Yes, I think resuming contact with Mary might’ve been a mistake after all. I don’t know. I have such mixed emotions about it. It’s just that she’s such a pest with all the damn requests! Who does she think I am? Her slave? I apparently misunderstood her. I thought I was to enclose José’s letters with mine, but she wants me to type up letters to him, which are novels, and then send them to him. This is because the place they just transferred him to recognized her handwriting and sent her letters back to him. I appreciate the fact that she sent 2 books of stamps and 20 envelopes and offered to send paper too, but she really should’ve waited for a response to the request. That’s nice that she was willing to send $25 a month in stamps and more, but she doesn’t understand that I don’t have the time and ink money for this. Unless you’ve got the money to keep replacing old cartridges with new ones, printing’s a major bitch that’s hit or miss. As it is, Tom had to swap our printers because we simply couldn’t get the Lexmark to print. So now I’m back to my old Epson. Like I said, I just wish she would have waited because now I’ve got all these stamps and stamped envelopes. I asked if she wanted me to send them to her aunt or just keep them. She hasn’t even gotten my last letter. In that letter, I really put my foot down about the favors and not wanting to do any typing jobs for others. I have enough typing of my own to do, regardless of ink costs and printer problems. She really overwhelms me at times.

Also, after saying in her last letter that she didn’t want to publish her book, she wants me to consider typing it to completion for her under a fictitious name and claim that any events related to real-life circumstances are purely coincidental. Again, I told her I don’t like doing favors for others, especially big ones, and explained the printer problems and the fact that it’s too time-consuming. I also reminded her for the millionth time that she’d be better off waiting till she gets out of there. She can’t get any money from it in custody. I appreciate the fact that she trusts me to hold any book sale money for her and how she says she’ll give me some, but I just wish she’d wait till she can be independent and learn to take care of herself. I know it’s hard to be independent in jail, but she can only expect others to do so much for her. Another reason I don’t want the job of typing her letters to this loser is that I don’t want to risk getting into any trouble. Remember, I’m the one that can’t get away with shit. I’m a white Jew living in a Christian country of increasing color, so I don’t want to set myself up for trouble. Meanwhile, I recommend she consider disguising her handwriting and having her aunt send letters like she has been, even though they can’t talk as freely as they’d like to that way. I told her I hoped things would work out, and I do. It’s just that I don’t want to get involved and I don’t want to be responsible for their silly, naïve little communications. It’s just so absurd the things they say and believe! I don’t know why he was transferred, but they’re supposedly really strict there, and José’s supposedly trying to get clearance from the warden so they can communicate, but I don’t see how he stands a chance. I encouraged Mary to just hang on and keep in mind that she’s not going to be locked up forever.

I know it’s dishonest of me, but I told her I sent José the first 17-page letter she sent me to type up since she already sent me the letter without waiting for a reply, but that I wouldn’t send any more, and to tell him not to send any to me to send to her. In a week from now, I’ll claim that the letter was returned with no explanation. Meanwhile, unless she wants me to send them to her aunt, I got a lot of stamps and stamped envelopes out of this frustration!

This doesn’t mean I won’t send any emails for her if they’re quick and not too often or do little things like that and occasional online research, but the book and letter carting are just too much for me. There is one request I can handle each time I write her. She asked me to burn incense while I type the letters which makes them smell like heaven – no problem. It does smell great! I wouldn’t mind sending her a light bulb ring and any oil I may try and not like once she’s out.

I believe her when she says she’d do me favors if I needed them, but other than keeping tabs on Teddy Bear back in Estrella, I can’t imagine her ever being in a position to do me any favors.

I also had to get on her for overstuffing envelopes and causing us to pay some of the postage. Given all the stamps she sent, 23¢ is no hardship on us, but in the future, I hope she’ll be more careful. I also told her she need not send any religious material to me. I just hate to see her waste her time and money sending me things I’m not interested in.

Mary has a lot of good traits. She’s a sweet, compassionate, generous and forgiving soul, but she’s also a pest, naïve and obviously unsure of herself. First she wasn’t going to have any more kids, now she wants to have either a son named Dante with José or a daughter named Bella with him.

She’s also still paranoid I’m going to post her book online and I had to again explain to her that I have no desire to do so. She said I could use her name in a book of mine once she’s released, but as I told her, I really don’t see why I’d need to. I’ve used other names and places I know, but her name or life story wouldn’t fit into any future projects that I can see.

She shared some of her and José’s sexual fantasies and desires with me in her letter and some of them are utterly sick and disgusting! She says José wants her to be a little dominatrix and the thought of that excites her. To each their own, but I don’t see how one can be excited about the prospect of beating someone they’re supposed to love, or of being beaten. I had to laugh when she said she wished she could have sex with herself cuz that would turn José on. It’s just funny hearing someone say how they’d love it if they could have sex with themselves. The disgusting part is that José wants her to pee all over his face. That’s sick! It also goes to show just what kind of guy he is, but of course, she can’t see it. She’s got this false delusion of him getting out, them marrying, then having kids and living happily ever after. Even if he could get out of there, which I doubt, they would never be allowed to associate with one another. Especially him. She may not end up on probation for life, but he certainly will if he gets out. They simply don’t let convicted murderers go that easily, and when they do, they tend to keep them on parole.

Tom learned that our new little dumpster isn’t for recyclables. He said every house on the block but ours has one of these for regular trash, and also a bigger one for recyclables. I don’t know why we don’t have a recycling dumpster, but we’re not gonna be here much longer anyway if all goes well. It’s nice to have these for trash in the meantime because it’s on wheels and has a lid.

I see a pattern beginning to form next door. This is the second weekend where those guys come over, they do a barbecue, toss some knives, then it’s dead quiet all weekend. I’d say somebody over there is taking off for the weekend with them. If there is a pattern, that means they’ll go back and forth tomorrow like crazy.

I know it can’t hurt anything by doing this, but I wonder if Tom’s losing it, too. He actually carried out one of the rituals that are supposed to remove curses. I was laughing, teasing him about being just as bad as Mary, though I did help him with it. You pour 3 drops of oil into a small bowl of water, place a small needle through the eye of a bigger needle and put it in the bowl. Then you add dabs of salt to it while you take scissors and cut at it and chant, “Eyes against eyes, return to sender.” He thinks it worked, but I doubt it. I still say the curse was put on us by God and that you just can’t fight God.

Someone went down the street just now shouting, “I love this woman!” I guess it’s based on a commercial where a man gives a woman either an engagement ring or a necklace or something like that. At first I thought it was Romeo screaming at Bev, who’s become a bit of a klutz. We’ve heard a few bumps and bangs over there that suggest she may’ve dropped things. I don’t think it’s the animals.