Well, so far I’m doing pretty well at cutting down on the smokes.

I spoke with Andy who read me a funny 6-page letter he’s sending to his friend Michelle. The one he lived with who’s gone to Michigan to be with her terminally ill father.

The spotting is tapering off once again, but who the hell knows what’s gonna happen? I guess I still think I’ll have a bit more of a period next month. By then my body should be back to normal. Especially with this limp dick around. Even if God changes his mind and allows me a child, am I gonna be able to get laid enough to do so?

My parents haven’t called and you know what I’m gonna say about them and that. Same thing I said about Jenny C. Why should either of us bother? We’re better off without associating with each other.

Later...

In a half-hour, I’ll be waking Tom up.

This having my cycle thrown off has kind of played on my emotions. It hasn’t been too, too bad, though, and I guess you could say that on a scale of 1-10, I’m affected by about a 4. This is the best I’ve felt physically, though, since the cycle went wacko. I feel less watery and my tits are a little less sore. My weight’s still up to 102, so that’s not cool. This shows I’m still “period constipated.” Usually, after a regular period, I’m 99.

Later...

Tom just went down on me and now he’s in the shower. He’ll be off to work in a half-hour.

He said I still had sort of an acid taste down there like I do when I have my period, but isn’t sure if it’s due to spotting or sweat, cuz I was walking on the walker to keep my mind off smoking. I said it had to be sweat due to not spotting for nearly 24 hours. Then he said it was time for my morning lecture and he reminded me that since I want a baby, I must remember that some things will be different. He said to expect changes and for some things to sometimes seem weird and unexplainable and don’t panic.

Is he saying he thinks I could be pregnant now? Well, I know I don’t know it all and that anything’s possible, but I think it’s OK and fair to say I’m 99.9% sure I’m not. Hopefully soon enough! I’m so afraid, though, to get my hopes up and am trying not to hope, due to past experiences we all know about.