From now on when I go to sleep at night and want to sleep straight through, I’m gonna take the phone off the hook. Nervous called at almost 1 AM and I said, “What the fuck are you doing calling me this late?”

Then he says, “It’s not late.”

Yeah, right. That’s how desperate he is. He sounded like he was about to get nervous as all hell. What makes people like him deny reality when they don’t like what they’re hearing or can’t get what they want? 1am isn’t late?

So, then again at 2:30 Andy called and he says, “I knew you’d be up.”

I told him I’m not always up this late. I was pissed.

Tomorrow I’m calling SS to see if I’m allowed to work a certain number of hours. I need the extra money and I’m going nuts.

Also, I definitely doubt I’m moving. Tammy and I just don’t get along and we are just two different people. Also, I’m very skeptical about the whole situation. I began to wonder if they weren’t gonna try to trick me into supervised apartments. So, I asked Mom if she knew their number. She said no. Then I asked her for their names. She said she didn’t know. I asked her if Tammy knew. Again she said she didn’t know.

So after I hung up I soon called Tammy and it was as if she expected my question when I asked her for the number. She said, “No. You’re not to have it. You’ve got to be patient and wait.”

I started to tell her I wouldn’t move then, cuz of my fears of getting tricked, but she hung up. After being tricked into so many other places, I’m definitely skeptical. Andy says I should be if she won’t even give me the number and that cuz I’ve had so many doubts for so long, I should stay where I am.

I just want to disown my whole family at times! I know I could never talk to my mom about this. Dad’s the only one I can talk to, but Ma gets in the way and Tammy’s so much like her. She’s just another Dureen.