It was a very quiet Halloween around here last night. I only heard a few kids, but no one came to our door. We had the front light off. No outbursts from next door, either.

I made barbecued beef ribs all by myself after he went to bed and they came out great. Much better than the pork ribs and I’m not a sauce person, but my sauce was the best I ever tasted. I made it perfectly.

Great hair news, too. Tom mentioned seeing a commercial for something that’s supposed to repair split ends. I told him that as far as I always knew, you couldn’t mend split ends back together any more than you could with a nail that had been torn off. I agreed to try the stuff, anyway, and what a miracle! You put it on the ends of your hair when it’s damp and that’s what I did. Then, after it dried and I checked it out in the light, I expected to see no difference, but there was! I could find some splits, but I could also find lots of ends that weren’t split. Before it used to be that you had to look really hard to find an end that wasn’t split. I’d be lucky if I could find 3 ends that weren’t split in a rather large clump of hair. Now the only other unfortunate thing about my hair I have to deal with is how frizzy it is. Especially the parts that stem from the crown as that’s the driest part of the scalp. Hopefully, in time, this stuff will turn that frizz back into hair. I hate bushy, kinky-looking hair. If this stuff keeps on working well enough, it’s great to know that I don’t have to worry so much about the straightening iron killing it, since I can just bring it back to life with this stuff.

They’ve been having a Twin Peaks marathon for the last couple of days. All the episodes back to back. So I’ve been watching bits and pieces of that.

Our little job is going well enough. He got off, but in a very small dose and I got off just fine. I told him that if a couple wants what we want, does what we’re doing, and then ends up not succeeding, they’ve tried their hardest and have exhausted all their options. He says if a couple does this for 6 months, then they’ve tried their hardest and have exhausted all their options. Who in the hell could do that, though? I wonder if I could keep this job going for that long.

Well, that time I had that little mini miscarriage (and technically that’s just what it was) when I had that spotting, I had shit for PMS, so we’ll see. If the boobs are really sore and if there are enough pre-cramps, that’s the real sign. Anyone with sore enough boobs and pre-cramps is sure to be ragging.

The challenge is to get him off more often. If he got off more regularly, then who knows what might happen. That’s gonna be the ultimate key, though. Getting him off more regularly and at the right time. I think I’ll be mid-cycle on the 4th, so according to what I’ve heard, it’s to be more likely for anything to hook, if I’m OK and if God will allow it, between the 2nd and the 6th. When I’m 10-16 days after my period. Then again, it didn’t work for us when he injected me on the 10th, the 14th, and the 15th, so I still am really damn sure that no matter when we do it and no matter how much juice he squirts, it’s not gonna do us any good. I guess all I can do till I hit menopause is just enjoy and look forward to the times I’m right after my period. About a week and a half after my periods, my moods are so much more relaxed and happier. At these times I’m able to tell myself that yes, I want a child, but that just can’t be. And I can still function and get on with life. But before my period I feel like it’s the end of the world at times cuz I can’t have a child and it’s so much harder to function through all the anger, sadness, and frustration.