So I get up to find a “Mary J” sent me an invite on Facebook, and automatically assumed it was a friend of a friend. Then I studied her profile pic and could clearly see it was Mary G! Wow, I was starting to think I’d never hear from her again. As long as she doesn’t go asking for a million favors (cuz then I feel used) it’s great to have her back in my life. I had assumed she was threatened against communications with “ex-cons” and that vindicated or not, she was ordered not to have any contact with me since we were cellies, after all, back in January of 2001. Wow, it’s been nearly 12 years!

I saw other pics of her and she looks great. She actually joined FB a few days after her release. She has about 20 friends, but none of her sons are connected to her. Her oldest is an adult now, so they can’t order her not to contact him, but her other two, who were adopted, she probably doesn’t know their location. She is friends with her lawyer, though, who she describes as also being her friend and mentor.

She’s showing up on my tracker as being in Ft. Lauderdale and has only checked out my LJ journal that I know of. I’m surprised she was only there for 2 minutes, but I could’ve had other Ft. Lauderdale visitors for more than 2 minutes, and in all my blogs, but just don’t know it. I wouldn’t have thought she’d come up as being in Ft. Lauderdale, for one, since she was supposed to be in a place in western FL, and I can’t go back and check cuz she’d be scrolled off the list by now. But yeah, it seems I did have some Ft. Lauderdale visitors even though she appears as a first-time visitor.

What I don’t get is how the hell she could’ve jumped to a specific entry from the landing page when there was no link to it there. Maybe it was on my FB wall.

I’ve thought of her over the years. I believe we were last in touch when I was “with” Marie, so that would’ve been in early 2010. I have so many questions for her! Like who she’s staying with and what kind of probation she’s on and for how long. I won’t be providing certain details in my public journals, though, and I never use real last names.

Mary is a very kind, sweet, compassionate person whose worst crime in life was being too nice to the wrong people thus resulting in deadly consequences she’ll have to live with for the rest of her life, as she’ll be the first to admit. She has never tried to play down or deny what happened 13 years ago, and I have always admired her strength, her intelligence, her courage, and her will to go on. I don’t think I could’ve done it myself.

Later…

Andy’s pissing the shit out of me again, this time by making fun of my driving phobia, saying that after a few times of driving it will dissipate. I have driven a few times. More than a few times. But I don’t like being called a chicken and shit like that. There’s being supportive and encouraging, and then there’s being mean, insensitive, pushy and insulting. I don’t make fun of his fears, and yes, there’s a difference between teasing and making fun. I tease Tom about the dentist but I would never push him to see one.

When am I going to learn to keep my mouth shut and quit broadcasting my fears, phobias and medical problems? I’m just going to keep on being laughed at and picked on for them, though it’s a shame when it’s a “friend” doing it, and come to think of it, he really is the only one that has so far. Sad. Real sad. What’s even sadder is that he’s making fun of shit he can relate to and that he’s been through himself. Usually, it’s those that don’t get it that do the picking and the prodding. Ok, so maybe he didn’t get the sleep thing, but he’s been poor, he’s been fat, and he once had his own driving phobia.

Had a strange concoction of dreams last night. First we were dirt poor and living in an apartment. Then we were living in a nice house.