According to Tom, Bill’s not here today. Is his car dead again?

I got a really long email from Evie and in it, she said that since the roof is a big job to do alone, to call if we want help. How can David help? He has a full-time job and two kids. Plus, from what Tom’s said, he doesn’t exactly have the brains for this kind of work.

Between the way I’ve been eating the last couple of days and being stuck, I’ve gained a couple of pounds, so I’m only gonna have a bite today. I don’t want to go over 115 pounds if I can help it.

We went out yesterday to Walgreens and Staples. At Staple’s, we looked at digital cameras and Tom looked for a game, but couldn’t find anything of interest. I got cartoon disks, some color changer/stamper markers, and more iron-on sheets for the T-shirts.

At Walgreens, we were gonna get stamps and a puzzle for me, but we forgot the stamps and their puzzles were boring, so we just got nuts and chips.

Red Lobster called again looking for Andy. Looking for Mark, actually, cuz that’s the name he prefers to use nowadays. Why would they call here? I told the guy he doesn’t live here and he thanked me and hung up. Did Andy ever resolve his problems with those coworkers? He hasn’t left any messages about it, and that call he made on Saturday was his last call to me.

Spot has some kind of growth on her leg. A tumor, I guess, but she doesn’t appear to be in any pain or having trouble getting around despite how big her leg is at the hip area, fortunately.

As figured, the traps caught no mice of any kind either in the back room or the garage.

It’s 32” from the top of my head to my lower ass where the ends of my hair are (the longest ends, anyway). So that means my hair is more than half my height since I’m 59”.

After nagging Tom for months to trim the hedges and tree, I feel bad about it. First of all, he can’t help being so busy and having no time for it, and even if he did have time to do it, he doesn’t want to. He hates that stuff just as much as I hate dusting and vacuuming. So, he shouldn’t be pushed to do anything he doesn’t want to do.

Tom and I talked about taking care of ourselves sexually. I told him I liked vibrators better than my hand and that I thought of women when I’d take care of myself since I don’t need to fantasize about him, cuz he’s not a fantasy. He’s here with me in real life. He said he thinks of nothing in particular but sex when he takes care of himself. So he definitely is taking care of relieving himself as I always believed, but this is good. Better to get off by yourself than in no way at all, and I totally understand. Some of us just prefer to get off by ourselves. It’s easier that way, although his reasons are different than mine. He gets off by himself so he can’t risk impregnating me. I do it cuz he can’t know what I’m feeling. Only I can, and only I know what’s best and how to hit the spot just right that feels best to me. It’s much harder to tell a person how to do you than it is to just do yourself, cuz you know yourself and what feels best to you better than anyone else. It’s too hard to get off when he’s on the side and it takes forever, I can’t get off with him up top, and although to be eaten out is my favorite, that too takes some time because I have to keep on constantly telling him to go down lower, or up higher, or lighter, or harder. So, I may as well just save the orgasms for my own time alone, just like he saves 99% of his for himself to take care of.

So, since having sex with him just doesn’t feel as good as doing it alone, and since there’s no child to conceive motivating me, this is why I’ve come to be glad that he’s got such a low drive himself and that our schedules and busyness don’t allow us to be consistent with the sex. It’s just not something I look forward to doing anymore. I love to be close to him and to spend time with him, but the sexual part of it is not like a chore for me, but just a bore. Just something that I do and something I just go through the motions of doing. Since we both would rather orgasm on our own, I wonder why we even bother at times.

Later…

Thank God we don’t live several houses behind us. I was out brushing my hair and watching Tom, although I couldn’t see much of him since he was now at the front of the house when I heard this dog with an incredibly obnoxious bark. Worse than what the freeloaders had and maybe even slightly worse than the guard dogs, too, but that one’s too close to call. It sounded like the dog that the trailer people had. I still haven’t seen them in ages, by the way, but anyway, it had a whining, shrilly type of bark that’s between a cry and a scream. If that thing were just a few feet away next door, I’d kill those freeloaders for sure for having that right outside my window, then I’d set the dog free. I wouldn’t even wait the time it’d take to have them come out and investigate her having a dog she’s not supposed to have, then demanding she gets rid of it. Thank fucking God for her and for me that she can’t have a dog, cuz some subsidized situations let you have a dog. The NHA lets you have one dog or cat that doesn’t exceed a certain height and length.

If all dogs’ bark were like the one across the street, then they’d be a little easier to live with. The one across the street doesn’t bark much and it has a lower, softer kind of bark. That shrieking thing that I just heard, though, wouldn’t be able to be drowned out by fans if it were just a few feet away. Fortunately, though, it’s far enough away that you can’t hear it in the house.

Later…

The rest of this month is gonna be pretty tough on me. I’ve got the crotch doctor to see on the 23rd and Melanie to see on the 29th. I got up at 8 AM today. It’s too soon between now and the 23rd to flip my schedule, which I couldn’t do anyway with Tom’s working on the roof, and then it’ll be too soon between the 23rd and the 29th to flip it, so I’m gonna have to stay on days for the rest of this month. It’s gonna be soooooo hard.

The freeloader was in for lunch. It parked on the street since it’s not Sunday and the city maybe won’t do a spot check. I commented to Tom that the bitch must be home since Bill was not there and he was coming to have lunch with her, but Tom said he doesn’t think she was home cuz he seems to only come over when she's not here. Yeah, could be. Besides, this bitch knows enough assholes just like herself to give her rides. But why would the cock only come here if she’s not here? If she doesn’t want him around, and it does seem like they’ve been avoiding each other, why doesn’t she get the key back from him? And also, why can’t he go to his own place for lunch? Is it further away from where he works? Doesn’t she feel used by him coming to eat her food for lunch and to use her washer and TV?

Well, at least the black boy is behaving. It’s not slamming doors or banging bass. In fact, I wouldn’t even know it was here if Tom didn’t tell me. He’s the one that saw its car from the roof.