Finished watching the second season of 13 Reasons Why and was a little disappointed in the ending. I kind of wanted something big to go down in the end. Don’t read any more of this if you plan to watch it, but when I saw Tyler approach the school with the rifle, I was kind of hoping he would take out Bryce and his cronies. The way it ended suggested there will be a season 3.

I was both surprised and not surprised that the court found for the school. I wasn’t surprised since the school can’t be responsible for what its students do at home, but I was surprised because these days we love to blame everybody but ourselves for our own actions.

Things were different back in the 80s when I attempted suicide, and I agree with my husband who believes that the adults in my life should have been held accountable. Not for what I did but for the circumstances leading up to it. 17-year-olds don’t go throwing themselves out windows for the fun of it.

Many people’s attitudes and false beliefs towards the subject of suicide still surprise and disgust me. Someone recently said that we’re all just a few events away from at least seriously considering it and I totally believe that. I know that if I lost my husband, I wouldn’t want to stick around no matter how much money we may have. To say that good health and happiness are the most important things in life is the understatement of the century! We may have money now but more than likely will be low income upon retirement, and you know what? That’s just fine with me as long as we have each other and we’re happy and healthy. Without that, life is pretty meaningless. At least to me it is.

I get fed up with people saying they don’t understand why celebrities who have it all would “throw it all away” in regards to the celebs that have taken their lives. If you think physical and emotional illnesses discriminate then you’re just as naive as those that believe all lesbians were raped or molested, all Jews are rich, all Hispanics are on welfare, All blacks are gang-affiliated, and every single Muslim wants to kill those who have a different belief system. When I was going through hell physically and emotionally because of the health issues I had, my thoughts were pretty damn dark at times yet I had it all. Love, money, a nice house, etc. Until you’ve truly suffered to such extremes, I don’t think you can understand how it’s possible for some people to end up taking their lives or seriously considering it.

Yet many people still hold these false beliefs when it comes to many different subjects. I don’t think it’s just a matter of them being inexperienced, uneducated or stupid so much as ignorant. If someone really doesn’t want to believe or accept something, they won’t. Human nature has shown that people often deny what they don’t get or don’t like. So despite the science to back it up, along with people’s personal experiences of course, some people are never going to believe that we really are born with our sexuality, be it straight, bi, gay, or pervert. After all, they do say that those who are attracted to children can’t change for a reason; because they were born that way and there’s no changing that. The only thing we can choose is whether or not we actually act on whatever our preference is. Not what that preference is in the first place.

So some people can go on saying, “Oh, but it’s just my opinion,” yet there’s a difference between having an opinion and being incorrect. Anyone can think of or commit suicide if circumstances push them far enough into the dark. No one is exempt no matter how much we may like to think we are.

I’m still waiting for fiber-optic chaos to hit here but so far it’s been way quieter than expected. Other than those few hours last Friday, no one’s been working near the house. But the streets are still marked so I know it’s only a matter of time before they get here. I just hope they do it while I’m awake.

Thanks to Tom, I’m now voice-blogging on Tumblr. I just couldn’t find a convenient way to convert the audio files until he found an application that is simple enough to use. I do have to go through a few more steps than I had to with Bubbly, but at least this site is faster and more reliable. I also like how it has a calendar and I don’t have to keep scrolling and scrolling forever to get back to my earlier posts.

Anyway, the vacation may be over but so is having a messy, cluttered and dusty house. I’ll be cleaning a room or two each day this week and getting things back in shape. We put most of the stuff back in place yesterday so I don’t have much to put away or organize. I just have to clean, especially dust, as my allergies have been a little worse lately.

Trying raw organic apple cider vinegar shots to see if that helps my cholesterol. Before I was using distilled ACV and I’m not sure that’s the one people recommend for lowering cholesterol, among other health benefits. I have my doubts it will help but I’m willing to try most things once.