I just finished watching Unsolved Mysteries. It was ok, but I’ve seen better shows of theirs.

Earlier I worked as the office manager at Channel 57 for the second time. It’s very boring and tedious but it’s something to do. It’s a very easy job though I had feared before it would be difficult. There isn’t much that’s too hard for me. If you can learn to play a musical instrument and all the other things I’ve learned, then you can learn anything, although I hate anything dealing with numbers.

There are still times I wish I were straight and could have sex with a guy and enjoy it and be attracted to a guy as I am to women, but they’re such assholes. But then again, male or female, that is all I ever get anyway.

I’m taking a chance nonetheless. I sent Between Friends $70, but if I’m not attracted to any of these 3 women or they’re jerks or they’re decent and I lose them, then I think I’d be damn entitled to my money back. I guess if that happens, you renew your membership. Like hell I will. For $295? No way!

I’ve been taking only 5mg of Navane and I’ve been basically ok. Only a couple of bad times, but they passed; those racing thoughts that make me depressed.

Well, it doesn’t look like I’m going anywhere for Chanukah or my b-day. Tammy and I got into another squabble as usual and she hasn’t called. But I won’t be surprised if she does. It’s like Andy said to me, “You know you’re gonna make up with her.” No doubt she’ll call at the last minute. Actually, though, I’m really kind of hoping she’ll stay pissed and not call. I don’t think I want to go down there. Besides, I despise the fact of having Nerve drive me down and totally dread it.

The bus ticket price coming back is crazy and I also feel I’d like to celebrate alone. Once again I get that feeling of pride at not turning to anyone on my b-day. I’m really doing great at sheltering myself and keeping independent.

Andy or Nervous should be calling any minute now I guess.