I walked a little further for less time today. Went 2.6 miles in 40 minutes, rather than 2.3 miles in 45 minutes.

Damn! I still get these fucking dizzy spells every day. It’s like I’m lightheaded and it takes several minutes before it goes away.

Last night I said, “Well, I guess I’m gonna be an official fuck-up, cuz I’m gonna have a second TV dinner.” I was so fucking hungry. But it didn’t curb my hunger. The hunger stayed with me and it turned into nausea. I didn’t end up puking, but I learned from it. I learned not to eat more just cuz I’m hungry cuz it probably won’t do shit. Today’s been easier and I’ve been sticking to the plan - one TV dinner, a bowl of popcorn, some graham crackers, a few grapes. On top of my water, coffee, and daily vitamins.

I woke up at 119 and am now 121. No one should gain two pounds from just one TV dinner, some popcorn, and a few grapes and graham crackers, so maybe it’s water. I’m only a week away from my period.

I think I was right about the notches, though. Meaning, if I have periods of time where I barely eat for a few days, I seem to drop a couple of pounds. It’s still so hard to believe that there was a time when I couldn’t gain weight if I tried. Now it takes a massive effort just to stay right around where I am. I still don’t see myself down to 100 pounds. Not even down to 110, but oh well. I just hope my mother’s right about it getting easier with time to go on just a few bites a day, just like it got easier with time to not smoke. I think I will get used to it. I think I’m starting to already, but it’s too soon to tell for sure.

My allergies were picking up on me again, so I changed the mice’s cages. I spent nearly two hours working on the mice and the bird’s cage.

This weekend Tom will be tied up doing yard work and working on his car. At least he’s got the brains for it. His other family members may have better cars, better houses, better jobs, and better sex lives, but they don’t have better brains. Sorry he has to deal with shit that’s not exactly fun, but at least I don’t have to worry about any weekend sex games. There’ll be no time, and also, I told him I want him as a love partner and to spend my life with him, but not as a sex partner. I’m sick of the shit in bed I went through with him year after year.

Andy left a message saying he got hired at Red Lobster. Great. Hope he stays there for more than a week, too.

Marla’s at the beach now, but I’m sure she’ll find out about his new job. She said the beach next to Old Colony Beach was closed due to some bacteria found in the water. Well, she’s not about to go into the water even if they’re allowed to what with it being just a few yards away.