Eileen received, loves, and thanked me for the olfactory delights I sent her and even shared a picture of the honey vanilla stick burning on her kitchen island. Funny too, because I think the honey vanilla and the candy corn came out awful. They smell more like burning plastic.

Tammy also called and we talked for 45 minutes. She loves the magnolia and patchouli. My personal favorites are chocolate, butter rum, and pink sugar. Now that I know Tammy’s a flower power kind of gal I’ll keep that in mind next time I order oils online.

I’m so, so glad they’re happy with it! I really wasn’t sure that they would like it. Some people are bothered by incense smoke. According to what I read, incense smoke is supposed to be worse for you than cigarette smoke because it has smaller particles that get trapped deeper into the lungs. This is why I only burn a few sticks a day if even that.

So Tammy and I talked and she filled me in on the hardships of having the three different autoimmune diseases she has. It’s not as simple as mine where you’re lacking a hormone that you can be given replacement therapy for. It affects her muscles and even her organs.

I learned something new about both my sister and deceased brother. I didn’t know that Larry actually had open heart surgery and that he had stents as well as Tammy and Dad. I also didn’t know that Tammy had been to Arizona. I knew she went to Nevada when living in Texas but I didn’t know she’d been to Arizona.

She told me of her plans to fix things up after the damage from the hurricane, most of which is covered by insurance. Thank goodness for that because she received a lot of damage, especially to the roof and lanai. I’m glad I’m not her neighbor so I don’t have to hear it, LOL, as I hear enough shit here. Yesterday it was miraculously quiet but today Bob took an hour to blow his tiny lot which should take barely 15 minutes, even if the wonderful guy is 88. Also, the flippers are sawing away. Luckily that isn’t as easy to hear inside here because they’re working on the other side of the house next to the poor soul next to them.

Love how I could hear some kids screaming over the wall but only when I stepped outside and never inside the house. Haha, Tammy and I both jokingly refer to them as brats. Seriously, nothing against kids, brats, rugrats… whatever you want to call them. I just didn’t want to spend so much time and money on any of my own, and again, I hear so much shit from outside these walls that I don’t want to add any more racket inside. But yeah, nothing against them as it’s their parents who are to blame for the way so many of them behave like animals these days.

I would absolutely love to live in her park since she only hears landscaping once a week if even that and they have cameras everywhere and are much better at enforcing the rules than they are here. To be able to lie down during the daytime like she can without having to have sound machines running would be wonderful. I am a light sleeper, though, so I would still have something going just to drown out Tom’s movements when he was here and awake so as to not be woken up by the microwave beeping or if he dropped something, coughed, sneezed, etc.

However, I don’t know that we would ever be able to afford her park. I like her park and town but the closer you get to the coast, the more expensive things get. I know we could get more if we fix this place up, but most manufactured homes don’t have much value and we don’t want to invest time and money in making the place what someone else may want. I’d rather just make it what I want it to be, which basically means turning it into a circus and every realtor’s worst nightmare, LOL, and cutting my losses.

Mark is having issues I guess and therefore he’s having a colonoscopy done, Becky’s arm is worse and Sarah’s rich. She just got a fully loaded Infinity. I checked in with them on Facebook and I’m sure I won’t hear from them again unless I contact them on their birthdays. That’s just how they are and I’m pretty sure they’re not following me any more than I’m following them and that’s okay. I just get sick of hearing about certain people in every single fucking conversation Tammy and I have. I can stomach discussing Larry and Dad somewhat, but I would really rather not discuss my mother and I certainly don’t want to hear about Lisa, God or Bill. Bill wasn’t mentioned the last time, though.

Anyway, other than positive things to say about the incense and her park, it was all about the usual negative health stuff that’s been going on for a while now. It isn’t that I don’t believe her and that I don’t empathize with her as I know damn well what it’s like to suffer, but sometimes I wonder if she could have some degree of Munchhausen on top of being a hypochondriac. I guess her surgery has been postponed for now, too.

My new robe fits great but I have to laugh at this one review that said you can wear it up to a size 20. I’m about a 12 and I wouldn’t want this robe any smaller or me to be any bigger. It keeps me just as warm as my blue one but it’s lighter. It also has a hood. Love this colorful cupcake robe and look forward to my new purple winter nightgown which should arrive tomorrow. We got a discount from Walmart so that’s why got the nightgown and he got a new drill.

I might have to get new sweatpants soon because the cement gray and slate gray sweatpants I got at Sam’s a year or so ago are absolutely terrible. The insides of the legs constantly have lint balls.

On the way back from picking up my robe, Virginia asked me more about Jon.

