Better do some updating before I fall behind.

Later on, I have to go see Helen. Meanwhile, I had two appointments yesterday. I was in and out for blood work. It was the surprise urine sample they wanted that held me up, but it worked out OK because I had time to kill anyway between the two appointments. Still, if the doctor had told me that they’d want urine, I’d have drunk a lot beforehand. We sat at a table near the vending machines while I guzzled strawberry/kiwi punch till I could go.

Again, this dentist is way better. She has a rapid, high-pitched voice that’s a bit obnoxious, but she’s very friendly, telling me I’m a good patient, and she does a good job. She filled my fillings quickly and painlessly, taking the time to tell me what she was doing, step by step.

I had commented on it being cold in there, then went to the bathroom in between the two fillings I had done (one was to repair a loose one). When I returned, I found that they were kind enough to give me a blanket!

I can’t wait till September 17th. That’ll be the day I’ll not only get the custom-made trays for the fluoride and bleach treatments but both upper and lower teeth will be permanently arched! It’ll take 3 installments of $130, though. Hopefully, I’ll never have to put so much money in my mouth again!

After the dentist, we went to Mary’s. Of course, Mary and Dave were at work and Ma was at daycare. We did wait around to see them, though. We hit the pool and Pepper was so funny. I like that dog more and more each time I see him, and I think that in a year or so if we get fences and a doggie door, that dog will be ours. Tom says Mary would hand him over to us the second we said the word. He follows me around a lot and sits by my feet. He’s a 40-pound black cocker spaniel. They got him from the Humane Society. He was a lot of fun when we were swimming, lapping up the water as I’d make waves by jumping off the diving board. I even dived too, which Mary says is scary. Anyway, poor Pepper ended up throwing up all that chlorinated pool water he drank. He took a shit too, in the house that Tom stepped on.

I got two letters from Mary in which she enclosed a picture the media took in one of them. It’s a nice picture, too. Her makeup looks nice. Nice full lips I wish I had. Her red hair tips were brown, though. Upon the suggestion of her lawyer, she’d take brown crayons prior to every court appearance and color the red part brown to match the rest of it. She looks awfully thin, though. In the picture, her lawyer sits next to her, but I cropped him out and put her in a small frame in the den.

She says she didn’t flee to Florida with “Monster.” Monster went first to try to escape his child abuse charges, and then she met up with him later. I’d certainly believe her before I believed anything the media said.

She also says she’s in 4 now, and her only celly at the moment is Nancy, who’s facing 30-50 years and goes to trial on the 20th (yesterday). I was shocked when I heard 30-50 years! I thought it was more like 7.

Marla went to the tents and then to Alpha, and Laticia goes home in a couple of months to do 7 years of intense probation. She too, doesn’t care for Laticia and her loud, rude, obnoxious ways. She says she’s a snitch, too (I believe it). Then she told me something concerning Laticia and Teresa. I thought these bitches were buddies, but they’ve obviously turned on each other from what it sounds like. I couldn’t quite understand what Mary was telling me, though. Something about Teresa writing some letter that Laticia snitched on her for, getting her into more trouble. The men in black and the FBI came and tore up her cell and interrogated her cellmates.

So, of the people I knew, Laticia, Teresa, Marla, and Nancy are still there. There’s probably more. I’ll bet Becky’s still there, too.

She says the DOs that usually do 1st shift are Tomaszewski, Toye, Hudgens, and Vasquez.

So Toye and Hudgens are no longer 2nd and 3rd shifts, huh? So many DOs have switched shifts. She didn’t mention Teddy Bear, so I asked her if she’s still on 2nd shift on her usual day of Monday. I kind of wish she’d switch to 1st shift. Because I’m not a morning person, we could hang out together after work if she wanted to. The only problem with that is that that’s when Tom’s home and she couldn’t stay up late with me if she had to be at work early. It’d be ideal if she was 1st shift and Tom was 2nd or 3rd.

She says 3rd shift is all new except for Jones (I asked her if Pérez ever switched to 2nd shift like she mentioned), there are a few new 2nd shift DOs, but Gibb works a lot, too.

Then she had me laughing my ass off after she said, “It’s Gibb, isn’t it?” I was like, Gibb? Gibb??? Gotta guess a little taller than that, Mary!

I don’t know why in the world she thinks it’s Gibb. She begged for a hint, so I told her she has a slight southern drawl. It’s very slight, but it’s there.

She says that although she still wants to get a book out there, she’s been having writer’s block. Also, they may make a movie about her case, which would be too bad, since they’d plug in whatever they wanted into the story. It’d be best if she got a book out so that there could be a true version of her story, although folks are always going to believe what they want to believe.

Later…

Saw Helen. I asked for her feedback about the fact that Tom and I haven’t had sex since I’ve been out. I explained to her that neither of us has been interested in that, although we still love each other. She said she’s heard people tell her that their relationships have evolved into platonic relationships after being together for many years. She said that as long as we’re both happy, why worry about or try to change what works for us? She said if it works for us both, it’s fine.

That’s what I figured she’d say, but I just wanted to make sure. I agree with her, too. She did say, though, to let Tom know that I’m open to discussion about it should he decide to bring it up in the future.

Of course. I’m up to discussing anything.

Anyway, Helen assured me I wasn’t neglecting him and that he’s a big boy who can speak up and come to me if he wants to do anything, and I believe this. For now, if we’re happy as we are, that’s all that matters, and I won’t bring the subject up unless he does, though Helen urges me to go to him if I want it. We’ll see. Who knows how I’ll feel down the road?

He told me earlier he was confused about us sleeping together. I had thought he said he wanted to do this when I got out, but then he said I didn’t want to. Well, let’s put it this way. I’m not going to say we’ll never try sleeping together, but for now, with my having so many appointments, I’d rather wait. I probably could get back to sleep at this point if he kept waking me up. I just didn’t think this was a good time to try. If I could ever get my appointments down, then maybe. Or better yet, I’d like to wait till we get to the boat cuz boats move all the time (I’ll explain the ‘boat’ later), which I’m hoping won’t take too many years. Since we’re platonic, and appearing more and more like we’re going to settle into being that way indefinitely or forever, there’s no hurry. Hell, my grandparents never slept together. A lot of couples don’t. Either way, we know we’ll both always love each other, and again, that’s what it all comes down to. That’s what’s most important. Where we sleep is secondary to that. I love him whether or not he sleeps 3” or 70’ away from me.

Helen also read this thing to me, explaining the difference between anger and rage and its destructiveness. She also read to me the positive side of anger and how it sometimes helps to motivate us.

We also talked about how I’m afraid to succeed for fear of someone ruining my accomplishments or stealing them from me altogether.

After Helen’s, we stopped at that pet store to pick up sawdust. Pine and cedar bedding are supposed to be bad for critters, so we’re trying something new. It’s 100% recycled paper. It’s tiny clumps that look like gray gravel. It’s almost damp-like. So far, I like how it’s dust-free, but time will tell if it really lasts twice as long and how well it absorbs piss and odors.