Okay, I’m going to attempt to use Google Docs while on my treadmill. So far it seems to do a great job of hearing what I’m saying and understanding me. My skier is quiet but the treadmill isn’t. The faster you run on the treadmill, the louder it is. Gotta go at a leisurely pace of 2.3 MPH or else it won’t understand me as well.

I was so pissed off yesterday because while we were discussing the home Improvement plans we want to make in what time we have left here, I looked at a really pretty 3D decorative plate with flowers and hummingbirds hanging on the living room wall and thought that Tammy would love it. I went to reach for it and what did I do? Smashed the fucking thing to smithereens when it slipped out of my grip. I was so pissed!

Her surgery is tomorrow. Still no dreams so I’m guessing no news is good news? I hope that’s the case but I don’t see every single thing that happens in my dreams nor can I control what I do see. I don’t always know that they mean anything until and if they come to fruition. Sometimes I get a feeling right away that a certain dream is a sign of something to come or a warning but sometimes I don’t. I’m hoping that it doesn’t turn out to be any big deal because as Tom reminded me, the doctors were once pretty sure that Mary had cancer all throughout her body yet she didn’t.

I can’t remember every single thing she and I discussed during our phone chat but I misunderstood her about the motorcycles. They are allowed where she lives but like here, if they go joyriding through the place and there’s a complaint, they’ll be kicked out. I was surprised she mentioned a Doberman living there but I guess they used to allow dogs of all sizes until they put similar size limits on them that they have here. I don’t think smaller dogs are necessarily quieter, but if you’re like me and you’re afraid of big dogs, then it’s definitely nice to live where there aren’t any.

A lady was walking her Chihuahua which she freed of its leash as she neared her home and it ran up barking at me. I petted it and then it barked for more when I stopped just like the woman said it would. I like the look and feel of this breed but they do have the bark from hell. A quick check of dog breeds, sizes and temperaments suggests a Basenji dog might eventually be good for me. It’s hypoallergenic and doesn’t bark as much.

Tom has gotten really good at picking locks, haha. As I may have mentioned, he gets a surprise electronics box every few months from ADAfruit and this time it contained a clear lock with lock-picking tools because the point of their packages is to understand how things work. He can pick their lock in just a minute or two but it took him a long time to pick an old rusty padlock of ours. I can’t even pick the easy one but I’m not as patient as he is.

My book Socio was published over the weekend but I’m sure I won’t get shit for sales.

So in the one to six years we expect to be here since they could lay him off anytime, while he doesn’t expect to be working there beyond 67 if they don’t, we decided on what we think is worth doing with the place while we’re still here. It’s a little late to do the windows. We should have done them early on but we didn’t so we’re not going to do that and we’re likely not going to laminate the laundry and kitchen floors like we should have either. We actually don’t know for sure on the floors, but we are getting the new oven probably at the end of this month, and we have plans to drywall the hallway. I love pink and it’s definitely my favorite color but even I can’t stand the blinding pink I so stupidly chose for the hallway. So we’re going to white that out. We had planned to eventually do another mural in the living room and our long hallway, so we think we might do them both at once when he takes a week off in early June.

We disagree on when we should do the roof, though. His logic is that we should wait another year since it held up during the rainy season because that way we’re getting the money’s worth out of what we paid for when we bought the house nearly 5 years ago. My logic is that the sooner we get the new roof, the quicker we can enjoy the peace of mind a new roof would bring and an extra year to get the money’s worth out of that.

Cutting back on sodium has helped my blood pressure at least enough to where it’s not waking me up with my pulse pounding in my neck but it’s still elevated. I probably do need blood pressure medicine but with my medication phobia, I’m not in any hurry to get any. I still say that how I feel matters more than how many more years I live. If I were in my 20s I would be more concerned.

It does kind of suck to know that it’s probably going to take another 20 years before and if I naturally get on a schedule. By then my life will be virtually over.

We went to Sam’s on Saturday where I got a gorgeous floral quilt. It’s very stylish yet colorful. It will be good for the winter but probably not the summer. I’ve been looking for this for quite some time but didn’t realize they were calling them quilts. When I would look up duvets I would get comforters and when I would look up blankets I would get fleece blankets. What I like about this quilt is that it’s thicker than a fleece blanket so I don’t need two blankets during the winter, but it’s not as thick and heavy as a comforter.

We also loaded up on some bulk items like water, detergent, and even got some of those air fresheners you clip on your car vent and I like them a lot. Way better than the danglies that obstruct vision and lose their smell in no time.

