I am still sad over the loss of my Blondie but doing better.

UPS just brought me that Christmas scrapbooking prize that I really couldn’t use in any way. Guess I’ll yard sale it someday.

For the first time in ages, I’m actually a bit bored. I’m caught up on my sweeps and don’t have much to update on other than the fact that tonight’s the night we order the bed and a new office chair. Watch, the bed won’t do a damn thing to rekindle our lost appetites, but oh well. At least I don’t have to worry about conceiving either way. At this age, sex just isn’t a high priority for me. Making money, winning prizes and going shopping are what we both live for these days, and having as much fun along the way as possible. Still, I’ll do what he always said was the magic cure for his so-called problem, which I still think was always intentional, and not say anything about his not cumming, and as time goes on, assuming we get it on more than once or twice, time will prove that the problem was never me, but rather his fear of impregnating me. I’m sure that even if I had a full hysterectomy today, however, he’d still hold back to cover the truth. I have mixed feelings about his not allowing himself to cum these days. I don’t want him to because that way I know I couldn’t get pregnant, not that I ever believed it was in my cards to do so in the first place. On the other hand, it still adds a sense of non-normalcy to my life, and I’ve got enough of those. How many people wake up to the sound of a pin dropping? How many can’t sleep with other people? How many can’t keep a schedule? Even so, if the choice were mine, I’d prefer him to hold back. Keeps the sheets drier if anything!

Unless something up there is teasing the hell out of us really bad, there is a distinct possibility that he could end up making a ton of money at this place. To think that Oregon, which I’d quickly come to hate with a passion, could possibly change our lives in such a huge and wonderful way, is pretty mind-boggling.

I don’t know if the mailman’s just late or if we simply didn’t get anything today. I could really go for a movie right now, so I doubt one will show up anytime soon.

I’m beginning to doubt I’ll see the DVDs I won, but oh well. That happens sometimes. I just better get the guitar I won in 2-3 weeks like they said I would!