I have been spotting for nearly a month and it just now started turning into a light flow. I’m starting to wonder if this shit is going to end this year. I don’t seem as waterlogged, though.

Understandably, Tammy disagrees with this but the reason I don’t want to take statins isn’t just because I have a medication phobia it’s also that I don’t have any annoying symptoms like I would if I stopped my thyroid medication. Then again, you can still have some symptoms even with treatment. I still have a big puffy moon face, for example. But I don’t see the point in taking a potentially dangerous drug for something that might happen in the future. I’d rather live 20 more years worry-free than 30 more with side effects and worries. I may take statins when he retires and can be around more as with my shit luck, if anything did happen, I’d be alone.

The loud car visited on Thursday but it was only here for a few minutes. I joked with Tammy about jinxing her park into becoming noisy if I were to move there. She said I couldn’t jinx motorcycles into tearing in and out because they’re not allowed there. OMG, she is so lucky! “Coincidentally,” they started allowing those in here when we moved in. I totally, totally believe without a doubt that I’m cursed in both the noise and sleep departments. It seems we all have some particular areas of life that we just can’t get a break in and are always unlucky in.

I am now connected to BOTH my former buddies on Twitter (and other sites). Wow, just wow. Who would have ever thought this day would come? It’s wonderful! So great to be reconnected! As I told Aly, after most fallouts I’ve had with people I am able to tell myself that that’s just life, shit happens, and I eventually lick my wounds and move on.

Furthermore, I’m not usually a forgiving person. Once you become a thing of the past, I don’t want to hear from you and I don’t want to hear about you either. Even though I had “met” other cyber friends and had family online I could talk to, it just wasn’t the same. Aly and Kim were/are like my besties on the Internet. We have enough that we don’t have in common to keep things interesting but also enough things in common that we can relate to each other. Like how Aly told me she too, has such tiny veins. She’s short like me, though one of the vampires said it’s hereditary. So I’m guessing Tammy has small veins too, and has to have a butterfly needle when having blood drawn.

She also asked me a question about Yelp and said it was so nice that we could talk again. It sure is! I know I wasn’t a perfect friend any more than they were, and I will do my best not to repeat past mistakes. That’s all anyone can do anyway.

I don’t know why it was so hard to let go of Aly, but I have no desire to reconnect with anyone else from my past. I may be dumb enough to talk to some people should they ever contact me, and being surprised by both Kim and Aly reminds me that I can’t be 100% sure they won’t, I definitely don’t want to talk to Andy. I’ll always treasure the good moments we had, but he’s a selfish, arrogant, judgmental and very negative person who will never change. At his age, you’re pretty much set in your ways and he has a right to be who he is. I just don’t want to be a part of it as the older I get the less tolerant I am of any kind of toxic drama.

Also, while it isn’t that I lack empathy or anything like that, talking to those who have nothing but negative stuff to say all the time gets depressing. I also tend to steer clear of emotional people as they’re not exactly calming and cheery to be around. Right or wrong, I see emotional people as being a bit on the weak and immature side. I should know. I was pretty emotional myself during most of my youth. Don’t get me wrong, I would still get pretty pissed off if someone screwed me over bad enough or someone I care about, but I have definitely mellowed out with age. There’s another reason for that but I’ll save that for another entry. It has to do with something I’ve been getting questions about so I’ll get to it soon. But yeah, call me insensitive, call me intolerant, call me judgmental, but sad people are depressing, emotional people are nerve-racking, and hypochondriacs/Munchhausen can be beyond annoying.

“At least it’s not rape,” said Matt Damon. That is so typical male! shakes head disgustedly I hate to break it to the bastard but being sexually harassed or nearly raped can be just as terrifying and traumatic. Once upon a time 30 years ago I was too trusting and desperate for friends. I took a chance and went over to this guy’s house that I was dumb enough to randomly dial and have a decent chat with by phone. Well, the guy attempted to rape me but I managed to fight my way out of it. I was very shaken up for days, and sure enough, when I call the cops, he had already beaten me to it to try to cover his ass as many perpetrators often do. When the cop I talked to said he said I was the one picking on him, I hung up in frustration and anger and immediately regretted telling the few people I told about it. As always, victims are blamed as if they’re somehow responsible for other people’s actions. The guy is lucky I wasn’t like I am now because I would’ve gotten a gun the next day, learned to shoot it the day after, and then gone back to his house the next day… even if it meant doing some time. Sometimes it’s better to be morally correct than legally correct and maybe even save some future victims from the same fate or worse while you’re at it. So yeah, Matt Damon, why don’t you drop dead and come back a woman and see what it’s like to be female in this world?!

Other than dreaming that Sarah left me a post-it note that I thought was both rude and defensive, I can’t remember any other dreams.