Yesterday we had the time of our lives, even if today we’re paying for it with the sunburn from hell. Despite using waterproof sunscreen, neither of us can worry about a lack of vitamin D, that’s for sure!

I’m having so much fun and loving this climate so much that I don’t want to go home. I miss my bed, my rats and my stuff, but I don’t want to go home to have to go back to work, clean the house, and deal with a million doctor appointments.

I love that there are hardly any blacks here. I don’t think I’ve even heard anyone speaking Spanish. Crime is barely existent here without these degenerate scumbags everyone seems to worship, especially in the West and the Southeast.

We drove to a parking lot for Trilogy catamaran sailing tours, which normally cost $200 per person, and then walked a few blocks to the harbor where tons of boats for different companies were docked. There were tons of touristy shops along the way and an area with trees where I never heard so many birds at once. There had to be hundreds of them! They were in a huge tree given to Lahaina as a gift from Japan.

There were two catamarans, each able to hold 55 people, and each shorter than our house. Captain Jill, a deeply tanned blond, navigated the boat across to another island whose name I already forgot (Oahu?). There were 3 other crew members, two women, also blond and tanned, and a guy.

I thought it ridiculous that one of the passengers brought an infant onboard of all things. Wouldn’t it have been terrified? Well, if it was wailing its ass off I wouldn’t know it over the boat’s engine, the wind, and the fact that I wasn’t sitting near it. Overall there doesn’t seem to be many kids here. A reflection of the falling birthrate? Or maybe it’s cuz people without kids can barely afford such an expensive place let alone with them.

Anyway, it was a little warm in the direct sunlight, but once we got sailing full speed, the breeze was wonderful. They would stop every time someone would spot a whale and people would take pics like crazy. I hated it when people would get in the way and there was this one guy I practically wanted to pitch overboard, but hopefully when I check out the pics when we get home I will find I got some decent whale shots. It was hard to see what I was shooting at, so I would just point and shoot like crazy and hope for the best.

There was this area in front where you could sit on these thick nets and see straight down to the water, but we were content to just sit on the bench and stand at the rails.

The first thing we were served was cinnamon rolls, then assorted fruits like watermelon, honeydew melon and pineapple. The last thing we were served was wraps. There was tuna, chicken and turkey. Naturally, Tom hated everything but the cinnamon roll.

The people were young and old but mostly older folks. Some were thin and hot, others fat frumps like me. Gotta hand it to those with bellies bulging worse than mine who had the guts to wear bikinis. Some were as pale as I am, but most were tanned. Well, I’m a mix of white and lobster red right now, LOL.

We’ve had sunny weather most of the time, but they’re predicting rain for the weekend. That’s okay, we’ve had our share of sunshine, and submarines go underwater anyway.

According to the boat crew, the deepest waters we sailed over were 350 feet deep, and whales can go as shallow as 60 feet or less. Once the catamaran docked at the island, we were greeted with a shell necklace similar to the ones the hotel gave us, and then we took a long hot walk down to the beach. Diving into that ocean felt so damn good as hot as I was once they finally finished their safety speech and all that stuff.

Then came the best part of the trip – snorkeling! You know how I said this resort and the area is just like I’ve seen in pictures? Well, so was what I saw underwater! Now it’s the same people overseeing all the activities, mind you. The catamaran crew also takes you snorkeling or on a tour of the city, if that’s what you prefer instead, and they also cook your dinner. What a job, huh? Sailing, sunning, snorkeling and cooking all day long.

So one of the girls got me fitted in a thing you wrap around your waist that keeps you afloat, and my goggles, after she sprayed something in them to keep them from fogging up. They had prescription goggles, but since I’m still farsighted enough, I was okay with regular ones. She walked me out past the breakers (as I’ve learned, you can’t just walk into the ocean here anytime you want if you don’t want to get knocked down, and must go between swells) and once I was up to my chest in the water I put my flippers on.

Tom’s camera can go underwater, and he shot some pics and videos. He wishes he got the nicer camera for $200. We just didn’t think we’d use it enough.

So off I went and at first I was like, why is this so impressive to most people? There’s nothing to see but sand… then there they were! Clumps of coral and the most beautiful tropical fish of all kinds and colors! It was almost like swimming through a giant aquarium! I couldn’t help but think, from poverty to this?!?! Wow! We went out to where we were in 20-30 feet of water and words can’t describe just how spectacular it was!

