coma if I quit my meds altogether. Not to mention gain a million pounds, carry enough water to fill a pool, and forget my own damn name half the time. 

But she went over the check-list with me and I’m not suffering fatigue, hair loss, or kind of coldness and dry skin like I had before. I’m surprised my appetite’s down, though. Usually, the more you stimulate the metabolism, the more calories you burn and the hungrier you are. My weight was down, too. I think it’s the years of exercising and naturally rapid pulse that have kept me from becoming seriously obese. I do watch the calorie intake too, whether I’m eating healthy or not. 

Again, she rocks and I love and appreciate my sister for her concern and reminding me how she too, has side effects from some of her many medications, but as I assured her if the side effects had been manageable, I’d have managed them. I love spending half my time alone. So when I say I’m scared to be alone, something’s wrong. But now that my T4 will be set right again, the TSH doesn’t matter as much and should remain on the high end of normal. 

Today my BIL turned 65. I hope he and Tammy both enjoyed their day today. 

I have more to write about, but I’m both busy and tired, so I’ll get to it some other time. I’m just glad I can rest easy now. Hopefully, there’ll be no more health issues for a very long time to come!