Oh, the lies people tell. Of the three people I bought dolls from so far on eBay, all have said they left positive feedback on my behalf in the feedback forum, yet only one really did.

Ashton’s full of their own tall tales too, telling me they’d send a brochure and an order form for a doll I wanted to see a better picture of when all they sent was a form and note saying they didn’t have any brochures for that doll. Why couldn’t they tell me before that they didn’t have the damn brochure?

I hope they’re done drilling in front as I’m getting rather sick of hearing the drone of that thing. It’s louder than Dan’s was because of where it’s situated on the land and where our house is situated on our land. I think they are just about done cuz it appeared they were pulling up drill bits earlier.

I’m officially off my day schedule now. After a week of sleeping 6-8 hours, I needed to sleep in. The problem with what keeps me from keeping a schedule is that, unlike most people who can still go to bed at their usual time on the days they sleep in, I can’t do that. For me, sleeping later means going to bed later. Maybe, when I get a new doctor, I can ask them why I need so much sleep.

Tom’s thinking of looking for another job because this one’s not looking promising. I still fear us having quite a financial crisis, too. Oh, God, why do you insist on having one person after another fuck us over and why do you let them get away with it?! Why do you always have someone tear us down after we work so hard to get ahead and to build ourselves up?

Anyway, I told him that life is too negative/positive to look for money too close to home. In other words, it’s either shit money close by or more money further away, so he should look further from home, I advised him.

Paula now says she’s going to put a hold on the Yves stuff (though I know she’ll never do it) so she can have money in case she does get thrown in jail tomorrow. She said she’ll call me tomorrow night if she doesn’t and that I should call her if I don’t hear from her so someone can tell me exactly what’s going on.

She shouldn’t be going to court. I tried to tell her that if she thinks there’s a chance she may go to jail, then it’d be silly for her to go to court, but you know Paula; she does all kinds of foolish things. What she needs to do is move without leaving a paper trail and stay out of trouble. That mostly means ignoring the abusive PRs she loves so much.

I wanted to scream when I got Mary’s letter yesterday with more drafts which I told her not to keep sending, but then I was relieved when I read she wouldn’t send anymore. I hope not. I keep trying to tell her to just write the book while she’s in jail, then when she’s out she can organize her book and try to get it published from there.

Unfortunately, I mailed her final book copy to her before I got her letter telling me to wait till she could send stamps (like I’d really get them) so I could get a copy to her with bigger print since her eyes were so bad she already needed reading glasses. I was shocked! Here I was pissed off at going blind in my late 30s, so that must really suck to need reading glasses in her mid-20s.

I’m down to 126 now. I wish I could say it’s due to all the brisk walking I’ve been doing, but it’s nothing I’ve done. It’s all thanks to the water pills. It won’t go no lower than 125. Once I hit 125, I have to practically starve myself to lose anymore, then once I eat normally again, it all comes right back. The only way to lose weight and keep it off naturally would be to starve and I just don’t want to do that. I don’t have the willpower it’d take. Meanwhile, I guess I can’t say all my hard work is going to waste. Exercising like this is keeping me from gaining a lot more than I already have over the last 5 years.