Today’s one of those days where I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. The scale was up. There were no updates from Walter. I had a backache. I had PMS hunger two weeks before my period. I also had dreams again of renting. Oh, but I’m supposed to believe I’ll get my money and we’ll get out of here soon, right? Well, I’ve got a feeling we not only won’t be going anywhere soon, but we won’t be going to our top parks either.

Even though I had my main meal, the one I try to reserve for the middle to end of my day, I’m still hungry. For some reason, whenever I wake up really hungry, I could stuff myself all day but nothing curbs it. If it does it’s very short-lived. For the thousandth time, I gotta wonder just what the hell’s going on in my body to make it crave so much food. I don’t run 10 miles a day and spend the day doing a physical job. So why am I always so damn hungry???

Just got up and tossed down an additional 230 calories on top of my 350-calorie meal and I’m still hungry. :( I’m ready to take a Schläger to my stomach!

Later…

I had been kind of depressed the last couple of days, impatient about the move and feeling like it was never going to happen. I was torn between taking anything we could get and just giving up. I know the bastard above is going to continue to do all He can to hold us back and that owning is totally against His wishes for us, otherwise He wouldn’t have taken two places from us already.

Then Tom got home from work, went to turn the water on to the cooler since it’s supposed to hit 80° tomorrow, and sure enough the pump that was working just fine the other day no longer worked. I just knew there had to be a fucking problem with the thing like there is every single fucking year. Apparently, the cheap pumps only last a year and that’s what Jesse put in the thing last year. I was really worried at first, until Tom reminded me that cheap pumps don’t last long and that if the so-called breakage curse was living on through other people’s new to semi-new stuff, then it would surely break our own stuff once we moved.

Anyway, this pulled me out of my about-to-give-up mood and I said fuck what any God wants! I’m tired of all the problems around here – normal for old places or not – and listening to saws, hammers and other annoyances nearly every day. I’m going to have to listen to shit even in an adult community. I know that. But at least I’ll be doing it in a place that’s ours and that’s not so damn old and small. Today was actually quiet, though, probably because it was windy.

I realize that waiting around for first best may be a waste of time, and that’s fine. After Tom takes a shot at talking to the people at our favorite park, and after they turn us down, I’m willing to settle for almost anything. Even what we don’t want is what we do want. Meaning that even a place that’s old, not that nice, and in a less-than-ideal section of the park would still be heaven compared to this. I’d rather listen to people trim trees from our own place than someone else’s.

Speaking of trees, one went down in back. Actually, it was a large branch and not a whole tree. Thankfully, it’s out of the way and didn’t hurt anything.

Tom is going to call the park people tomorrow from work. He hopes to be able to meet with them on Saturday, but knowing how much something up there loves to delay things, they probably won’t be available till next week, which means he’ll have to put in for a day off since they like a week’s notice.

“We’re giving notice by May 1st,” I said to Tom after Jesse left. “No matter what, we’re taking what we can get and we’re getting the fuck out of here.”

He agreed. Enough is enough! We won’t have as many options if I don’t get my inheritance, but that’s ok. We’ll be happy enough with whatever we can get in the non-Beverly Hills of parks.

Meanwhile, the Jes pest has to return tomorrow around 10:00 to vacuum out leaves and other debris from his fucking cooler and to install a new pump. Watch, this time he’ll probably get an expensive one so the next people in here don’t have to deal with it for a few years if they can stand to stay cramped in here with such a noisy landlord for so long.

I really realize, though, that if we keep expecting to leisurely walk out of here and into first best, we could be here for months if not a year. Instead, we need to go crashing out of here head first and into what’s more like second best, but also more realistic, if we want to get out of here anytime soon.

Well, whatever’s up there can hate us, but it can’t stop us. We’re about to go crashing out and that’s that!