After that and some regular swimming, we passed up the walk to the tide pool and just hung out till it was time for the barbecue. I was so pissed that I didn’t bring my other sandals since my new ones caused my feet to blister a bit, and putting on socks and sneakers is a bitch even after you’ve used the freshwater shower to get the sand off of you. Being humungous didn’t help either. I am utterly appalled and disgusted by how big I’ve gotten and how it’s hindering my mobility. I’m sick of it. I vowed to myself that if I can’t get the fucking weight off the healthy way once they’ve tweaked my new medication, then the unhealthy way it is! Gotta wonder, though, would I have gotten this fat if my thyroid hadn’t crapped out on me?

At one point I was about 6” too close to the shore when a wave had just begun to curl and smacked me real hard in the chest. That’s what I get for not paying attention.

The only annoyances at the beach were the same landscapers I have to deal with nearly every day at home blowing the grassy areas and walkways, and someone jackhammering in one of the buildings up at the summit of one of the hillsides surrounding the bay.

After a few hours of beach time, we walked back down the road to the pavilion where our boat was docked and gathered at picnic tables. A blond version of Marsha Gay Harding sat across from us as we were served a meal I wasn’t very impressed with at all. First up was a roll and salad. I didn’t eat all the salad, wanting to save room for dinner, but had I known it would be these boring noodles and veggies with peas, plus chicken marinated in something really weird tasting, I would’ve finished the damn salad like Marsha was smart enough to do. I was surprised Tom ate some of the chicken, but at that point, he was too hungry to care. So I drank down my grapefruit juice and then we waited on the grassy cliff while the crew bussed the tables.

Over the time we sailed back, I had pineapple juice, ice cream, and a white wine that tasted more like beer. Of course Tom laughed at that one and said I was crazy.

The wind tossed my pink sequined hat off onto the deck toward the end of the trip, but fortunately, I caught it before it could join the whales.

They unfurled the sails on the way back, but not for long since there wasn’t much wind. What wind there was felt so good, though coming back was a little chillier as the sun began to set. By the time we pulled into the harbor and Captain Jill docked our boat, the sun had just dipped below the island.

Later…

Was out on the patio whale watching earlier. The island may have many birds, but it sure doesn’t have as many bugs as you’d think it would have.

Also, I’m amazed at just how often people seem to be in their rooms here. Yes, they’re expensive but don’t they too, want to be off doing things? Every time we’re in our room, so are they. Or so it seems.

We were out all day yesterday and most of today. Sleeping hasn’t been too difficult, but I’m so drained from the sun and all the activity that I need to sleep forever. Plus I wake up a lot along the way, so I’m in bed a total of 10 hours some days. I’ll probably sleep for 12 once we get home. My schedule’s been okay so far, but the next few days will get harder. Monday actually may be hell on me, but we leave that day so being shorted one day won’t kill me. I always wished I were one of those who only needed 6 or 7 hours of sleep or less, but (shrugs) I am how I am, sleep-needy and all. Meanwhile, it’s early evening now and I really hope they stop banging by the time I’m ready to crash in an hour or two.

Until I do crash, let me cover today’s fun so I don’t get behind. We went to Lulu’s again and I got the steak, eggs and hash browns I liked a lot the last time and Tom got a ham and cheese omelet.

After breakfast, I bought stamps and mailed my postcards to Tammy, Andy, Paula, Eileen and my Italian Dad, and then we went to a mall with a dozen or so fun shops. Pricy, but nice. The boutiques had the things Hawaii’s famous for on their clothes, magnets and other things – plumeria and hibiscus flowers, as well as palm trees and pineapples. We also went to a strip of stores down by the harbor.

He grabbed a blizzard and me a soda at Dairy Queen, then later on we returned to the mall where I got a heaping container of pork fried rice at a Chinese place that is actually quite good. I just wish the container wasn’t so flimsy. I have the leftovers in the fridge for later.

From all the stores we went to we gathered 3 shirts for him, a black tank for me with “Maui, Hawaii” written in bright rainbow colors, a hot pink tank with “Maui” in silvery glitter, a black tee with colorful metallic studs, a black sleeveless dress with large pink hibiscus flowers on it, a colorful cover-up, a pink skirt with colored flowers along its hem, 4 pairs of panties in pink, purple and blue, a necklace with a pink-gemmed flip-flop, a pair of floral flip-flops that are more comfortable than the other ones, a pineapple sun catcher with crystals, and 4 magnets. The magnets consist of a sunset and palms, a hula dancer, a blue-gemmed dolphin, and a female figure’s upper body in a pink bikini top. That one has a bottle opener on it. I also got a 3D bookmark of a tropical scene cuz it was just so cool looking even though I don’t read regular books anymore.