Got a missed call this morning from a blocked number, but Tom says he gets those all the time. I still don’t expect to hear from Andy, but whatever’s meant to be will be. Unless Marla didn’t get the letter, though, perhaps she just has yet to get a hold of him to tell him about it, or maybe he’s taking his time to think about it.

Now that I’ve found this really cool online journal, I don’t have much to say lately. I guess that’s a good thing, though, cuz usually, when I have a lot to say, it’s not very good.

I just hope Tom gets a job real soon and that we get our savings back up. I’d like to always have at least a couple of grand after the rent’s been paid. That way, if the transmission went out on the car or something like that, we’d be covered. If it went out right now, though, we’d be pretty damn screwed.

I just wish I could stop worrying that the past is going to return to haunt us! Nearly losing your life really leaves your emotions pretty tangled up. I’m more appreciative of the good things, but I’m always paranoid and worrying, too. I’m still having “motel nightmares,” and I know it’ll probably be a while before they back off. The same thing happened after jail. I had all kinds of dreams about being stuck back there, and now I’m stuck back in that damn motel room all over again, writing my “death note,” giving details of what happened and family contact info for whoever was to find our bodies.

sighs I think I’ll go try to work on my book for a while.