My mannequin has a scrape on her inner wrist caused by the bracelet she’s wearing so she looks like she tried to commit suicide. She’s one stylish-looking lady right now, though. I decided she’d been standing around in the same outfit long enough, so I changed her.

Speaking of mannequins and dolls, I had a fun dream for once last night. Yeah, it was pretty funny as opposed to getting stuck in places I didn’t like to be in or worrying about money. In the dream, I was miraculously able to find a job in this state at a gift shop, and miraculously able to keep a schedule, too. The woman that owned the store got in a shipment of small, but very nice dolls. They were $22. I said I wanted to buy one and she asked if I had a doll collection.

“A retired one, yes. But these are so nice so I just gotta have one. I love these realistic-looking dolls everyone calls spooky.”

She asked what kind of collection I had, and I told her I used to collect modern dolls till I got tired of the space they took up and having to dust them all.

“How much did your dolls cost?” she asked next.

“Some are a few bucks, some a few hundred bucks, with your average being around 100 bucks. My mom would shit if she knew the value of my collection, even though we made a lot of money between 1998-2007 and I sold a lot of it off.”

So I returned to the store another time with Tom in tow. Now the dolls were $125 and about 30” tall instead of around a foot. Tom said their hair smelled sooo good, and I ran my fingers through one of the redheads and said, “Wow, they have rooted hair.”

So I brought one home and then Tom went out somewhere. Now the doll, a brunette, had “come to life” and was literally life-size. “Don’t move and don’t think when Tom gets in,” I told her. “I don’t want him to know you’re alive in any way or have any awareness. It may freak him out.”

Then I woke up and even Tom got a kick out of the dream when I told him about it. I wish Dreamland could always be so amusing.

All had been quiet for days. I could even stand to turn the sound machines off. Then sure enough, Jesse went out on Friday night and the dogs went crazy from 8pm till around midnight. I was surprised he didn’t go out this evening too, as it seems to have become a habit for him to spend Friday and Saturday nights out either in the bars or perhaps seeing someone. Seems a little late to be doing anything with the kid. All was quiet today, though. No barking, no engine gunning.

Marie sent an email saying she doesn’t expect me to understand, but she’s sick of feeling so lonely and so miserable every fucking day of her life. I totally empathize with her and know what she’s going through, and I told her this, reminding her that I was alone too, before meeting Tom. What I didn’t tell her was that if she’s still alone at her age, she probably always will be. We just can’t change what isn’t meant to be. Nonetheless, I encouraged her to try Yahoo! personals or something like that. Unless they’re lying, this way she can get a better idea up front of who’s taken and who isn’t, and who wants a serious relationship versus just fun. I also told her to look at what she does have as she encourages me to do when I’m feeling blue. I told her she may have debt, but she also has money, insurance, and no rent to pay.

Damn, I wish she would meet Miss Right! Not just for her sake so she can be happy, but so she’s not pestering me so much either. She tells me to let her know if she’s bugging me, but I hate to be mean by brushing her off. I’d hate to make her think I don’t care.