Gosh, I really wish I could get some weight off! 10 pounds, just 10 pounds. I’d gladly settle for just that at this point. I had 3 pairs of long pants that fit, but one’s now too tight and the elastic around the other ancient pair stretched out and broke. So now I have just one pair of winter pants. I’m going to try again to make one last attempt to lose weight, but I just don’t know if I can do it. I haven’t been able to lose weight for 2 or 3 years now. I’m going to try to keep myself on a day schedule for as long as I can and walk outdoors for a half-hour to an hour every day while I limit my calories to about 1200 a day, excluding coffee and gum. The walking should burn anywhere from about 100-350 calories. I wish I could walk outside year-round at any time of day or night, but with no moon, I could never see where I was going and it’d be too dangerous to walk during the summer nights when it was cooler because that’s when the rattlers are most active.

When I’m done with the laundry and exercising, I’m going to run through the final proofreading of my story which is now done. It’s a short story, but I think it came out well even so. It’s quite suspenseful. There’s more murder and less sex in this one, I suppose you could say.

I don’t know if Mary will like it. She strikes me as the type to prefer romance over murder mysteries and suspenseful stories such as I tend to write.

My nose treats came yesterday, but so far they all seem to smell the same. The grape one does sort of smell like what it’s supposed to be, but for the most part, they seem to smell more like smoke, like incense, than anything else. Nonetheless, this glorified cigarette smoke is okay, I guess. It covers any foul odors and I’ll definitely use them all up. I just don’t think I’ll ever make a second order. The things smell better unlit than lit. I guess they are breakable too since they’re such flimsy sticks. That’s why they wrapped them in newspapers.

Now for the best and most shocking news of the day. Little Buddy’s picture, “Hiding Amongst the Bottles,” made the finals in the photo contest!!! This is the picture of him peering up from inside a box of bottles when I was doing community service. I photocopied the letter for Mary, though I don’t know if it’ll make it in to her. If not, I’ll just tell her about it, but anyway, it was cool to see the picture’s title with the copyright symbol and my name along with it. I guess within the next month the judges are going to make their final decisions. One person gets the $1,000 prize while 40 people get a silver medal and 73 get a bronze medal. Then someone gets the annual prize of $10,000.

So my Little Buddy, now dead almost a year, shines on from beyond the grave. How I still miss him so! I remember I cried hysterically when I was around 14 and I lost my first guinea pig, Penny, yet I quickly got over it. Never has a pet touched me so much that I can still shed tears for him a year after his death. Meanwhile, I couldn’t cry for Scuttles, Houdini or Ratsy no matter how hard I tried and I loved those rats dearly. Same goes for Piggy who we had for 4 of the 6 years we lived in the Phoenix house.

I’d be both surprised and not surprised to win a medal because it’s not money. However, I can’t imagine God allowing me to win any of the money prizes. The most I’ve ever won was $25, so $1,000 or more would be quite a jump from that. I’d think it’d count as me making money and that’s an obvious no-no.

Later…

Now I have the vanilla nut burning. Once again, I’d never have guessed that that’s what’s supposed to be burning. It just smells like fancy smoke to me. So far the only one that had a subtle smell of a distinct kind was the grape.

My tight pants are good for walking. That way I know they’re going to stay put. I take the mace with me just in case a big dog decides to get a little too friendly on me, but neither of us has had a problem yet with vicious dogs, so I doubt we ever will. If you go onto a dog’s territory, that’s one thing, but when they come onto yours, it’s another. I counted this time and determined that it took 4 minutes to make a rotation and not 3 which means 15 rounds would equal an hour of walking. Damn, it’d take close to 10 minutes to walk around the land’s perimeters!

Anyway, I’m making one last try to get down to 120 pounds which is just 7 pounds away. You think to yourself – 7 pounds? That’s nothing. But it most certainly is when you have no metabolism and are my age. I’m worlds away from 120, trust me. I may as well be asking to lose 70 pounds and not 7.

In a week or two Tom will be quitting his job. He’s going to have to in order to be available for job interviews for jobs that pay better. At least, like he said, this is the prime time of year for finding jobs, and I did have positive money vibes between November 23rd and December 27th, but I’m not a fortune psychic, so I don’t know if I trust my vibes. I didn’t sense making the finals, that’s for sure! I’m only sensitive to grim happenings, so it seems. That affects people’s health and seeing past events and places I’ve never been to.

Later…

So far the only incense sticks that are okay are strawberry, grape and sexy. I think I really would prefer the perfume bottles, sprays and scented cartridges. That way I can have the smell without the smoke. In fact, I emailed them and asked if I could return what I haven’t used, but I doubt they’ll go for it. I think they’ll only take things back that are damaged.

Meanwhile, I found a small gift set for $19 at Walmart with White Shoulders perfume, body lotion, and some other little bottle of cologne. I hope I can get it in person. That way we can get out of the shipping costs. See, this is why I wish I weren’t a doll collector or was getting more spending money per month. Think of all the new clothes, perfume and other items I could get if I didn’t have to tie up so much of my money with dolls because of how expensive the ones I like are.