My lymph nodes have me worried again. The one in my groin got so sore when I was visiting Dixie that I had to take a couple of Ibuprofen as soon as I got home. I can still feel a bulge in my neck as well. After I get my fillings done on the 30th and Tom sees that that doesn’t fix things like he suspects it will, then I’ll make a decision as to whether or not I think I should get into Doc A sooner.

It could still be a nodule in my neck and my groin could be a pulled muscle, ligament or tendon but then what about the soreness I sometimes get in the side of my boob where another lymph node is located? You have hundreds of lymph nodes all over the place, but I guess those are the main spots along with under the jaw. Those have yet to give me any shit.

Swollen lymph nodes usually mean you have an infection or some kind of inflammation but I recently had a round of antibiotics so that leaves one other possibility and I really hope to hell that isn’t it! Lymphoma is the last thing I want to have to deal with! Really, I’m tired of one health issue after another! I would definitely like to know what the hell it is but that doesn’t mean I want to treat it if it requires treatment. If there is a health curse on me, I’ve got to stop giving in to it. I can’t keep running around treating this and treating that. So far, I’m not in the kind of excruciating pain I was in when my tooth got infected, and of course I don’t want to spend so much time and money constantly having to fix myself, so I’ll decide what to do in a couple of weeks.

They finally made masks mandatory in Cali as they should have months ago everywhere until a vaccine is available. The overall US death count is going down, though, since those most susceptible are likely dead by now. Mandatory or not, Tom and I are smart enough not to go anywhere unnecessarily and to wear masks when we do. Just ordered an adorable reusable mask with a photo of a guinea pig sitting next to some yellow pansies.

Dixie called late in the evening and said she was sitting out front watering and asked if I wanted to come down and chat with her. Diane was already in bed. So I went down and while she flooded the yard and made it hard to hear her soft voice over the water running and other noise, she told me she was woken by her motion sensor light a few weeks ago. Then she said she heard the sound of water dripping or something like that. Then, supposedly without seeing anyone, she became certain that someone decided to pee in her carport, so she called the police. The pigs said her hose was dripping and they thought that was it, but she says it was on the wrong side of the house.

Like someone is going to jump over the fence of a fancy gated community in the middle of the night just to pick one out of 500 carports to piss in? Somehow, I doubt that! I think she’s just losing it or has become incredibly paranoid in her old age. She doesn’t always remember things, switches subjects rapidly, and often forgets what the hell she’s talking about or was about to say, so I kind of doubt her story, LOL. It was still nice to see her.

Before she called, I could hear the annoying sound of a small plane or helicopter circling round and round. It was even louder when I went down to her place since we were outdoors, and we could see a helicopter circling around. We could also hear what I’m guessing were the cops talking through a loudspeaker, so I guess they were trying to catch someone. I can’t wait to get away from all these planes and helicopters! The commercials still haven’t been as bad and neither has traffic. But still, next year can’t come fast enough! Even Dixie agrees it’s noisy. I just hope the virus doesn’t hold us back or anything with my health! I don’t have any bad vibes right now, but something’s got to be setting my lymph nodes off if that’s what it is.

Dixie said she’s had soreness in her groin node before but again, I can’t always count on what she tells me.

She tells me she worries about having to go out with the virus still around and as I told her, I don’t understand why she’s going out for groceries. Why go out unnecessarily when she can get a $15 monthly subscription for unlimited free delivery as long as she gets at least $30 of stuff? So I gave her the link to the Walmart grocery store. We spend $400-$500 a month and that’s lower than the national norm.

Because she’s over 65 and so many restaurants are going out of business, she gets free meals delivered daily as well. But to go out grocery shopping is too risky.

Since Pinterest obviously doesn’t want its users to be able to download their boards for reasons I’ll never understand, I’ve been dragging pins into files on my computer one by one, a little at a time. Then I weed out the blurry ones. Quality images should look good even on a big screen.

Norma finally answered my message asking how often she gets woken up by thunder and she said she was used to it and that it rarely wakes her up. Why can’t I get used to sleeping through things???

And why can’t I have fun dreams more often? The kinds that inspire story ideas. It’s usually the same old depressing themes. Had a dream I couldn’t help but send an email or two to the corrupt pig-turned-family businessman. I don’t know what I said but I was suddenly worried that it may cause repercussions for me.

It seems there was some kind of legal dream last night as well (or yesterday in my case). I don’t know why I have these types of dreams so often when I haven’t done anything remotely illegal and I don’t intend to. My worst “crime” is not always agreeing with the majority on certain issues. Other than eventually sharing some journal excerpts with the termites (maybe), I don’t want to make trouble for anyone simply for fun or because they may not want anything to do with me.

But the fact that I’ve been a law-abiding citizen doesn’t explain why I have so many dreams revolving around legal issues and being stuck in strange “jails.” But then I guess not everything we dream about has to do with our real lives since I’ve had a few dreams where I was with my former PO, yet I never had an ounce of attraction for him in any way. So I don’t know. Maybe this shit is going on in other dimensions.

The weather has been hot and dry. I guess the pool is open now, yet we have no desire to go swimming. Who knows if we’ll ever swim in this state again?

Been having an anxious week. I was borderline on the 14th and 15th. I cut my pill on the 16th and was fine. Had mild anxiety the next day, cut my pill the next day and was borderline. Today I cut my waiting time in half and feel a little on edge now. Depending on how I feel tomorrow, I may skip Sunday’s dose altogether. If I’m right about it having to do with the medication building up in my system - and I’ve always thought that - then I really need to get more of it out of my system once and for all so I can feel better faster. Yeah, I knew it wasn’t gone forever and it never will be any more than my on-and-off TMJ pain will one day vanish forever right along with my extra weight or other things I’ve been dealing with for years.