I’ve been bored out of my mind today and have been wondering what the hell it was I did back in the 90s that I’m not doing now because I sure as hell don’t remember being this bored back then.

I guess one thing I was doing was writing more by hand since computers had yet to become what they are today and social media didn’t exist. I was more sociable too, but not something I miss with all the headaches it would bring. I wasn’t kidding when I said I got the social distancing thing down long before the coronavirus hit.

This was also the second day that I’ve experienced that yucky fatigue I sometimes get. My low-carb diet? Yeah, probably. Or maybe it’s because I’ve been slacking off on my ACV shots.

I know it’s pointless since the past is the past and it’s never coming back again which I’m mostly grateful for, but I can’t help but find myself comparing certain aspects of my present life to my past life, comparing what’s better and what’s not. 99% of it is better except for the fact that when I was in my teens and twenties it seemed like the world was full of endless possibilities. Anything was possible, and I had so many more new and exciting things to look forward to that I’d never experienced before. The end wasn’t further than the beginning and I didn’t worry about growing old and possibly suffering in the end and dying alone.

But now what do I have to look forward to other than the same things day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year? Getting new dolls and other collectibles isn’t as exciting as it once was. I have a million of them. Shopping for new clothes isn’t a big deal. I have plenty of clothes. Gadgets, electronics, beauty supplies, kitchen stuff…I pretty much have it all. I could use a new bed but decided to wait until we move, so we’re done with new furniture and home upgrades in this place.

Most of the things that would be new and exciting aren’t anything we could ever afford. I feel like all I have left to look forward to in life is our eventual move. But once we get set up wherever we end up, then what? The same old things? Yeah, probably. Thank God I don’t have 50-60 more years to live!

I took a small plastic table and brought it into the bedroom where I have my little office and set up my coloring books and colored pencils in there where it’s a little quieter. I hadn’t colored in ages, and this way it will be more convenient to do.

I suppose I could pick back up with the painting and sculpting, but I’m just not as artsy as I used to be. I’m not even as creative as I once was as far as stories go, but I decided I would give CampNaNo a try after all. He even signed up, determined to write something. I have been LMAO at that one.

I have been trying to get myself back into my writing and thinking of new things to do, but my mind keeps drawing a blank. I thought about doing the things I’ve been doing for longer periods at a time, but it simply doesn’t take that long to do most of the things I do these days. So once I get toward the middle of my day, I’m bored shitless.

I totally love the griddle that came with our oven because I was easily able to make a pork chop and a couple of slices of bacon at once. My cholesterol must be through the roof by now!