Friday the 13th has brought about a sad change. Mary’s gone, but I’ll explain in a sec.

First of all, Fisher got a kick out of how I wrote how many days I had left on the back of my envelopes.

I saw a canine dog out in the hall. Probably sniffing for drugs in Alpha.

I’m wondering why it is that the juvies haven’t been in school lately. Maybe they’re on vacation, although I find it hard to believe they have “vacations” in jail. Inmates that work don’t. In fact, most jobs are 7 days a week.

I don’t think they should get special privileges just because they’re minors, like having the computer room. Why should they? Most adults did just as much to get into this jail as they did to get in here.

Out of the many times I was woken up, one of them was due to Jamie screaming at the nurse on her hour out. The nurse ignored her, I guess. When I asked her to be quiet, she told me to go fuck myself.

I’ll remember never to chat with her again or do her any favors.

Jamie’s new celly, who seems a lot saner than she is, sure does have beautiful hair. Long, straight, even and healthy.

I got up for the last time at 10:30 when I heard yelling coming from down in the big tank, and once again, there are 3 empty beds, soon to be 4. Apparently, the black bitch went off on Glenn, the intake DO, and Mary got into it with both the bitch and Peaches. The bitch left first for A Tower, and Wilder left Mary sitting down in the dayroom.

“What’s going on, Mary?” I called down to her.

“I asked to move up with you, but I’m going to A Tower.”

Sure enough, I saw Wilder on the phone, then I saw her pull her card. She rolled her up and she was gone. I’ll probably never see her again, though I do intend to write to her.

I asked Wilder why she couldn’t have put Mary in here, and she said, “Because I don’t do what inmates tell me to do, and I don’t do it based on threats.”

Whatever.

My only worry is fucking Jamie. I thought I heard she was on restriction again. If she is, Chambers will come and swap us. The nut’s 30 days are almost up and I asked her the other day if she was going to return to the tents. “No,” she said. “I need to stay here to punish myself so I don’t fuck up again because this is more jail-like than the tents are.”

Not compared to A Tower, it ain’t! A Tower is so jail. So loud, so filthy, so big. If M were a kitten, A would be the lion. This pod’s square footage isn’t much bigger than our Phoenix house. A pod in A Tower is like 2 or more of our Maricopa house.

As always, I have mixed emotions about staying here, but at this point, I’d prefer to stay here than go to A. It’s mostly because of Teddy Bear. It really gives me peace of mind knowing someone here cares about me. She’d probably even lie for me if A Tower called over wanting to know how many empty beds there were, and yeah, there is something between us. There’s no denying it now. I just don’t know the extent of it yet, but I think I’ll eventually find out.

Anyway, my first instinct was to cuss Jamie out, threaten to break Peaches in half for driving Mary out of here, and be rather cold to Smith and Wilder (I don’t know why they have two DOs on today. Neither of them is training, and this isn’t Pancake Face Smith. This is some skinny butch I’ve never seen before). This didn’t happen, though. Instead, I ended up chatting with both Myra and Peaches, and Smith and Wilder were way too nice for me to snob. They’d smile or wave when they’d walk by, offer to help me carry the stuff I bought from the coffee cart, etc. I met Wilder, who’s always been cool, the night I came here and was in the intake area.

Myra’s as sad as I am about Mary’s being rolled out of here. Peaches says she’s bonding out Sunday, but will have to return to court and will probably get 4 months. We were discussing different DOs, and I hope I didn’t make a mistake when I mentioned Teddy Bear’s kicking Silvia out so I could be alone. Peaches seemed jealous. See, I know she has a thing for Teddy Bear. She just won’t admit it.

“I don’t think they can do that,” she said, but like Myra pointed out, they have the power.

I asked Smith not to put anyone with me if she could help it, and she asked why. I told her it was because I’m not a people person.

“You’re doing fine with me,” she said.

That’s because I don’t have to live with her in this tiny little room.

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Out goes Smith and Wilder and in comes Bunch. Every time I see it’s not Teddy Bear, I get a little bummed.

Now that I’m able to stand to think of Tom, I wonder how he is. He’d still be at work. I’ve always wondered/thought about him. It’s just that now I can do it without getting so damned depressed.

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I’m sooooo psyched! Teddy Bear’s on!!!

The juvies were picking on poor Teddy Bear. They were holding the door as she was trying to unlock it. She set them straight real fast and yelled, “Let go of the door or you’re all on lockdown!”

They let go really fast.

To me, all the sergeants have seemed like mean, strict, power-hungry assholes with no sense of humor, but that wasn’t the case with the dude that was here earlier before Teddy Bear showed up. He cracked me up. I asked him what happened to Bunch and he goes, “I shot her and buried her in the basement.”

The best news is my letter from Tom! He said he’s been really busy, the PO Box wouldn’t open, and of course, Visitation was canceled. He said he was sorry he wrote a letter complaining, but with all the complaining I’ve done to him, he oughta do some complaining of his own for a change!

I also got a really nice note from Helen and a beautiful card from Ida. They were both brief, saying they hope to hear from me as soon as I get out.