Despite Tom’s always being overly optimistic, I have to give him the fact that I don’t know computers like he does. So if he says the program’s looking more and more promising by the minute, then I have to trust and believe him. This is a far different thing than when he’d tell me he wanted a kid when we knew he didn’t.

I had a funny thought earlier. Well, say our spirits really can float around and check on those who are still alive after we die, and say Doe and Art go belly up in a decade or so. Imagine them checking on their dogs first, which is what they’d do knowing them, then their friends, then family. Well, they sure as hell would be in for quite an eyeful when they got to checking on us! Especially if we really do get rich. This brilliant idea is all his, but I wonder if I “wrote a jinx” and helped? When I wrote Doe & Art I thought it’d be best to make like we were doing well financially so the real message – don’t forget to leave us some money when you assholes die – wouldn’t seem obvious. (though the Queen and Miss Perfect probably took the genuine pleasure of telling them how broke we were) I simply said we won a substantial amount in a sweepstake, though I didn’t elaborate. Besides, no matter what the real case was, I wasn’t about to be like – while you’re no doubt still living high off the hog, I’m still the same old underdog, a poor old loser, losing houses, losing land, getting shit on by society, living like a bum, sleeping on floors, scraping pennies, etc. Ah, but in the end, the underdog really does come out on top at times!

Meanwhile, do I regret the past? Well, sure it’s easy to say I wish I’d done certain things differently, but nah, I don’t think I really regret it because to say I did would be saying I wish I’d been perfect which would mean I’d have to be inhuman.

Tom didn’t see the dog when he went grocery shopping last Saturday, and he left late, which means that if by some freak chance they allow it indoors overnight, it certainly would’ve been out for the day by the time he rode by. So I guess it really does just visit a lot. Why people up here feel the need to take their dogs everywhere they go is still beyond me. Makes me wonder if they’re going to pass a law allowing them to be taken to work!

The animals are already back in school, I’m surprised to see. After all, it’s still August, and I know I never began school till right after Labor Day.

I made the stupid mistake of spending $30 on these pills called Hoodia, which is from a cactus plant, hoping against hope that they’d take my appetite away like the Claritin did and like they claim they do, but nope. Once again, my body’s completely out of my control. It’s either go hungry or get fatter, and I think I’m just about ready to eat a normal 1500-2000 calories a day and let myself gain another 30 pounds or so cuz I’m sick of stressing over it. Sometimes the best way to deal with a problem is not to deal with it at all. Especially when the aids that really work are either illegal or require a prescription. These Hoodia pills are backed by Oprah. Should’ve known better than to trust the word of a black.

I’m still having loads of fun with my incense, but am having an awful lot of sticks go out on me and I have to relight them. I wonder why?

My dolls came yesterday and look gorgeous all set up on display! The big 22” American Model is more impressive than I thought she’d be. The best of the 16” ones are definitely Aqua Angelina, then Carrie. Emme, the plus-size doll, is nice, too. The only ones that aren’t quite as dazzling as I expected are the Sydney and Barbie dolls, though they’re still plenty nice enough.

My palm tree died recently. I’m surprised. It had been doing so much better since coming to this state, so I don’t know what killed it. Maybe it got too big for its pot, though no roots were sticking out that I could see. Oh well. I’ll get new ones, probably fake, sometime in the future. Plants aren’t a high priority right now.

I wrote Paula a letter, but as I told her, I’m dropping my letters to once a month. I just don’t always have anything new to update her on every week or two, and she rarely answers any of my letters, so I think monthly letters will be sufficient enough. The cutback in stamps will help make up for the $9 package I’ll be sending in a few months consisting of unwanted incense, a few oils, that snot green bracelet I won, a dull purse, and a glow-in-the-dark celestial mobile.