Tom soldered the electrical parts on the musical dollhouse kit. Time to start putting the final pieces together and be done with this long, tedious and very difficult project!

Made a red tube dress out of a red balloon for Dasha, my other porn star action figure.

They’re finally handing out masks at work due to the smoke as they should’ve done a week ago.

You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! I thought to myself last night at 12:30. I thought we were done with the motorcycles tearing through here in the middle of the night for a few months. It was 42° out! It sucks that I’m the only one bothered by this shit too, and that no one complains. I’m kind of tempted to do so, though I know it wouldn’t do me any good. It’s frustrating to live in a park that so obviously doesn’t give a shit about its residents. They could do something about the motorcycles but they choose not to so that’s why I haven’t complained. I know they won’t do anything. Part of me wants to confront whoever it is but I know that they too, won’t give a shit. Life has changed and so have adult communities. I have mixed emotions about never being able to go back 30 years or so. 30 years or so things were much quieter and there were fewer people, but technology sure did suck. There’s no going back though of course, so no matter where we live, it’s always going to be noisy. And if it starts off not being too bad, things will change. They always do.

My new noise-canceling headphones help but they’re heavy and clunky. I think at night I’ll just run air cleaners to drown out sound and save those for daytime noise which is louder with the exception of motorcycles, of course.

Tonight hasn’t been too bad thanks to having the air cleaner running on my desk and maybe the direction of the wind, but sometimes I’ll hear a plane or a big rig on the freeway. What I don’t get is the constant steady stream of traffic on the freeway that goes on and on all night long. We’ve been out in the middle of the night and there are way fewer vehicles on the road at 3 AM. So where is all this traffic coming from when I’m home at night?

Sometimes living with constant noise both day and night really wears me down. Even in the noisiest of places I’ve lived in in the past, I at least got peace at night for the most part. Also, many of the things I hear at this place, I didn’t hear there. Here there are so many different sources of noise and rarely do I get a pocket of silence where I get to hear nothing at all. I’m constantly forced to listen to noise. I’m forced to literally make noise in order to drown out noise by having to sleep with earbuds hissing white noise since my noise is still preferable to other people’s noise if I have to listen to noise at all. There’s always, always something. The only things we don’t get here are screaming kids and barking dogs, though I do hear car stereos on and off from the freeway. Those are worse in warmer weather. It’s 40° right now. We may get some rain over Thanksgiving. We need it!

Started to feel a little on edge yesterday, maybe due to the extra sugar I had. Today, although it’s just barely, I’m borderline anxious so I took a second magnesium capsule to see how it affects me. Two is the recommended dose anyway. If my anxiety escalates in the coming days and I’m still getting light-headed, I’ll probably drop the magnesium and return to Amberen. Really hope to hell this doesn’t happen! If it does then there’s either something about the medication no matter what the dose, menopause, something we don’t know about, or just the way I am as an older person, in which case all I can do is just learn to live with it and enjoy whatever days I can get off from it. I think I’m a touch down now with cabin fever, too. I need something different to throw into the mix of good things I’ve got going for me every now and then but I don’t know what that should be. Even if I did drive, where would I go? Where would I go right now by myself at 11 PM?

Wish I would stop getting all these backaches, too. I’m not sure what’s causing them but I’m making a point of working my core more often. Could be my mattress which is starting to sag a bit. Coil mattresses are definitely not the way to go. Being older and fatter I don’t trust that I wouldn’t get backaches on waterbeds, so I’m definitely going to get a good airbed one of these days, similar to what we had in Arizona. For now, I will go to bed on my saggy coil at around 7 AM and hope that the garbage trucks I never had to worry about waking me up in the past don’t wake me up…even with the earbuds. :-(