I had quite an emotional day yesterday in both good and bad ways. Most of my day, or night, I should say since I’m still on nights right now, was absolutely horrible. I had both physical and emotional symptoms of anxiety. Plus, the racing HR and feeling hot and flustered. All side effects from the medication.

I got a notification that my lab results were in but couldn’t access them. After the blood is drawn, it goes down to Tampa where their main labs are. Galileo said to let them know when I went to the lab so they could be on the lookout for the results, and I told them I went early in the morning. That night, after I slept, I told them I got a notification they were in but couldn’t access them. They said they couldn’t access them either, but it could take a day or two to transfer over.

We still kept checking periodically, both of us guessing that my TSH was going to be a 5. Even though that was what we suspected, a part of me was like, I don’t know about that. This really feels like I’m in the normal range with the symptoms I’m having just like the last two times. The only difference is that this time I haven’t had lung tightness or a booming heart. Yes, my heart has been racy, but not beating like the devil is chasing it. Still, those symptoms, along with insomnia and having trouble staying asleep, told me I had to be pretty damn close to normal if I wasn’t normal. But then I went back to suspecting that maybe I was only a 5 which would still be out of range since I didn’t have the same symptoms I had before. I could totally see why and how I was absolutely batshit terrified when I first experienced this when I was home alone back when he was working.

Now here’s where it gets hard to use the speech-to-text because I still cry happy/surprised tears at times. LOL

Finally, one of the times we checked, my results were in. I clicked on the results expecting to see red, the color for anything that’s out of range. The green I saw instead blew me away and the fact that I was 2.94 and not 3.something or 4.something blew me away even more. I started shaking and trembling like I had some kind of internal earthquake. Tears started rolling down my face. I had finally gotten my “green” dream even if it came with a price to pay, and that was some pretty nasty side effects.

I looked at Tom and said, “No wonder I feel like shit.”

“Yup,” he said with a nod, just as surprised by the results as I was and then I burst out laughing like a mad idiot. LOL

So yeah, I definitely had some seriously mixed emotions. It was great to be normal and I’m sure that in time the side effects would likely back off, but I can’t know how long that would take. Even just a week is way too long because the side effects are so debilitating. I wasn’t kidding when I said I would rather be nauseous and puke my guts out every single day than go through this horrible feeling, and we all know how shitty it is to feel sick and then get sick.

So Galileo, being the awesome docs that they are, agreed to have me scale back a bit to taking the 88s six days a week and one 75 a week. They put a reminder in my chart to check in with me in two weeks to see how I’m doing. They are truly wonderful in taking the time to work with me through this and find that ideal balance. They acknowledge that they understand the delicate balance when it comes to the thyroid.

I may still one day be able to take 88s full time but how I feel always matters more than numbers. Nonetheless, dropping 12 micrograms a week should still keep me within the normal range, if not pretty damn close to it. As long as I don’t go over 9.

I’ve always said that I write for myself first and foremost, and that is 100% true. However, if I share this with anybody who may find the information helpful, that’s great. I know I have some regular readers who are quite young and can hopefully learn from my experiences as someone who is aging and find some of it helpful. Hashimoto’s is a common disease that affects mostly middle-aged women. So if you, my young and regular readers, ever go through what I’ve gone through, I hope this can help in some way.

It’s still gonna take a little time to get back to where I was before. I hope just one 75 a week will be enough to make a difference. After all, I went up a dose every four weeks and not 6. Between 6 to 8 weeks is when it really peaks in the system. So technically I didn’t give each dose time to fully accumulate. I’m a little worried about how I may feel tomorrow and the days after that because I’ve got to do six days of 88s starting tomorrow.

I think the only reason I was something like 3.35 which is higher than what I am now back when Doc O tried me the first time on 88s was because I was only on it for a month before I had to stop because the side effects were so bad. I will always be ever so grateful that Doc D didn’t jump me to 100s because she would have killed me!

So right now my only concern is whether or not cutting just one of the 88s out will be enough. And how many appointments and how much money my dental work will cost us in a few weeks, LOL.

I’m tired today too, so I’ll have to go back to waiting an hour after taking my meds. For the last few days, I waited only half an hour. If that doesn’t help, then something else has been causing the fatigue.

I filled Doc A in, but as usual, she read but didn’t reply.

Tom has been the most wonderful and amazing supportive guy! I swear I would not be alive today if it wasn’t for this man. I cooked pizza sliders for him for the first time and he loved them. He said it was “Domino’s” good.

I was so glad to see he picked up the 75s so that when I got up, I could immediately start to lower my dose.

Mia is now on level 140!