Slept better than I have in days with only two interruptions. One was the nurse and the other was Mattie’s voice. Underwear exchange didn’t happen till nearly 11:00, and the coffee cart was a no-show.

When Vasquez got me up to hand me my chow, she asked how many days left I had before I could even tell her.

She gave me two lunches, too.

On my hour out I was chatting with Mary, Myra and Peaches. Myra had an Appaloosa, a gelding and a thoroughbred when she lived in Montana, and recommends a 12-14 hand horse to start with like a Tennessee fox trotter.

Yes! Johnson’s on now!

---

Before I could ask Johnson, she asked me how many days I had left as soon as she came to the door. I told her to guess, and she guessed 23. I knew she’d be wrong, but like she said, she was close.

Then it was time to play my joke on her. I told her that I had a dream they took away my stripes and made me wear a g-string bikini while she was on. She said, “Oh, no.” Then as expected, she blushed.

On her next walk, I told her I was only kidding about the dream because I just wanted to see her blush. For a minute, as she was checking the water well right before I told her this, I could’ve sworn she looked at me with a fury in her eyes that said she wanted to kill me. It really shocked me and was so weird.

However, as I told her, I did have a nightmare that both she and the evil-looking one were in (she knew I meant Palma). She said, “Oh, no. Though I’d rather be in a weird dream than a nightmare.”

In the dream, Johnson and I were down in the dayroom talking when Palma came in and asked if I liked Johnson. I said yes and that she was my favorite DO. (she just about is now, too) Then Palma said she was going to kick my ass! So I ran behind Johnson screaming, “Don’t let her get me!” Then I woke up.

“That’s good,” Johnson said. “Before I had to use my karate.”

I wonder if they teach them karate at the training academy? I bet they never prepared her for someone like me at that academy!

After a couple of walks, I stopped her because I remembered another joke to tell her, but as soon as she opened the door, she started telling me about the mice she used to have. So after we swapped rodent stories for a few minutes, including the one where Houdini jumped into bed with Tom, I told her the joke. This one had her laughing the hardest. I asked if she knew any and she said she hears so many that she forgets them, but will try to remember some for the next time she’s on.

Speaking of animals, I was thinking about Shadow earlier, sorry that I was so mean to him at times. I’ll always wonder whatever became of him. He’d be about 11 years old now if he were still alive.

There were a few animal pictures I know Johnson’s seen, and a few she hasn’t, so I showed her those. I also let her know I played dumb when Chavez asked why I moved, saying I didn’t know why and that I was simply told to move, so I did. I told her I wasn’t about to tell her all she did to see to it that I remained alone. Johnson’s response to that was, “Yeah, it makes no sense to put you somewhere only to have to move you back out.”

I’ve been alone for 3 weeks now! Wish I could stay alone till I leave, but I’m sure this dorm will fill up by then. Meanwhile, I just hope the wrong DO isn’t on the next time someone comes in.

Peaches says Johnson’s her favorite DO. She’s my favorite now, too. I told her it used to be Palma and she said Palma’s really strict.

“True,” I said, “but that wasn’t why I liked her.”

“I know,” she said with a grin.

Anyway, the rats are in the door now, till someone tells me to take them down. I taped a picture of Houdini and Ratsy in one pane. It’ll be interesting to see how long they last and who tells me to take them down. My guess is that it’ll be either Misery or Kahn, although fortunately, Misery hasn’t worked here for a while.

Oh, did I mention that Laticia actually smiled at me today? She sure did, to my surprise.

---

Fuck you, freeloaders, for doing this to me! Yeah, we had to have hot dogs yet again. That’s 3 times in 4 days. I bit into the thing because I noticed it didn’t smell as spicy, and sure enough, there were little chunks of cheese in it, so I ate half of the fucking thing.

I told Johnson about my letters from Ida and was telling her how we tried to guess DO’s names by their initials. She got a kick out of that, and when I told her our guesses were Rebecca, Ronda, Renee or Rachel for her, she looked impressed, suggesting we might’ve hit it right on with one of those names. She had me cracking up at one point. I was telling her Ida suggested she might be a Rhoda and I disagreed, saying Rhoda’s are super ugly, so Ida suggested Ronda. This is when she laughed and said, “There you go. She’s only a little ugly. Call her Ronda.”

I told her I think she’s Rebecca, Rachel or Renee.

She asked me what names I came up with for other DOs, and I told her Nottelmann’s a Sarah or a Sandy, Kahn’s a Janet, black Johnson’s either a Glenda or a Gloria, and Palma’s a Juanita or a Janita. I also told her Pancake Face Smith was an Amanda, and she said in a low, sarcastic voice I’d never heard from her before that was actually a bit sexy, “Some people say she’s Barbie.”

I said, “I like Pancake Face Smith better, but that’s our secret.”

“OK,” she said playfully, “just between you and me.”