I knew I’d wake up a zillion times. That’s because I slept well yesterday, and after every time I do sleep well, I sleep shitty the next day. Ida woke me up a few times today, and again I explained to her that she needs to settle down. I’ve let enough of her wake-up calls slide. Tonight I’m waking her up with my radio, even though she didn’t wake me up intentionally.

I could hear the rude black nurse long before she even got up here with her loud are-you-OKs? Miss Are You OK pretended not to see Ida waving her away this morning and bopped the door a few times anyway.

As has been the case all my life, there’s nothing I can do about it when it comes to people who are either abusive or rude to me. They always have the upper hand and I never have any say as far as their actions go. All I can do is live with this bitch’s shit like I had to in Phoenix and like God so obviously wants me to, for the next 13½ weeks. I wonder, though – are they going to spite me out of my inhaler because I grieved the damn bitch?

Another one of many wake-up calls this morning was them bopping around on the roof again (God’s having me be woken up for every time the fan kept me from being woken up by the freeloaders in the Phoenix house). Yesterday, after realizing it had been fairly pleasant in here for a few days, I wondered if the AC might be broken again. I’ll know if it gets cold in here tonight.

A couple of plumbers were here again today, and the water’s still warm. Not as warm as it should be and people would like, but warm enough.

Dixon, a chubby black girl, was on today. She’s cool, but I rarely see her. Hann’s on now. She’s cool, too.

My Chapstick ran out on me faster than I thought it would, so Mary gave me what little she had left of hers for some red lipstick. I peeled some off and put it in a piece of plastic.

I forgot to mention that Tom said both Butter Rum and Oreo finally died. The same day, too. So they lasted a little over a year till their tumors got the better of them.

This may sound funny, but even though jail, Brattleboro, and Valleyhead (private schools) are all hell on earth, I’d easily pick jail out of the 3 because at least they leave you alone here. You can sleep when you want, stay up all night, and in a sense, there’s more freedom in jail, as funny as that may sound. They don’t run us ragged here with classes, sports and groups 15 hours a day. Also, I knew when I’d be getting out the day I came here. But I didn’t know I’d be in the funny farm I was in for 5 months, and I didn’t know I’d be in the private school I was in for 2 years.

Melinda’s back next door with Deanna, Marilyn and Mary. Mary’s not happy about it at all, either. Melinda won’t last long there. She can’t get along with anyone anywhere. Deanna had moved downstairs to be with Lisa, then Dixon sent her back. Apparently, Lisa’s a keep-away because they think Deanna and Lisa like each other a little too much.

Ida was helping that old woman make a phone call. Julia is her name, and no, she doesn’t know sign language. She can talk and she can hear. She just can’t hear well. I hope to be her celly when Ida leaves. She says she doesn’t like to talk much. I hope this is true, although people have a way of saying they are what they aren’t (I would later be glad we didn’t end up cellies).

Poor Ida. She is not happy right now. She’s constipated and she has hemorrhoids she says she ruptured and is in a lot of pain right now. She’s pissed and bitching that CC went to medical within hours of pointing out a rash she had because she’s black. She says you get things faster if you’re not white because they’re afraid you’ll cry racism if you don’t. She says that maybe we whites ought to cry racism for a change. Yeah, maybe we should. That’d be stooping to their level, but she’s right – minorities have become the majority and they are getting the upper hand. There’s no happy medium when it comes to anything in this world. People either have no rights or too many rights. It hardly seems fair that while they can have their black pageants and their Spanish radio stations, we can’t have a white anything or else we get called racists. They definitely have the upper hand in the courts, that’s for damn sure. I, too, hate anyone in the system, be it pigs, lawyers or judges. They all ought to be shot.

We had beef patties tonight and last night. Sure beats weenies!

Hopefully, Ida will shut up long enough to let me read. Then I’ll listen to more music, which is what I do most of the time, anyway.

It’s around 10:00 right now and still too noisy to sleep. These allergy pills do make me slightly drowsy, but not as much as I’d like them to. I miss my Melatonin! I recommended it to Ida, letting her know it’s an all-natural thing. She has trouble sleeping, too.

Just a little while ago we heard that same loud banging I’ve heard in the morning. Ida and I still aren’t sure where it’s coming from. Could they be working on the roof at this hour? I don’t see how it could be next door, or below us.

Myra finally shut up. God, that girl drives me crazy after dinner until around now. All she does is laugh the night away with this high-pitched laugh that sounds like a dog yipping. And what the fuck is so funny anyway?

Earlier, when Hann brought Ida some stuff for her constipation, I said I’d have to scare the shit out of her. Both Hann and Ida got a kick out of that one.