Andy’s not very happy right now. Like me, he hates people in general. So many lying, judgmental, hypocritical people out there.

Anyway, I thought he and his best friend Ken were pretty tight, but apparently not. Andy complains he’s too moody and Ken complains Andy talks to him like a child. He, Ken, and Judy play cards together every weekend. I guess Ken gets all pissed off and emotional when he loses, rather than sees it for the fun game that it’s supposed to be. That would frustrate me too. A game is just a game. I can only see getting pissed if a lot of money is at stake. Tom kicks my ass at miniature golf most of the time, but it’s still just as fun. So if you’re not gambling or betting, fun games should be just that…fun.

Andy also doesn’t like his mom being hypocritical and chastising him about his weight when she’s fat too. Plus, he says he’s caught the two of them leaning in toward each other whispering and then quickly stopping and pulling apart when he enters the room. He says he knows they’re talking about him and wonders if she’s filling Ken’s head with ideas of rebellion.

Is Andy getting high again? LOL.

So Andy wants to dump Ken but says he doesn’t have anyone to replace him with. He doesn’t understand why most people don’t like him and he has such a hard time making friends, and he only wants weekend friends for card games.

I’d play card games with him on weekends when our schedules matched up, as I told him, but since I can’t be there to do that, maybe he’ll get a VR headset someday and we can golf or something.

Did another Temu order for 60 bucks, mostly to feed my doll collection addiction. LOL. I got 3 dresses for the big dolls, a couple of pairs of shoes for the medium-sized dolls, and a dress for a small doll.

Then I got a figurine of an angel hunched over.

Got silicone things you put on your shoulders to keep bra straps from slipping since sports bras aren’t always appropriate, depending on what type of top or dress I’m wearing.

I got a short red shawl for when I’m playing with the rat so its nails don’t scratch my bare shoulders and arms. This is Florida. I’m sleeveless most of the time. We’re going to be getting the rat after my next schedule roll.

I also got this silicone thing you slip over your heels for dry feet. You add lotion to it first of course. My heels are dry, but so are the balls of my feet. This carpet is really rough on them!

Got a watermelon slicer, some eyeshadow, and a mascara guard. Because I’m so damn blind, I’m hoping this will help me be able to apply mascara without getting it all over me. I can barely see even with a magnifying mirror.

My new glasses and new Quest lenses are on the way.

Got a referral to a pulmonologist here in town and last night made me wonder again about the sleep apnea theory. I remember one of my dentists looked into my throat and asked if I had sleep apnea.

Last night, I woke up a million times, and two or three times I was coughing as if I had a tickle in my throat. This could easily happen if my throat muscles closed together. So maybe I really do have sleep apnea and that’s what’s sucking up most of my energy. If that’s not it, then it could be something a lot more sinister like maybe a heart valve. Both of these problems would suck either way. I mean, no one wants to have heart issues, but I definitely don’t want to sleep with a mask either. However, that may be my only option for getting the sleep/energy I need. It just might take me time to get used to it. Andy didn’t like it at first, but he said that now he’s okay with it because he feels so much better when he sleeps with it. He says that the few times he skips it like when he goes on vacation, he notices his energy levels go way down.

Why has my sleep been so fucking cursed in so many ways all my life??? It was hell on me getting up for school in the mornings as I would be so damn tired when my alarm went off. I would lie there awake for quite a while after bedtime too. Then the older I got, the harder it got to keep a schedule. Plus, I’m the lightest sleeper on Earth who has to sleep with sound machines. Now this shit. The quality of my sleep itself has been really poor this last decade.

Temperature: 83°