Yuck! That dreaded weekend’s here once again. Am I gonna get lucky yet again? Or will there be more to hear than ball games?

El cocko just left on two semi-mild door slams.

I used the new squeegee that Tom bought to clean the back room windows.

My mom and I have been exchanging some fun messages. Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles are both blind black singers and at one point I jokingly said that I heard she went out with Stevie Wonder on a blind date. She said no, that was with Ray Charles.

I told her it was hard to picture her at 20 years old, and she said it’s hard to picture me at her age. Yeah, that’s hard, I’ll bet.

I asked her out of curiosity what my Jewish name is. She’s hunting for it, she says.

I found a way to feed just Blackie and just Blackie only. For a while there, I’d put the food on the patio right on the cement. He’d eat what he wanted while I guarded him against the other two. Then when he was done, in came the other two to finish off his leftovers. Not anymore, though. He loves to sit on top of the recycle bin, so using a dish, that’s where I’ll feed him. He let me pick him up and put him up there today, so it’ll be no problem getting him up there even when he isn’t. As for his leftovers, I’ll take them in, put them in a baggy, and refrigerate them till later.

I’m still not sure what to do as far as my weight goes. Do I give up now? Try to fight a little longer? Stop eating? Start smoking? I just don’t know, but for now, I’m still eating sensibly and still working out. So it seems, once again, that I’ve lost an inch in the hips and waist. Tom says it’s hard to tell if the gut deflated at all. My thighs are the same, but I’ve got a plan to work them harder. Even if I have lost an inch, I know it’ll be right back. It’s like something’s been teasing me. Jerking me back and forth. Just when it looks like my measurements are gonna drop for sure (I’m still the same weight) up I go again. I still say it’s hopeless. Exercising’s never done anything for me in the past, so why should it start now? It’s just like with most things I’ve ever wanted - I fail if I don’t try, I fail if I do try.

Tom had a class to attend yesterday at work. It was all about accepting that there are all different kinds of people - Jewish, black, gay, etc. We both think it was a stupid waste of time cuz you can’t make someone like/accept people they simply don’t like.

Later…

UPS brought two packages yesterday and one today. I’ve certainly gotten more packages in 1998 alone from them than I have in all the years I’ve been on my own since late 1985.

Again there were a lot of cosmetics. I kept some, but why she’d send me ash-blond hair dye, beats me. The color chart said it’d make medium-brown hair light brown. I thought about it for a minute there but then decided against it. If I were to dye my hair, I’d go darker and not lighter. She also sent that sunless tanning lotion that irritated me and made me orange.

There were belts, a scarf Andy may want, a pretty pink/purple sequined cap, potpourri spray, colored tumblers, candles, a flashlight, an air pump, an electric bug zapper, a mini travel alarm, a little rug, a speakerphone, 8 cute little photo albums, a wicker basket, the stand that goes to this chest she sent earlier, and more.

There were fashionable sunglasses with her name on its tag from when she sold those. They were too big for me and I didn’t really like their style compared to the ones I just bought at Venice Beach, but I’ll hang onto them.

There was a nice southwestern wind chime with a cowgirl on a horse, cactuses, and bells with stars on them. There were 3 cushions that went to who knows what? I used two of them for the bench swing outside and one for Blackie to nap on. The two license plates she sent were way cool. I remember them, too. They’re their old MA plates. One says DUREEN, the other ART•DOE. There was a picture of Lisa and another small wedding picture that wasn’t too dark. Two stuffed teddy bears. One said Happy Chanukah. A string of lighted dreidels, a shower curtain (or liner that can be used if ours rips anymore), and a really cool tile board. It’s heavy, in a wooden frame, and consists of 6 tiles. Tiles just like you’d find in a bathroom. There’s a teddy bear on it, a few flowers, and a couple of hearts. You write on it with dry-erase markers. There were also some wooden tulips with a yellow ladybug in a small wooden pot that I put next to the one of wooden carnations and a red ladybug that she sent earlier. There was a Jewish troll doll. It had a Star of David on its little shirt.

My favorite thing she sent was the Brita water filter system. Oh, I love it! No more needing to buy bottled water ever again. As I’m sure I’ve said, the tap water out here is disgusting. It tastes like bleach. This thing makes it tasteless like bottled water. It’s so simple, too. You just fill the pitcher with water and its filter up top takes care of it. All you have to do is change the filter every two months.

As for the collector’s items Tom got – well, it was just what I guessed it’d be. I was telling Tom how I’d never known them to be into coin or stamp collecting and figured it had to do with sports. I told him how my dad was to be a pitcher for the Red Sox till his heart doctor said not to, and how he was friends with Carl Yaztrimski AKA Yaz. I’m sure I spelled his last name wrong, but anyway, Carl was a well-known baseball player who was around my dad’s age. It turns out I was right and Tom got a poster, a picture, and a pin of Carl. However, I was half right altogether. Mom confirmed that Dad was never a ballplayer, but he was friends with Yaz.

In today’s stuff, there was a kite that I think I’ll hang onto till we move. Better to play with it out in all that open space than have it get hung up on a tree here, or maybe the freeloader’s house. Got a picture of Nana and Pa and one of Mom with Minnie Mouse. Also, there was one of Charlotte Rome holding Becky as a baby, with Lisa at around 4 years old next to her. This may be the only picture I have of Char, a lady I always loved.

Got a beautiful denim jacket with shiny stones on it, a 1998 planner, a license plate with flamingos and palm trees that I have by the computer, and funny signs. One says: I’ve been beaten, kicked, lied to, cussed at, swindled; taken advantage of and laughed at, but the only reason I hang around this place is to see what happens next! The other says: God put me on earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I’m so far behind, I will never die.

Lastly, they sent big and mini flags. Does she realize she’s duping me? I’ve got 3 cow flags, 3 ducks, and other dupes. Anyway, there was this really cute mini flag holder where you can put 3 flags in it. I put it up in the back room.

Fuck! Just when I thought Caddy kid disappeared - it’s back. I should’ve known better.

The freeloaders parked out front so it’s not in for the night unless it’s gonna stay parked there all night like it did before.

Later…

And the freeloader is gone. I’m sure it’ll be back between 8:00 - 11:00.