There goes Caddy Kid who I’ve only seen once in the last couple of weeks or so. What? Are we back to blasting by 3 times a day? We’ll have to see what happens when school lets out, but this may be no high schoolboy. It could be a 22-year-old going to a job for all I know. 

Paula left a message saying she doesn’t have a phone. Yeah, I knew it was just a matter of time before the ditz lost her phone. And yet she gets close to $1000 a month between her and that kid.

Got another package yesterday that was pretty much useless to me. All it had in it was a blanket, a few throw rugs, and a couple of knickknacks.

Believe it or not, I haven’t had anything but a few grapes, water, coffee, and vitamins in close to 24 hours. I haven’t shit today and am gonna get my period anytime now, so I’m all watered down, but so far, not so good. I haven’t weighed myself yet, but I feel like I haven’t lost a pound. It’s hard, but I have to do this. It’s the only way I’m gonna know if something’s wrong. Also, I thought about it and asked myself if I wanted to be thin again if I could, and be hungry all the time, or not be hungry and be fat. I decided that if I could get thin again by eating barely a bite a day, yes, I’d rather deal with the hunger. It’d be worth it. However, it looks like what my gut initially told me, is true. I think that if I don’t eat, it’ll keep me where I’m at, but if I go back to eating, I’ll eventually keep gaining weight. There is no “right” way to lose weight. At least not for me there isn’t. Starving’s all that’s ever worked for me, but like I said before, I don’t know if the weight loss would keep accelerating like before, once I started eating again. Eventually, I’m gonna have to have a little more than grapes, cuz this isn’t worth dying over either. Well, we’ll see, but I still think it’s now in my nature to be heavy and if that’s so, I’m not gonna put up with all this hunger just to stay big. If there’s no significant change in another day or so, I’m just gonna eat what I want and never worry about that or my weight again. I don’t know if I’ll exercise, though. Again, it doesn’t really do much for me, but maybe I’ll do it just to say I’m doing it.

The new AC/heat pump is now installed. I was right about the times. They came two hours late, and 3 hours’ worth of work, my ass. A freeloader came right before 8:00 and forklifted the AC off his truck and put it by the garage. At 8:30, two guys came and began prepping for the new AC by ripping apart the old one. It sure sent down a lot of dust through the vents (fortunately I didn’t have another attack, but we’re back to the 4-hour wake-up calls) and it sure sounded like they were gonna come right through the roof at some points. At noon, the crane came, and it was cool! First he pulled out some extensions to brace his truck from tipping over from the weight of the crane/AC, then he picked up the old one and set it down (someone came later to pick it up for scraps), then he brought up the new 500-pound AC and using hand signals, they put it in its place. Then they took an hour lunch and didn’t leave till 2:30. So they were two hours late and were here for 6 hours, but it was well worth it, and we survived.

The only bummer to them being here was that they made all that noise and not a damn soul next door was there to hear it. I guess this was a Monday that no one was there, cuz no one came to take the recycle bin back up. Well, it wouldn’t have disrupted their day anyway. They like noise.

It’s gonna be another erratic period for me. Yesterday I had spots for a handful of hours and since then, nothing.

Later…

I sat outside at the table and wrote for a little while. Although cloudy, it’s getting pretty warm out there, so I just came in. Tweety was out there singing till it got warm. He likes to go out and sing in the mornings. He’s a strange bird.

I left Andy a message asking how his new job’s going. He started yesterday. Hopefully, he won’t be a little slut with his coworkers and customers this time! Not a slut. I mean a flirt. He should get a job doing phone sex. That’d be the perfect job for him. He loves phones and next to talking about music and people he knows, he loves to talk about sex.

I’ll also have to ask Andy why Laura wanted my number. She called me (I thought it was him) and she said she hit the last number redial by mistake and got me. She assumed I was someone else calling, she said. After, I thought about it, and what she said made no sense. Couldn’t she just check her messages and see it was me who just called? She called me right after I called there. So I put 2 and 2 together and that tells me that she wanted my number. I should’ve thought to block my number when calling there, but didn’t.