Tom’s still working, believe it or not, and he should be home any minute now. He’ll be going in tonight later.

It really fucking pisses me off that I can’t even have the back door open for the fresh air and have any peace in doing so. I really wish someone would shoot those dogs. Even with the fan on I can hear the fucking things. There’ll just never be any peace from dogs around here, but again, it sure beats screaming kids, balls bouncing, and even more so, that bass.

At 8 PM last night, I heard someone get dropped off next door and saw lights on. It was probably her and the kid being dropped off by her dad. Maybe that house isn’t for rent and the dickhead’s just not been around too much for whatever reason.

A few days ago, we tried getting Bunny in his harness. The body part fits fine, but the neck part is still too big, so he slipped that part down onto his body. Tom had quite a time untangling him and Buns wasn’t too happy about it. After he freed him, he started to bite his toe, but Tom pulled away just in time.

There were a couple of other animal happenings around here too, but first let me get a couple of other things out of the way.

Robin recently told me that in about a month or so, a major change would be taking place. She said not to worry, though, it’s not bad. It’ll be OK.

Well, it is only a matter of days before the shit hits the fan again, isn’t it? And if it doesn’t hit the fan in a bad way, there’ll be something hectic going on that’ll steal our time away. Although, as I get closer to mid-cycle, I’m starting to get more nervous and I don’t really want him getting off around that time. I don’t want any bad or weird reactions to it (although both of us wouldn’t be surprised if I didn’t get a normal period, anyway). Nevertheless, I still feel a child isn’t meant to be and that it should remain as it is - just a dream, as much as we do want a child. Not all fears were meant to be conquered, sterile or not. I just don’t want any problems and if I could get pregnant, I’ll just lose it before 3-4 months are up, anyway, so what’s the point of setting myself up for such a situation to occur?

Tom feels that the way my periods have been since last summer is normal and he says he’s surprised they were as predictable as they had been for about 12 years. He said he thinks my body’s just in a typical reproductive state and says that he’s known women whose rags were just like mine are now before they had kids. He also says it’s common for women to skip periods or be two weeks late and is surprised I don’t go through this, too. Well, it just goes to show how abnormal my female parts really are.

Also, Larry says that little Larry may not have been the one who carved those wooden rabbits, which I guess is on its way. So, as I warned Tom, we may be getting a “fraud rabbit.”

In animal news, Gizzy escaped last night, as I had put a piece of screen over one of his tubes to stop him from chewing the plastic cap that was there. It’d drive me crazy and I could hear it all through the house. He chewed right through the screen, cuz it was fiberglass material and not metal. I set the trap up and realized God would be much more likely to send me my mouse back, then to give me a child, so I told God, “I know this isn’t exactly the most appropriate thing to pray for, but please send my mouse into the trap.” 

I was a bit worried he’d really smartened up and wouldn’t go to it, but more of me did feel he’d go to it. He did, thank God. God actually answered a prayer of mine! So, Gizzy’s back home and I put a cap over the tube and secured it was duct tape. Hopefully, he won’t break out of this, but I highly doubt it.

Then yesterday, a small bird of some kind was hurt. He tried to fly away, but he just crashed right back down. I put him in the old birdcage that’s in the outside patio room. He fluttered a bit and it looked like his wings or legs or both, were injured. Then I called my folks. Dad answered and I asked if he had any advice for me, since he’s got a small bird. He said, from what I described, there was probably nothing I could do. He got that one right. The bird died while we were on the phone. I put it in a bag after I hung up from Dad, and then Tom brought him out to the dumpster when he got home.

Dad brought up that dreaded subject. He said they still really want us out there and that they’d spring for the tickets. Oh, brother! I really don’t want to go. Then he said that if we couldn’t get there, they’d have to make arrangements to come out here. Right! I told him we already discussed CA in May when he has a week’s vacation, but weren’t even sure if we could do that. Not with the way there’s always something going on. There’ll be a 50/50 chance of us getting to FL, CA or anywhere. I’d rather they come here and deal with us on our turf. Tom did say he’d like to go to CA. I told Tom that I didn’t want to go to FL, and he said OK, then we won’t go. I asked him to think about it and, omitting what I think and want, tell me what he thinks and wants.

Later...

Andy will supposedly be here at 6:30, but I hope he isn’t full of it. I don’t want him to show up at 8:00.

Dad also told me I had another package on its way. He says it’ll be here tomorrow, but I don’t think they realize how slow UPS is. I expect it next Monday or Tuesday.

I was gonna go out back, but fuck that shit. It’s far from peaceful with those fucking dogs. They sound like they’re right there in the yard with me.

I had a weird experience last night. Tom was in the bathroom putting his contacts in, and I was at my work table. I work facing the wall where the kitchen doorway is. It’s a few feet to my left. I know I heard someone walk up to the doorway and let out a slight sigh. It wasn’t Tom, though. After he left for work and until I crashed, I had a feeling something was in here. I don’t know what it was, though.

Someone’s mowing out there now. It’s been nearly 80º lately, so the grass isn’t as dormant around here. Gosh, I never thought I’d live where grass is mowed in February!

When Andy comes over, I’ll be giving him NPNs to mail and his presents. And 4 barrettes for Laura. I’ll also show him my latest drawings, the pictures, and Gizzy’s new cage. He wants to see how the trap works.

Right now Gizzy’s holding and cleaning his tail. It’s so cute.

Tom went to bed at around 2:00. I have to get him up by 10:00.

Again, something’s gonna come up and it might as well be now. Now’s good timing, cuz I’d really prefer it if he didn’t screw me or get off for about a week. Well, he recently got off, so maybe he’s still spent from that.

I’m gonna start one of the journals Andy got me for my birthday now. The paper’s pretty slick in it, though, so hopefully my markers won’t get smudged like crazy.