It got down into the 20s last night. At 11:30 it was already down to 38°. When Tom got up it was 28° and the sun had already risen.

I haven’t seen any other prairie dogs since I spotted the one at the side of the house.

I gave Tom my extra $33 that was leftover between my birthday and Christmas money for him to do what he wanted and he decided to get 11 Slingo tickets which are $3 each, though not all at once. He’s already won $34 and still has 3 more tickets to get.

Now here’s my most shocking news, yet it’s good news. I haven’t had to use my inhaler since last night when I wrote about how I was sick of them making me congested and that I’d prefer tightness over that! I woke up tight an hour before I got up (it was like old times with the shooting, so I heard), but have been fine ever since. I had a tiny bit of congestion after I got up and that’s been it so far aside from occasional waves of tightness. I don’t want to get my hopes up, but if I can heal or at least control my asthma inhaler-free, that’d be so wonderful! I’ve spent so much time healing others or making others sick that I haven’t really concentrated on myself. It seems I could’ve very well been sitting on a treasure chest of powers all these years and never known it. I just never thought of it or the possibility that I could heal or curse people. It would mean so much to me if I could have some control over my health. After being stripped of my birthright to bear children by God (even if he made the right and the best decision to do so), to finally have some say concerning my own body means a lot to me. A real lot.

It makes me wonder other things like, could I heal myself if I had cancer, not that I’d ever want to have to find out? Could I prevent pregnancy if Tom and I were more than friends and he’d get off more than once in a blue moon? Then again, I suppose that one wouldn’t count. Meaning, if something isn’t in your cards anyway, it doesn’t matter what you can or can’t do, or what you want or try to do. I still believe Tom could get off in me a dozen times a day and nothing would happen, though I also wouldn’t be that foolish to let him do so what with not wanting a kid and us being broke every other half hour.

I’m going to take Tom’s advice and not spread myself too thin. Meaning, I’m not going to try to make any physical changes for the better between him and me unless they’re necessary. This means that I’m not going to try to influence my weight when I return to my diet on the 1st. It’s not necessary to lose weight, but it is necessary to breathe, so I’ll focus on things like that. I get waves of tightness here and there, but am fighting them by doing the ballooning technique and trying to make myself yawn which always opens things up. Yawning is caused more by a need for extra oxygen than tiredness, though most people don’t realize this. I’m basically doing the things I did in jail during the times when the welfare bums said I couldn’t have an inhaler.

I can’t help but wonder – where did all these powers come from and why was I chosen to have them? Tom and I had to laugh when I told him that if he could run into the old folks and tell them all of all the abilities I’ve developed since I saw them last, they’d think he’d gone completely insane.

I don’t think, for instance, that I’d put a “miscarriage spell” on a pregnant teenage crackhead if I could because I don’t think God put me here to correct or undo other people’s mistakes. It wouldn’t be my mistake to make. It’d be the kid’s mistake to make.

As I said, the 1st is when I start back up with the diet. Now that I know how to keep regular, my only two challenges will be keeping my mouth shut to the extra calories, and not succumbing to the boredom that an hour of trudging away on the treadmill brings. I’m going to settle for losing just 10 pounds. At 38 years of age, I can’t expect to ever have my 25-year-old body back again anyway.

I read that they’ll remove my book listing if it doesn’t sell in 60 days, and I’m sure it won’t. No one ever wants to buy anything from me except pipes! Tom doesn’t think it’ll sell because it’s a common book. He wants to list some rare books he has and see if those will sell.

If there were two curses I’d lift from us if I could, it’d be the money and breakage curse for sure. I wouldn’t even bother with our lack of desire for sex. That’s just not as important to me. I’d rather not struggle and not be horny for Tom than be struggling and wanting to get it on with someone who doesn’t want to get it on with me. I hated that; how I always wanted sex in the beginning and he never did.

Later…

It’s not even 7:30 yet it’s already 37°! It just may be in the teens come 6 AM.

As always, I have my incense going. My favorites seem to fluctuate. My top two favorites were fruit and honey, but now I’d say it’s chocolate and angel.

Haven’t heard that loud truck the renters had since the trailer disappeared so maybe someone really was living in it.

This is the longest we’ve gone without seeing spiders in here. How much of it is me remains to be seen. Once the weather warms back up, we’ll find out. I miss summer already, but I don’t miss the huge electric bills or working out when it’s really hot. The fans help, but I hate to crank up the AC and cost us a fortune when I’m working out, so I just sweat my ass off. We try to keep it in the low 80s during the hot months.

I love my Little Fella, but never have I had a problem with a rat pissing like this before. He doesn’t just piss when he’s out of the cage, but every time I go to pick him up, he’s wet. Tom suggested that maybe he has a form of incontinence, but where is all this piss coming from? I mean, I just don’t see how this rat can have that much piss in him to begin with no matter how huge he is!