I’m totally not looking forward to winter. I hate having to wear slippers and I hate long sleeves. Worst of all I hate being cold. I would definitely take Florida over this. Besides, no place is ever 100% “safe.” Certain places may be more prone to natural disasters, but hell, a meteorite could crash into my house right now. Nothing’s ever guaranteed. The only guarantee is that it’s going to get cold and I’m not going to like it. It’s already getting down to 74° in the house in the morning like it is right now and I’m freezing. I’m still a little hypo after letting my thyroid crash a bit due to the experiment I was doing, but I’ve always been super sensitive to cold. I like it between 76° and 78° in here. Seriously, where are the hot flashes when you need them?

I got a clever idea yesterday that looks great. The solar toys I have on the windowsill were propped up to see the sun better on little Dixie cups. We had an old broken fan on a stand that had crossbars for feet. I unscrewed them and used one of the bars to prop the solars up on and this looks a lot better than the cups. Another half-hour or so and they’ll all be swinging, bouncing and waving.

Am I a better writer or a better storyteller? I think I’m a better writer but Tom thinks I’m a better storyteller because I’m creative and all that. Okay so I don’t tell the worst stories but I wish I could write longer and more intricate plots. With ADD, though, it’s hard to focus on things that long. I have a shorter attention span, I run out of patience easily, and therefore I can end up getting bored with a story even if it’s a really good idea.

Childish or not it was fun to give Cindie A a piece of my mind on both Facebook and Twitter. Like Kim and Aly, she’s notorious for creating multiple accounts. I knew that because Lori is a mutual friend of ours Facebook would point her future accounts out to me in their ‘suggested friends’ section, and they did. Found the nutjob on Twitter too.

I realize that it may be childish and immature of me to stoop to her level, but I couldn’t help but surprise her and ask if she would have the guts to call me a cunt in person as she did online. Somehow I doubt she would.

Later…

I’ve been running all my journals through Grammarly for any errors that both Word and my own eyes may have missed. I’m up to the summer of 1995 now.

As I’ve said before, I may be quick to disbelieve or be unsure as to whether or not people really have dream premonitions had I not had any myself. And as I’ve also said, I’ve never had any concrete experience to prove there is a God, so I don’t know if there is one or not. Lastly, I could say I’ve never had any experiences with ghosts, despite a couple of weird things right before learning that my Italian Foster mom and then an old teacher of mine died, but maybe I have.

Back in 1995, I felt a “presence” in our home in Phoenix, AZ. It was a positive entity that never gave me any ill feelings. It never hurled our dishes across the room. It never turned our lights on in the middle of the night. It never did anything crazy like that.

I never sensed that they haunted the place in the traditional sense or anything like that and I didn’t think they’d ever been in the house when they were alive either. I got the impression that the spirit, ghost, entity, whatever… was young. Like in their 20s or 30s. The so-called “thing” somehow managed to “tell” me that they had died 10 years ago from cancer. Also, her name was Robin M.

So last night I was sitting here reading about a ghost that Andy was telling me about at the same time which he believed was haunting his place. When I shared my own story with him I asked him if it sounded crazy and he said that if it hadn’t been for his own experience with “Greg,” then yes, he would have thought it was crazy.

My first thought last night was that we were both absolutely nuts. Young, crazy, and totally delusional. I said to myself that I was crazy to have once believed in God and I was just as crazy to have believed that there was any kind of a ghost, friendly or not, in his place or mine. Especially one that Andy said he believed had his way with him in his sleep. He had to have just been lonely and imagined it or maybe he was batshit, right? And I was just as crazy and I had to have been imagining the whole “Robin” thing and somehow lost my grip on reality for some reason.

But then, just for the hell of it, I went to Legacy and I ran the name Robin M. One popped up in Phoenix and I’m like, no way! This has got to be a joke! Sure enough, I found that she died this millennium.

So now I’m back to the crazy theory, assuming I had simply lost my perspective on what was real and what was not for a brief time out of wishful thinking. Maybe I just subconsciously thought the idea of a ghost would be fun and exciting.

But then further research turned up something pretty damn shocking on ancestry.com. I’m not a paying member so I couldn’t get in to access the full information to find out where this person lived/died, but coincidentally or not, there was a Robin M who was born in 1957, the year Tom was born. She died in 1984. Well, in 1995 the entity said she had been dead for 10 years. Close enough.

So if I didn’t go Kim M for a little while there, then this is an absolutely amazing OMG kind of coincidence.

Do you believe in coincidences?