I waited as long as I could stand to wait for the temperature to drop so I could go out for my run. With ADD I can only stand to sit still for so long before I’m just itching to move. I hate being inactive for long periods of time. It’s still pretty warm out. I’m drinking ice cold water and relaxing and I still feel warm.

On my way back, as I was coming up behind the house, I could make out someone on the patio of the house in back of us. After being here 4 years I finally met them. It’s a guy named Laurence. He inherited the house from his mother when she died in 1999. Due to the dim lighting, it was hard to really make out his age. Besides, this section of the park is on a steep hill so there’s a retaining wall back there and he’s a few feet higher than us like we’re a few feet higher than Bob and Virginia.

I thanked him for trimming the trees in front of his place and told him that these woodpeckers were having a field day with twigs that the wind would blow across the street and onto our patio roof as they would gather nesting material.

The “loud car” house dropped the price down to 120K, but I still think they’re going to have to drop it to 95K before it will sell. At least this shows that yes, they are serious about moving. Maybe they really did get kicked out.

Tom left a message at an AC place for them to tune up our AC for $50. Tomorrow’s going to be a scorcher at 105°.

Later…

The AC guy completely blew us off, so I guess we’ll have to fix it ourselves. We know that it’s one of two parts that need to be replaced, neither of which should cost more than $35. If I just keep it under 78° in here it shouldn’t have a problem, though. It’s only if it’s set that high in the late afternoon when the sun’s shining on the side of the house the AC is on. During other times, I can set it higher. Before, I was only dropping it to 76° for sleeping, but now I’ll pay closer attention to the time and temperature. There isn’t much risk unless it’s a triple-digit day, and triple-digit days aren’t very common here. It should be 10° cooler by Sunday.

Some sections of my hair look just as fried as before, but in order to get rid of all the damage, I would have to practically shave my head. Sure am enjoying the ease and convenience of having shorter locks, though. I can totally see why older women resort to man cuts that are above the shoulders. If I’m ever going to join the ranks it’s going to be a long time from now. I like to keep the added touch of femininity by not going above the shoulders.

Does getting up at 3:30 in the afternoon mean I get to get out of hearing activity around here? Absolutely not. The Twenties received a very loud delivery of what we’re pretty sure is material for a new retaining wall. So I guess I’ll have to listen to that for the next project, though Tom says it’s not a noisy project. Well, we’ll see about that.

I’m about a week late for my period now but still feeling great and calm despite having PMS symptoms. If I’m as right as I think I am about what caused my anxiety all along, and if I stick to the plan, I should never have that problem again. Then God can be free to sic the next long-term problem on me. Hard to believe it could be as bad as what I went through, though, as long as it wasn’t on Tom.

Gonna take the levothyroxine every day until labs which should be around September 2, and which should be doable. Normally I don’t get anxious unless I’m taking it every single day for 2-3 months straight. But a month should be enough to avoid the anxiety yet get my numbers to where the doc won’t worry about them too much and have her nurse call me in for an unnecessary appointment. After labs, I will skip Mondays and Thursdays.

My ear has been bothering me big-time and I still say there’s more going on than just jaw arthritis. I think I’m suffering nerve damage as well as drainage issues. Like Tom is quick to say, it’s usually more than just one thing.

As Tom also said, we really need a 12-step program for Amazon addicts. How about just sticker addicts? I swear I’m such a sticker whore since I just ordered $50 worth of 3-D stickers. They should look really cool, though. They are as follows:

·         A 9-inch dangling kitten you put just under a doorknob or something like that.

·         An 11-inch sunflower I’m going to slap on the middle of my desk.

·         Two cats that look like they’re tearing through your wall or your toilet seat cover or wherever you want it to look like they’re punching through. I’m going to put them on our toilet seat covers. The side we can see when they’re up, which is pretty much all the time. We rarely shut their lids except for when we go on vacation so the water can’t evaporate as fast.

·         An 11-inch burger and an 11-inch pizza for the kitchen counters. I plan to place one on either side of the sink, and later on, I may add the frying pan with the egg in it to another section of the counter.

·         A 36-inch sticker of killer whales busting through the floor. They really looked very 3-D online and like they really were jumping up out of a hole in the floor. I thought I would put them in front of my toilet since the fishpond is in front of my sink.

The two peas in a pod are still good buddies after all. Should have figured as much, but hey, they can have each other. They deserve each other, too.

Now here’s something interesting. An hour ago I was browsing through my archived messages when I noticed that Scot got my message after all. How? Because he blocked me. It’s been days since I was in that section of messages or went to his profile, so I don’t know when he blocked me. I just know I was quick to return the favor and block him in return, and then I wondered why he blocked me. It just seems a bit extreme.

I wonder if this means that O knows about it. It’s hard to believe he didn’t mention it to someone somewhere, but I’m not worried about it because nothing I said was illegal. For a split second, I worried that saying I was a part-time detective could get me in trouble since I don’t have a license, but I don’t think so. Anyone can investigate whatever they want to on their own time, and I did say I worked independently, which is true. I still consider myself a lot more of a writer, though.

I don’t have any bad vibes, despite being at a psychic “low” these days and I’m not going to let anyone fuck with me. That’s a promise I made to myself 14 years ago when I got my life back and it’s a promise I’ll never break to myself either. They can hit me with all the subpoenas they want, but unless they break in here and drag me out, I’m nobody’s court bitch. I know Arizona has some pretty insane laws and that if anyone could manipulate things against me it might be someone like Scott, but that’s the other promise I made to myself that I won’t break; the one where I refuse to let what happened scare me from using my voice.

Call me paranoid, but I’ve often wondered what accounts of mine they might have snooped into without my knowledge. Arizona hasn’t appeared on my visitor list but if anyone’s going to hide, it’s Scott. He couldn’t browse my Facebook account without Facebook notifying me, so he would have to get them to keep quiet about it, which I don’t think they can do. I think Facebook would have to notify me that my information was requested just like Google notified me, assuming that was a legit notification that really did come from Google, and I seriously have my doubts because again, I didn’t do anything illegal back then. I didn’t send the black bitch enough stuff to constitute spam, and even if I had, I think a “spammer” has to send things to multiple people and not just one person. If the notification was legit then she and her connections had to have falsified whatever to make me look bad, though I would like to think that if I had been dumb enough to fall for their trap a second time, my provider (or better yet Jesse’s) could have proven exactly what was sent, but who knows?

I like to sit and analyze, guess, speculate and wonder, but do I really think they could be watching me from the inside or out? Well, it’s easy for me to answer with both yes and no. No, because nothing I’ve done warrants watching. Yes, because law enforcement loves to waste time on piddly shit rather than focus on real criminals that are an actual danger to society. I don’t care what they see, though. It’s only what they do that matters, and believe me, if there ever is a next time, it’s going to matter a lot more to them than it ever could to me defensive sounding or not.

With Stacey being a psychologist, I wish she were here so I could ask her what makes people tend to block people versus simply ignore them. My guess is that those who choose to block you simply don’t want to hear from you again, and I think Scott probably got the wrong idea and assumed I wanted to be buddies with him.

I think there are a couple of reasons why those who ignore us choose to do so. I think they figure that blocking a person is giving them a reaction same as if they reacted with words. They could also want to leave the line of communication open hoping you’ll say something illegal that they can get you with.