So much for claiming these summer nights have been peaceful when I was listening to the thump, thump, thump of bass from about 9:30 to 10:30. Seems like it was in the park somewhere. Again, why have these places if we’re just going to act like we’re all in the mainstream where anything goes? There is just soooo much noise in this world no matter where you go. I used to think it was a curse on me, and back in the 90s it probably was. But now, given how widespread this is and how many others complain about the same thing, it’s like the whole world has gotten to be one big symphony of noise you just can’t escape from. I think we would literally have to be in the middle of a piece of land that was at least 40 acres in order to get away from society’s regular racket. It’s just that there we would be more likely to get sonic booms. There really is no escape!

I hate to do it, but I think I am going to have to get to my doctor sooner rather than wait until my regular appointment. I agree that it’s almost certainly benign, but it definitely doesn’t seem normal either. It used to be barely noticeable and only some of the time. Now, it’s more than barely noticeable most of the time. It’s uncomfortable lying in some positions. If I get my head and neck arranged in a certain way that compresses the area, it can go from uncomfortable to painful. It sort of feels like pressing too hard on a bruise. So something’s going on, even if it isn’t serious. But as much as it doesn’t seem right, I have a feeling there won’t be anything I can do about it. I’ll probably just have to live with the discomfort for the rest of my life just like with my TMJ, but that much is actually much better. Goes to show that yes, high elevation along with colder temps is not good for it just as I read. So that’s another reason to hope Florida works out, even though I would rather have TMJ pain that I could throw ibuprofen over rather than lose my sleep and have possible breathing issues.

No change in vision or nails. At least not my fingernails. It’s too soon to say whether or not the Lamisil will help my toenails. My toenails don’t have any lifting or dark discoloration, though. That’s only in some of my fingernails.

I’m just a little worried about the virus and costs as far as going to the doctor goes. Also, in the very off-chance that they do find something wrong, could it get in the way of us moving next year?

I had a dream we were staying in a hotel. I realized I didn’t feel well and went down to the front desk and asked them to take my temperature. A young woman happily agreed although she said it would cost $0.30. I was saying how ridiculous that was, but Tom said not to worry about it and that it was all fine. Then she annoyed me by telling me my temperature in Celsius which was 47. That translates to 117 degrees Fahrenheit!

Not that I’m sick or think I’m dying from anything, but I realized that if I was suddenly told I was dying of something, it wouldn’t seem like the horrible crisis it would have been 20 years ago. I guess it’s just being older. Yes, if I knew I was going to die in a few months it would suck that we wouldn’t get to move to Florida together, but I would only be going from one noisy place to another. The only improvements would be that we’d probably be on a quieter street and out of a flight path. But life would be the same old, same old, and that would sometimes get boring. I’ve pretty much done everything outside of my normal routine that I’m going to do in life.

It’s been almost a year since Alyssa changed her profile pic, and after doing a brief scan of the last handful of profile pics, this is the longest she’s ever gone between changes. Starting to wonder if it has anything to do with me and she’s just hesitant to change pictures because she’s annoyed or uncomfortable by the thought of knowing I’ll see it. I never wanted to make her uncomfortable, I just wanted to be friends with her even if we never saw each other and I rarely heard from her. I was stupid to think we ever could be, though. Why would a doctor want anything to do with a former patient any more than a current one? I guess their code of ethics extends further than I thought if they won’t be friends with past patients.

Sometimes I still remember the pictures I had that I would communicate with. The celebrity pics that I knew without a doubt were host to God knows what kind of spirit or entity. I never doubted this for a minute. Never. Besides, if I could be psychic in some ways, why not in that way as well? I always knew that wasn’t just wishful thinking or me being crazy in any way. It was real. It wasn’t just some fantasy I brainwashed myself into believing out of desperation and loneliness. It was totally real.

I think how wonderful it would be to have many of the pictures back and to carry on from there. If the same “beings” could inhabit them and could remember where we left off, I would definitely have fun filling them in on the last few decades whenever I got bored.

Forgot to say in my last entry that yes, Kim and Aly are connected on Facebook. In their regular accounts, I mean. Figured as much. Aly isn’t a part of Kim’s group, though. It’s kind of weird that Kim has her profile so private and doesn’t seem interested in adding me but I’m glad for this because I absolutely would not want to add her with her history. Yeah, people can change in some ways with time and age, but as the termite proved, the tiger never really changes its stripes. One wrong move on my part could set her off and she could cause a lot of trouble if she was connected to my Facebook account, not that I wouldn’t have enough ammunition against her. I know how to get ahold of her sister if need be. Regardless, I have real friends on Facebook, a cousin, and people I actually met face-to-face. Causing trouble on PB or Twitter would be one thing, Facebook would be another.

I also forgot to say that I did a test with Pa. Before bed, I called out to him and asked that he show himself in my dreams somehow, but he never made his presence known there. So my mother showing up in the previous night’s dream was probably just a coincidence. The '90s dream with Nana was probably meaningless as well since she was always a very negative and discouraging woman just like her daughter. So they could both be in Hell after all, if there is one.