Written just after midnight last night:

Just lying here knowing that sleep is going to elude me for several more hours despite being tired. I wonder how many hours of sleep I’ll get before that fucking truck wakes me up again that’s working on prepping for the new house. At least I think that’s what it was that woke me up the last time around. It was like a freight train blasting through the bedroom, even with the sound machines blaring.

A nurse was next door at 8:30 p.m. Pretty sure it was a nurse anyway. I saw her heading into their place with a bag of something. She was wearing a plastic shield. A nurse being there that late can’t be very good. They’ve also been having that navy SUV stay there overnight and I’ve seen Nancy’s car there every day.

Makes me think one of them is dying and I can’t help but remember, shortly after learning of Bob’s tumor, me saying to Tom, “I have a bad feeling about this. I just picture him gone by August and the house on the market by the end of the year.”

Well, it’s close enough to August but I don’t know which one is on their way out if that’s really the case. Maybe Virginia’s heart is failing, I don’t know. I’m not about to go over there and pry for information. It’s a sad situation either way. Both of them can’t have much longer to go. The selfish side of me worries about what we may end up with over there before we can get out of here.

I was telling Tom that if we’re going to hire a realtor to find us a place in Florida, let’s really get the money’s worth out of them and not have them look for just some of what we want. I’d like them to tell us if they see a motorcycle too close to the house. I realize that if a potential neighbor has got one hiding in their garage or they’re out at the time they’re checking the place out or they have loud visitors that aren’t around at the time, they may not know much of anything with just a glance. But if they do happen to see anything, we could steer clear of the place. My sleep is cursed enough without the wake-up calls.

Tom has a video interview on Friday but doesn’t expect to get the job and not just because he’s older and white. It’s a government job that probably pays a shitload of money so there would be tons of applicants.

I can’t see it ever happening but sometimes I really wish Aly lived nearby. That would be totally awesome! A friend who gets me, doesn’t judge me, and wouldn’t bug me in any way. On top of that, she’s super smart and not mentally ill. She may have her emotional moments but so does everybody. Oh, I’m gonna pretty damn emotional, alright, the day we fly away forever!

I’m excited because we’ve decided to get one of those DNA testing kits from 23andMe, though we haven’t ordered them yet. It’s something we’ve been wanting to do for quite some time. One of the Lifetime movies I recently watched, Mommy’s Little Princess, made me determined to check into it. In the past, I never gave a shit about ancestry and things like that but the technology behind it is quite fascinating. It just seems interesting in general and the kit we’re interested in, which is $200, also provides a health analysis. It would be interesting to see what diseases they say I’m most at risk for, but I think I can guess that it’s going to tell me I’m most likely to have a heart attack or a stroke.

Ancestry itself where you learn the names of past generations (famous or not) wouldn’t interest us as much as learning what percentage of each region we’re from.

Tom learned his last name means “pusher,” LOL. Not as in drug pusher but like those that push carts and things like that. Also, most people with his last name lived in Pennsylvania, which was a bit surprising to learn.

Another thing I’d like to have one of these days is an Apple watch, but it can wait. We still don’t want to spend too much on unnecessary things.

I looked up sleep spells and whatever tips I could find. Most sleep spells are just a chant, some requiring a white candle along with it.

On Healthline, there’s a sleep exercise called the Military Method designed for those in combat who need to sleep sitting up. They say it worked after 6 weeks even with coffee and gunshots in the background. Going to give this a try in another hour or two. In fact, I’m too tired to edit this right now. Going to start winding down with my audiobook and will post this at some point in the afternoon.

Written this afternoon:

Fell asleep around 1 a.m. and didn’t get up till 12:30. I was so exhausted so I’m not surprised I slept so long. I still woke up a million times along the way, twice to pee, and once because I smelled the strong scent of the body wash Tom has been using. It’s amazing noise didn’t wake me up because Tom said there was plenty of loud traffic. They’re pouring cement in preparation for the new house, and there were some tree-cutting trucks that seemed to be lost and going back and forth.

Dixie said she would call me because Diane fell this morning and had some bleeding. So I don’t know if I’ll be seeing her this evening but watch, because I got caught up on sleep and I’m not as tired as yesterday, I’ll be up until between 6:30 and 8:30 in the morning. And I was up for 21 hours the day before, not 20. Seriously, though, I’ll be up forever, sleep shitty and probably get woken up by the garbage trucks, then I’ll get to spend my day totally exhausted.

Aly wrote a super short revenge story on Kim where she dumps her but says dumping her would be a “hassle” so she’s just gonna scale back to 2-3 check-ins a month. Me too. I’ve definitely had an overdose of Kim’s June rants. If I ever did dump her, though, I would simply ghost her. I probably wouldn’t even unfollow her on Twitter, and I’ll never let her be connected to me on Facebook, so all I would have to do was just go quiet.

Another report from Dixie saying Diane had a complete meltdown, is with Linda and Walt for now, and waiting to hear back from Diane’s doctor. I told her to take her time getting back to me.

Wonder what disasters will have to happen before Dixie finally smartens up and gets them both into assisted living like so many have suggested she should.