Last night Andy and I went to the Pub which wasn’t all that crowded for a Friday night. No one was there, such as Tracy and Nancy or this other feminine girl I once saw and liked. Linda was, though, and there were quite a few other butchy-type women in there, too.

After the Pub, we went over to the Frontier which was absolutely deader than dead. Andy said, “What is this, a private party?” There were only maybe 15 people there. It was a total joke.

Eventually, we may go check out 616. That’s up in the South Hadley area. The Springfield bars are a total waste of time, though. They’re 90% queens and 10% butchies. Where are all the other fems?!

I told Nervous to call me as soon as he woke up. The earlier the better so I can answer his questions and have him help me with my laundry. I want to get that done and the hell out of the way. Also, I’m gonna start getting tired soon. I do want to stay up as late as I can and then try to sleep as late as I can cuz tomorrow (supposedly) Lisa’s coming at 1:00 from Fairfield, Connecticut.

I’m sure she’ll be, if not ugly, then just there, meaning no real attraction. And more of a teenage girl than a woman. Isn’t that all I get? But if she’s a so-called decent, stable and mature person, I won’t be hearing from her again after tomorrow, if she shows up.

Does God really want me to go with guys? Is that what He’s been trying to tell me? All He’d send me, however, would be ugly assholes. It seems that no matter how great a person I may meet, male or female, He doesn’t want me with anyone who really turns me on sexually. Maybe he wants me alone.