You know what? I’m really getting sick of this anti-American bullshit going on. Suddenly, we Americans are all fucked in the head because we’ve got a fucked up president, but you know what else? I didn’t vote for Trump. In fact, I didn’t vote at all. As a bisexual female who is an atheist, why would I vote for a guy who, closeted gay or not, only seems to have a heart for straight, white male Christians? Well, I wouldn’t if voting was my thing. I personally have never cared to vote. Politics just isn’t my cup of tea.

Back to the anti-American shit. As for the drama going on with the Jews and Palestinians, I do agree that regardless of what side you’re on, countries should keep more to themselves and mind their own business and quit trying to fight the battles of others. It’s on them and it’s their problem. However, I have nothing to do with it simply because I’m American. I didn’t make the Palestinians provoke the Jews into retaliating.

The point is that not every American agrees with Trump and wants to stick their nose in other countries’ business. So what are we going to do then? Hate every German because of Hitler? Hate every Muslim because some of them think that those who aren’t a carbon copy of themselves should be eradicated? Hate every black because some of them love to play the race card and go gang-banging? Hate every Hispanic because some of them like to sit on their asses and collect welfare at the taxpayers’ expense? Go ahead then, hate me because I’m an American in a country with a shitty president. Your opinion is as worthless to me as the grain of dirt on the ground I just walked on. :-)

What is it with me sleeping ten hours lately, waking up exhausted, then ending my day a bit early and in exhaustion as well? Could it be all the extra exercise that my body isn’t yet used to? Well, I’m taking the day off. Twice this is happened, although I suppose it isn’t hurting anything. My schedule is still progressing as it usually does.

And where the hell must so many planes have to fly to at 1:40 in the morning like they were?

Got to enjoy a really cool thunderstorm with heavy rain which is a rarity here, especially at this time of year. Of course some landscaping noise had to ruin it. It didn’t last long but the thunder definitely got loud enough to have woken me up had I been asleep. So I’m glad I’m up. I just wish I didn’t feel so damn lightheaded and could stop going from hot to cold and that my HR didn’t jump into the triple digits. I don’t know, maybe I am still in perimenopause. I just wish I knew how much of this could be connected to the meds. Damn, though! Just fucking damn! I am SO sick of not feeling well most days. I’m beyond sick of it! Since going to the doctor for the first time in over a decade I’ve felt worse, not better.

Tom should be making his way to Urgent Care soon now that we finally know where to go. I called Mercy yesterday and the bitch gave me the wrong location even though I told her what our insurance was and that we had a PPO. Tom went to our insurance company’s website and found a place that accepts our insurance. It’s still going to cost enough to make me think that maybe we should retire in a country that has universal healthcare because it’s just not going to happen in this country in our lifetime if it ever does. I don’t want to have to spend half our retirement on Healthcare.

Tom will need to get a new PCP. He’s certainly not going to go back to Dr. F since he wouldn’t even make time for him like any decent doctor should in a case like this. So he has to decide if he wants to stick with Mercy or go with Sutter. I thought we had to stick with one or the other but I guess not. It all depends on who takes our insurance and not the Medical Group itself.

Last night I had a strange dream that Kim was either sick or had some kind of procedure done and was recovering in some house or hotel I was staying in. Someone said I could stay with her if I wanted to but I guess I didn’t want to.

Then I had a long dream about Aly that wasn’t very good at all. First, Tom was on his way to bed, telling me he was worried he wouldn’t get enough sleep. I texted Aly then to tell her a female friend, who seemed to be a lot younger than me, named Lori, was picking me up to take us out to eat. I enjoyed her company at the restaurant and felt at the time that we would always be friends.

“Hey, when I want to hang out with a friend at 11 at night, what else am I supposed to do?” I said, glad to know she was available at that time.

Then Lori was driving me home and I reached into the back seat of her car where she had a huge pile of incense. I said I would just grab whatever I could reach first and she said “Patchouli.”

Patchouli was exactly what I grabbed, too.

Then she said, “Make sure you rub it all over your tits and have (some male name that wasn’t Tom’s?) lick it off.”

I laughed as if that was hilarious as hell.

Once back home, I found that Aly had ghosted me without any explanation at all. She disappeared from Twitter, disappeared from Prosebox, and her number was no longer any good. She had either blocked me or changed numbers.

If this became a reality it wouldn’t be the most shocking thing to ever happen to me since I’ve been dumped before, both with and without explanations, but I hope it doesn’t happen. Sure is hard to believe it would happen anytime soon if it ever did.

Good God. It’s raining, thundering, and 53°. So a motorcycle tearing through here was the last thing I would’ve expected today.