My anxiety was better last night than the day before, but I’m still having some. January and February were my worst months since being in Florida. So I’m not exactly starting off the new year on a great note. Finally decided to let Galileo know that my anxiety has increased. It definitely seems to be all about how much of the levothyroxine is in my system. I may have to go back to nothing but 75s, even if it means being hypo. I think there’s only so much of the drug I can get used to. None of the tools and tricks I have are helping (magnesium, meditation, etc). I have tried everything recommended to me and everything I could think of on my own and nothing helps which is leaving me feeling pretty hopeless as to ever being able to get my numbers normal without anxiety. I worry that the anxiety is going to persist as long as I keep raising the level of the drug in my system. I’m back to waiting for only a half-hour a day, but I think that a higher dose at just a half-hour is going to have the same effect as a lower dose and waiting an hour. Once it gets to a certain level in my bloodstream, I get anxious. In January, I had something like 6 anxious days. In February, I had 8-9. I just don’t know what to do anymore. Do I keep plugging along and hoping for the best or do I go back to all 75s? No, I don’t like feeling hypo, but I would rather that than anxiety. Really wish there was a way to tell how much of my hormones could have a part in this but I still believe it’s mostly the medication as much as I wish it wasn’t. I’m on nights now, I told them, but please send any suggestions they may have when they get a chance.

I swear it’s like something doesn’t want me treating my cholesterol and it only wants me partially treating my thyroid! If this is true, then why? Seriously, if it’s not happenstance, then why? Why? Why? Why?

I got up at 4:40 PM but was still tired, so I went back to sleep until 7. Tom said they were out all day across the street. Darren, Carrie, and their guests didn’t return until 10. I’m just glad the guests are still there. They’re keeping him off of the motorcycle. We’re going to have a few days down in the 70s and if they weren’t here, he would likely take it out, especially if he doesn’t like riding in the 80s.

They’re coming to inspect the AC tomorrow, so I wouldn’t be surprised if I got woken up.

I’m now 10% through my trip and have gone nearly 300 miles.

I made egg muffins for the first time, but they were a little dry and slightly overcooked. I’ll tweak the recipe and time in the future.

I had a bad dream and a good dream. The bad one was Tom suffering serious side effects due to some medication. Why am I having these shitty dreams about him all of a sudden?

The good dream was that I was walking somewhere, although I don’t know who I was with. It didn’t seem like Tom. I came across a cute little puppy that was determined to follow me. Even though I knew I shouldn’t and that it was stealing since it belonged to someone else, I took the puppy home with me. The person I was with didn’t seem too happy about it either, but I just had to have this puppy. When I got home and placed it on a bed so I could go fetch it food and water since I believed it was thirsty and hungry, I suddenly remembered that we had pet rats and a cat, and I didn’t want them to mess with the puppy when they were out and about. Then the dream suddenly ended, and I don’t know what I ended up doing.