On Sunday we went to Walmart and I got a bright pink tank dress for the summer.

I also got a deep dark red wine-colored lipstick for Suki and it looks awesome on her. Where I look horrible in dark-colored lipstick, she looks great. It’s totally her color and goes well with her dark eyes and black hair.

Breaked from this entry to get some other things done. Just finished cleaning Tom’s room and bathroom and now Roomba is taking over. So glad I don’t have to vacuum! Especially the living room.

It was quite chilly on my walk this morning but it’s to be a beautiful day and I have the window by my desk open since I’m not going to be sitting there today. I’m in the bedroom now and have a window open in here, too. I can faintly hear the guy mowing his lawn a couple of yards down even on the treadmill but that’s about it. The smell of fresh-cut grass is wafting in here. I’ve always liked that smell.

Decided to try some peanut sauce with which to season my vegetables but instead of being a thick nutty sauce it’s watery, spicy and gross.

It’s funny to see Mexico get a taste of their own medicine and see how they handle hordes of immigrants for a change instead of it always being on us. Funny how all these “poor” people claim to be so broke yet they appear well-dressed, well-fed, and in possession of all kinds of fancy gadgets.

Molly created a Prosebox account after all. It’s a little hard for me to fully trust Aly because she’s lied in the past. I can’t say for sure that she pointed my account out to Molly or that Molly even knows how to access my profile there since you can’t look up my name as I use a sun emoji for the ‘o’ in my name. But I did stupidly share the account link in the past and she could have gotten it on her own from a different site. I think that for the most part, Aly has learned from her mistakes and that I can mostly trust her with things, but if I really don’t want to risk anything being shared with Kim or Molly, then I won’t say anything at all.

You know, for a split second I laughed to myself at the thought of Aly and I remaining friends for the rest of my life and her inheriting my stuff and then being able to read everything I’ve written, including stuff I never shared with the public or anyone for that matter. That’s the price you pay, though, when you get all kinds of goodies from someone for free since everyone has at least something that someone could really use or that they would like. With those good freebies may come some rather strange, hurtful and surprising revelations.

Nothing’s changed with Molly. I read the two quick entries she posted, and according to Aly Molly says Prosebox is lame because no one has responded to her entries. Of course, that’s the whole point for her is to get attention. For me, it’s writing first, audience second.

Same old shit going on with her. They’re still trying to find the miracle concoction that will help her with her dramatic mood swings, no guys notice her, etc. Same old sad sob story. I guess she really has moved on in some ways, though. Aly said she has an iPhone and I did get a Texas view yesterday but they were in Arlington. I know every now and then someone shows up in a different location and sometimes even a different state. Still can’t say for sure that it was her. Aly assured me that while she seems to have let go of most things, there are a few things she’s still obsessed with like Roman, Josh and Kathy. I was a little surprised to hear that she’s still obsessed with Kathy but I’m guessing maybe she’s remained fixated on these people because she’s actually met them face-to-face. As long as she doesn’t harass me, all will be fine. I know right where she is, though. So if she does revert back to her old ways, Marbridge is just an email away.

I was surprised to learn that Molly hasn’t been restricted from being online at all. She just prefers to stick to Facebook mostly. She can go anywhere she wants from her phone but is not allowed to add any apps that didn’t come with her phone like Facebook.

I had a really sad dream the other day involving a cinnamon rat with the same colors and markings that Tinkerbell had. For some reason, I was forced to give it up and was devastated because I knew it would be killed. I was crying, hugging and kissing it, dreading the moment when I had to basically send it to its death.

Last night I dreamed that I was hanging out in some woman’s home or store. It seemed like it might have been more of a place of business. Some kind of boutique maybe? She received a delivery while I was there and the delivery man referred to her as Eden. She seemed to be in her 30s or 40s and I seemed to be young and desperate again even though I was married to Tom. My end goal was for her to be a playmate.

She said something about me being the kind that was fun to hang out with a few people around or alone and I told her she could contact me anytime.

Then I was going through her shorts. She had a pile of shorts present and I complimented a pink pair with a little rainbow.

Well, I may not be young and desperate, but I’m a little annoyed with Kathleen. First, she says she would like to go shopping with me, then she agrees to look me up on Facebook, then she tells me she doesn’t have a Facebook account, and then she invites me to some little get-together she never follows through on.

Why do women do this to me? She’s given me every indication to believe she likes me even if she knows we’ll never be more than friends, so what’s her problem then?