I’ve lost a pound so far, but I expect the rest to come off very slowly if they even come off at all. It should take years to do this method, but I’m in no hurry. Doing this has gotten me to see that I was definitely eating more than I realized. I was probably closer to 2000 calories a day as opposed to 1500.

Still feeling calm and sleeping well, although last night I did awake with a nightmare. Tom and I were giving me an injection of some kind. I hesitated and wondered if we should tell the doctor something up front, though I was not sure what I wanted to tell them. But we went ahead and injected whatever it was and it made my heart race. I woke up with my heart racing a little for real and felt warm too, but I settled down and returned to sleep after I used the bathroom.

Dr. G responded to my message and said to stop using the steroid gel and we’ll reevaluate the situation when I see her, saying that every now and then it can cause inflammation of the skin. NOW she tells me, but yeah, I stopped last week. I could tell it was caused by the gel, just like I could tell the thyroid meds were causing me to feel anxious.

Tom’s 3-D pen came yesterday and it’s pretty cool. He did a little tree his first time around and it was funny because the bottom was bright lime green while the top was the color of pasta and tomato sauce. It was funny because it almost looked like a clump of angel hair pasta that someone squirted ketchup on. He’s got more filament with more colors arriving today, along with my dark brown Swarzstar coloring shampoo. It’s supposed to be a lot easier to use, a lot less messy, a lot quicker, and a lot gentler on the hair.

The reason it was so quiet here yesterday was that the workers were finishing up further down the street. Tuesdays are usually bad for landscaping, though, so I’m sure I’ll hear enough of that at some point. I’ve already heard some things around here.

I also had a dream that Bill was still alive and about to divorce my sister. The girls were the age they are in real life but were living with them. Sarah seemed really down one day and I asked her what was up.

“This is about your father, right?”

Then she was in my arms sobbing.

Then there was some woman that I “trapped” in a sleeping bag. I guess she had been sleeping in or around our property. One time I found her asleep in her sleeping bag inside the house. Although I couldn’t see the woman because the sleeping bag was huge and covering her, it was unzipped. I slowly zipped it up. The woman began to stir and I was trying hard to hold the sleeping bag in one hand and squeeze the shit out of her with the other.

“Hey!” I called to Tom, hoping he would come and hold the bag so I could kick it silly. But he never answered and the dream ended with me calling for him.